Her entire body shuddered at the intimate caress, and her hips rolled upward, seeking a deeper contact. “Josh, please…” she whispered raggedly.
Lifting his mouth from her breasts, he looked up at her face, flushed with sensual longing. Her eyes were bright and fevered and unfocused. She looked beautiful, and damn exciting, spread so wantonly beneath him.
“Please what?” he murmured, refusing to give her what her body craved unless she admitted her desire and need for him. “Tell me what you want, and I’ll give it to you.”
She bit her bottom lip and moaned in frustration. Then, seemingly unable to deny her need for him, she told him exactly what she wanted. “Touch me…kiss me…”
He touched her, watching her slowly unravel as he pushed aside the elastic band of her panties, eased a finger inside her, and slicked his thumb along petal-soft folds of flesh.
He lowered his head and kissed her, a slow, languid melding of lips and tongue that matched the sensual rhythm of his fingers.
Loving her was the easiest part of all; his feelings came naturally, from the depths of his heart and soul.
In the next instant she gave him what he ultimately wanted. Her climax was powerful and emotional, making her shudder and cry out for him as the waves of pure, blissful fulfillment engulfed her. When it was over and Paige’s body ceased quivering, Josh released her hands and rested his head just above her breasts, absorbing the wild beating of her heart that echoed the racing of his pulse. His own body throbbed, but this moment wasn’t about his pleasure and surrender, but hers.
She knew it, too. “Damn you, Josh,” she said in a low, fierce tone that expressed her anger at the situation, and herself.
He chuckled lightly, and her nipple tightened as his breath caressed the tip. “Those weren’t quite the words of gratitude I was hoping for.”
She twined her fingers in his hair, forcing him to lift his head and look at her. “You’re an arrogant bastard.”
He grew serious, opting for honesty instead of humor. “When it comes to you, yeah, I probably am. I want you to think about everything you’ll be leaving behind if you move back to Connecticut.”
“Great sex?” she asked flippantly.
His mouth thinned in annoyance. “What’s between us is more than sex, as hot and fantastic as it is. You know that, even if you won’t admit it.” He smoothed her hair away from her face, the gesture more an excuse to touch her than anything else. “I can’t make the bad memories go away, but I can replace them with good memories if you’ll just give me the chance.”
“It’s not that simple.” Untangling her fingers from his hair, she moved from beside him and sat on the edge of the mattress. She tugged at the sides of her dress, covering her breasts. “It’s not only about us, or Anthony, but who and what you are, too.”
“A cop,” he said flatly, finally understanding.
She nodded, her expression regretful. “Unfortunately, yes.”
He stood and dragged a hand through his tousled hair. His body was tense from the arousal still thrumming through his veins, and from Paige’s stubborn ideas. “I’m a homicide detective, Paige,” he said, trying to reason with her. “Not a vice cop like Anthony was.”
“The danger is still there, so is the risk. The gun you wear proves that. This case we’re both involved in proves it.” Her argument was fierce and heated, spurred by her own personal experience. “I can’t go through that again. I want a husband I can count on coming home at night. I want a stable, wholesome environment for my children. And if that’s selfish of me, then so be it.”
He chose his rebuttal carefully. “I don’t think it’s at all selfish to want those things. But I also know it’s possible to be married to a cop and have a good, stable home life. My parents are proof of that. You’ve met them and can see for yourself how happy they are together. And I don’t think any one of their five kids suffered because my father was a cop.”
Her chin shot up. “And how many times do you think your mother stayed up all night long while your father was out on patrol or working on a case, wondering if he was going to come home in the morning? Or if she’d find his partner at the door to inform her that her husband had been killed in the line of duty?”
Her bitter memories were difficult to compete with. “I’m sure, in a lot of ways, my mother felt exactly the way you did.” He’d heard enough complaints from colleagues about the strain their job put on their marriages, many of which didn’t survive the pressure, to know the problem was prevalent in law enforcement. But buckling under the stress didn’t happen to everyone. “My father is a good man, Paige, loyal and scrupulous to a fault. Those traits are what matters when it comes to his devotion to his wife and family. It’s the difference between me and Anthony.”
She shook her head and whispered, “I can’t do it again, Josh.” Standing, she headed for the adjoining bathroom.
Desperation gripped him, and he cut straight into her path, halting her. “Paige-”
She pressed her fingers to his lips, cutting off any further debate. Tears welled in her eyes, and her bottom lip quivered. “Don’t make this any harder than it already is, okay, Josh?”
She didn’t wait for an answer. Stepping around him, she sequestered herself in the bathroom. After a moment, the sound of running water filling the sunken tub broke the silence.
Sighing heavily, Josh dropped back onto the bed and scrubbed a hand over his face, mentally berating himself for being such an idiot. Christ, what a mess he’d made of things. He’d pushed Paige before she was ready, and although she’d yielded to his physical seduction, he now realized the emotional scars her husband had inflicted were a long way from healing.
After the hell Anthony put Paige through, Josh was seriously beginning to wonder if he had the right to make his own selfish demands.
WORK WAS her only refuge. Paige welcomed the afternoon diversion of helping Liz unpack a new shipment of spring outfits, accessories and lingerie and putting them on display. Too soon, Josh would arrive to whish her back to the beach house where she’d have to endure another long, tense evening of polite talk with a man she’d never before had any trouble conversing with-until her life had been turned upside down.
Between Liz’s surveillance at the boutique, and Josh shadowing her the rest of the time, she was feeling cooped up and boxed in. If she wanted solitude, she escaped to the bathroom, and even then she’d learned i she exceeded the paranoid cops’ time limit, they rapped on the door for a response, shattering the private moment.
Liz accompanied her to lunch every day, and to run errands and do the banking. The woman was never more than a scream away, and though she had a lively personality and appeared slender and unsubstantial beneath the facade, Liz was one tough officer. Per Josh’s instructions, during lulls in business Liz had taken Paige into the office and taught her basic self-defense maneuvers. Paige had been awed by Liz’s strength and agility, and the variety of ways a woman could disable a man if the need arose.
Ultimately, Paige couldn’t wait to get this entire mess over with. Couldn’t wait to resume a normal life. And in that vein, she’d called her sister, Valerie, earlier tha morning to touch bases and chat, needing that familia connection she’d missed so much the past three years While she couldn’t give her sibling an exact day for he homecoming, she’d promised Valerie she’d be return- ing to Connecticut soon. Not wanting to worry her sis- ter, or her parents, she refrained from mentioning he current predicament, or the danger her life was in.
“Wow, would you take a look at this stuff?” Liz exclaimed excitedly as she pulled a froth of silk and lace from a box she’d just opened. Satiny jeweled tones in amethyst, emerald, sapphire and ruby shimmered beneath the overhead lights and slid through her fingers like quicksilver. “These nightgowns are gorgeous, and so sexy! How am I going to choose just one color?”
Paige laughed, enjoying Liz’s enthusiasm, and the diversion from her thoughts. It hadn’t taken long for Paige to realize that Liz was a clotheshorse at heart, and her current assignment allowed her to indulge the habit on a daily basis. “Well, you could always buy one of each.”
“You’re absolutely no help to my addiction,” she complained good-naturedly. Holding up a sapphire gown to her slim figure, she gazed thoughtfully at her reflection in the mirror, located in the back storeroom, where they tagged merchandise before putting it out on the floor. “Before this case is over, I’m going to have to sign my month’s salary over to you.”
