were okay with that.'
An odd pressure constricted Jessica's chest, and she managed, just barely, to keep her voice steady. 'Why wouldn't I be okay with that?'
'Because you'd be spending Christmas without me.'
For the first time ever. Every other year she and Brooke flew out to West Virginia to spend the holiday with their mother and stepfather, but this was the year they stayed in Denver-and she usually accompanied Brooke to the Jamisons' for their family get-together.
Jessica didn't miss the tinge of guilt and reluctance lacing Brooke's voice, and knew her sister would cancel her trip if she suspected that Jessica felt even a glimmer of longing to spend the holiday with her. Jessica didn't begrudge Brooke the time alone with her husband, and she wasn't about to spoil her sister's plans.
'I'll be fine, really, Brooke,' she said, keeping her tone upbeat and cheerful. 'It's not a big deal.'
Brooke hesitated for a moment. 'Well, I think you ought to consider stopping by Marc's parents' on Christmas. I know Kathleen would love to see you.'
Jessica couldn't help but shake her head at her sister's protective nature. As much as she knew the Jamisons would welcome her for the holiday, it just wouldn't be the same without Brooke there. Yet, to appease her sister, she said, 'I'll think about it.'
'Good.' Brooke sounded satisfied with that. 'Now, back to New Year's Eve. How about you and I pick a day before Christmas to go to lunch and go shopping together for dresses for the party?'
Her sister's enthusiasm brought a smile to her lips. 'I'd like that.'
'Me, too. Let me know when is good for you, and I'll take the day off work. We'll have a girls-only outing.'
They said their goodbyes, and Jessica hung up the phone. And suddenly, inexplicably, she felt very much alone… and not so perfectly happy with her solitary life.
'I found a caterer who's available for our New Year's Eve party, and they faxed me a menu of appetizers, along with the cost.' Jessica slid the estimate toward Ryan, who was sitting next to her at his kitchen table. 'What do you think?'
He picked up the piece of paper and considered the items in a very businesslike manner. She'd been at his house for half an hour, and so far, his behavior had been nothing short of exemplary. He hadn't issued even one sexual advance or flirtatious overture, nor had he mentioned anything of what had transpired between them the last time they'd been together. He hadn't even discussed his request for her to think about accompanying him to his firm's party. There were no casual touches, or heated glances. Indeed, judging by his pragmatic expression, he could have been dealing with one of his clients.
She told herself she was glad he was being efficient and agreeable-it made planning the party so much smoother, and kept their relationship on a more even keel. Yet his passive attitude actually bothered her. She was used to bantering with Ryan, and fending off his sexy, suggestive taunts. Though her body was still very much aware of him sitting next to her, he appeared unaffected by her presence.
She found his polite pleasantry, well,
Now that he'd had time to mull over her last rejection, had he decided that she just wasn't worth pursuing? Maintaining a purely friendly relationship would be for the best, of course, and exactly what she wanted, she reminded herself.
Or did she?
She wasn't sure anymore. While she knew Ryan couldn't provide her with the happily-ever-after she wanted for herself, there was one blatant fact she couldn't refute: Ryan Matthews was the sexiest man she'd ever met, and she wanted him.
Sneaking a glance at him as he bent his head over the caterer's list, she took in his strong profile, the chiseled line of his jaw, and those firm lips that had shown her sinful delights. She blamed Ryan for introducing her to such carnal pleasures and filling her head with lascivious thoughts. She held him responsible for making her imagine night after night what it would be like to indulge in a slippery, sensual, erotic interlude with him and sample the sweet, heady, euphoric taste of sex.
He set the list back on the table and met her gaze. His eyes were dark brown and warm, but lacked the teasing sparkle she was used to seeing. 'I'm impressed. There's quite a selection to choose from.'
Having been taught a very memorable lesson on the effects of diversity, she'd made sure they had a wide variety at their disposal. 'I thought we could get a vegetable tray, along with a meat and cheese tray, and rolls and condiments,' she said. 'Then we can each choose three different appetizers, and that should make a nice assortment for everyone to snack on.'
'Fair enough.' He rubbed his hand along his jaw, and consulted the list again. 'I'll go with the chicken fingers, fried mushrooms, and crabrangoon.'
She jotted down his selections in her notebook to relay to the caterer next week. 'And I'll pick the antipasto salad, mini quiches, and pizza rolls.'
He passed her the appetizer list and grinned in that easy-going manner he'd seemingly adopted for the day. 'Sounds great.'
They spent the next hour companionably, discussing other aspects of the party. She went over her ideas for New Year's Eve party favors, and without argument Ryan agreed with her vision. He helped her decide on the drinks and types of alcohol they'd serve, and didn't reject her decorating plans to transform his home with evergreen, twinkling lights, floral arrangements and scented candles.
All in all, they settled the planning with minimum fuss.
As she bent her head over her notepad, she felt something rub up against her calf. For a moment she thought it was Ryan's leg, until a soft, plaintive meow caught her attention. Setting her pen on the table, she glanced down to find a fluffy gray cat sitting on the tiled floor between her and Ryan.
Jessica smiled, charmed by the big green eyes staring up at her. 'Well, hello there.'
Another dainty meow in response.
Ryan gently scooped up the feline and settled her onto his jean-clad lap. 'I don't believe the two of you met the last time you were here. This is my housemate, Camelot.'
Jessica watched Ryan's long fingers stroke along Camelot's spine. The cat's eyes drooped slumberously, and a contented purr rumbled in her throat. A shivercoursedthrough Jessica. She knew exactly how the feline felt because Ryan had the same effect on her whenhe touched her.
Which he hadn't done all afternoon.
She scratched Camelot under her chin, and the cat stretched her neck out for better access. 'She's a beauty.'
'And a bed hog,' Ryan added, humor in his deep voice. 'It doesn't matter that I have a king-sized mattress. Wherever I sleep is exactly where she wants to curl up-usually right between my feet so I can't move without jostling her.'
Jessica laughed, though she couldn't help but envy the cat for having the luxury of sleeping with such a sexy man. Before her thoughts took a decidedly provocative turn, with
'And Marc left a RSVP message on my recorder, too, which is a good thing.' He grinned, and continued petting Camelot, who'd gone on to lovingly knead his thigh with her paws, her adoration of her owner obvious. 'We couldn't have the party without them.'
She nodded, realizing their luck in that area. 'Though I'm sure we would have figured out some way to persuade them to be here.' She glanced over the party's agenda. 'So, you're okay with everything we decided on today?'
He shrugged as if it were all of little consequence to him. 'Sure.'
Amazing how quickly they wrapped things up when she had his cooperation. She gathered her papers and organized them into a neat pile, unable to believe that Ryan was going to let her leave without attempting to waylay her. She should have been grateful for his courteous, accommodating conduct, but she found herself undeniably disappointed instead.
