Last Stand of the DNA Cowboys

The Minstrel Boy stretched. He wondered if Billy's seeming recovery was permanent. 'It does make a certain kind of sense.'

'So?'

'Sure, let's get going. How are we going to travel, and where are we going to head for?'

'That's what we wanted to talk to you about.'

'We heard you had a submarine.'

The Minstrel Boy sat down again. 'I sold it.'

'Damn.'

'Maybe you could buy it back again.'

The Minstrel Boy scowled and shook his head. 'I doubt I've got enough money, and anyway, a submarine isn't exactly the most flexible means of transport.'

'So what do we do?'

Reave hitched up his pants. 'If you're talking flexible, there's nothing more flexible than a lizard.'

Billy grimaced. 'That's really doing it the hard way.'

For once the Minstrel Boy agreed with him. 'Yeah, Reave, you may be callused and saddle sore, but I came down here with an ass as soft as a baby's.'

Reave was not convinced. 'I've already got a lizard in the stables, and I'm sure we could get two more out of Diamenti.'

There was a sudden awkward silence. Everyone looked at Renatta sitting cross-legged on the circular bed.

'So you finally remembered about me?'

The Minstrel Boy was embarrassed. 'You want to come with us?'

'I don't want to stay here.'

'It could get rough.'

'It's been real easy up to now, hasn't it?'

'Okay, so we ask Diamenti for three lizards.'

The Minstrel Boy was not sold on the idea of trekking on lizardback. 'Maybe we could do better than lizards. Wasn't Heet supposed to be keeping an eye on us?'

'He's outside waiting.'

The Minstrel Boy started pulling on his pants. 'So let's bring him in. I assume that he knows about this plan to split right now.'

'Oh, sure. I think he and his boss can't wait to see the back of us.'

'Maybe we can get a deal on something.'

Heet ducked through the entrance. He looked at the Minstrel Boy and Renatta and the messed-up bed. His expression was disapproving. The Minstrel Boy grinned, wondering how a Puritan managed to survive in a place like the Voice in the Wilderness.

'Greetings, Heet, I hope the old lycanthropy isn't acting up.'

Heet bared his steel fangs. 'You're a funny guy, Minstrel Boy. You wanna watch someone don't rip your sense of humor out.'

'Listen, Heet, you can speak for your boss, right?'

Heet nodded suspiciously. 'In most things.'

'So we need transportation out of here, and we were wondering if we could get a deal on some sort of rough-country ground vehicle.'

The yellow man tugged at a pointed ear. 'What you got to pay for it with?'

'I've got the balance on my submarine, and Reave could throw in his lizard.'

Heet gave him a baleful look. 'The sub was stolen from the Caverns.'

'That never bothered Diamenti in the past.'

'The lizard's probably stolen, too.'

'Can you make us a deal or not?'

Heet was thoughtful. 'There might be something I can do for you.'

'Yeah?'

'There's an old Saab battlewagon parked out on the terrace that might be in your price range. The previous owners died in a card game.'

Reave was suddenly interested. 'A Saab?'

'I'll even throw in the heat ray.'

Heet was turning into a bizarre salesman. The DNA Cowboys took the bait. Billy grinned.

'It sounds like us.'

Reave nodded. 'It does rather.'

The Minstrel Boy cinched the deal. 'I've seen it, and it looks okay.'

Reave faced Heet. 'You'll give it to us for the balance on the submarine and the lizard?'

Heet flashed the steel. 'Boss'll go along with that.'

He stuck out a hand. They shook in turn.

Renatta was dressing, pulling up her long red boots and smoothing them to the contours of her legs. 'So we're riding in a tank?'

'You have a problem with that?'

She ran a finger down her thigh. 'Hell, no. It seems sort of apt, and it's certainly better than riding a lizard.'

The deal done, they moved quickly. First there was the inspection of the battlewagon. While Heet was around, they complained bitterly about flaws, defects, and worn parts. And indeed they had some reason. When they started the drive, it crackled with plasma and leaked fluids. The biode was taciturn and easily irritated, and the previous owners had been far from fastidious. The interior of the vehicle was filthy, surfaces were thick with grime, and corners were solid with compacted garbage. The cabin stank of urine and decay. It was sufficiently bad that when Renatta insisted that the inside be cleaned out before they acceptthe craft, Heet did not complain and went off to find a couple of house epsilons to do the job. Once he was out of earshot there was a great deal of jubilation.

Reave was grinning. 'The DNA Cowboys have their own goddamn tank!'

Renatta was not altogether sold on the tank 'I thought you didn't call yourselves that.'

Reave was too pleased with their acquisition to pay her any mind. 'Whatever. We still got our own tank.' He climbed inside. 'The rest of it may look like shit, but the weapons systems have been perfectly maintained. The dead guys may have been pigs, but they were also heavy pros.'

The Minstrel Boy was drawing patterns in the dirt on the Saab's bodywork. 'If they were such heavyweights, how come they got killed over a card game?'

'Maybe they were playing with each other.'

Reave was going over the weapons, checking each gun port in turn, swiveling on the jockey stool, getting the feel of the twin particle throwers.

'Whoever looked after these babies really loved their work. We're talking firepower here. With something like this at the point, you could easily put a sizable raiding force behind you.'

The Minstrel Boy, who was getting his own feel of the biode, raised an eyebrow. 'I thought you'd had enough of that sort of thing.'

Reave looked torn. 'Yeah, I don't want to go off burning no towns. It just seems that everything's got so antsy out there that aggression's sometimes the only answer. There's always some bastard who wants to pick on you, so why not pick first? Besides, with all this firepower, it'd be good to have something to shoot at.'

Billy sighed. 'That's one way of looking at it.'

The Minstrel Boy turned in his seat. 'There's a difference between copping an attitude and sinking into barbarian twilight.'

Reave grunted. 'I'm not so sure that barbarian twilight ain't the next thing on the menu.'

Billy was already strapping himself into a passenger berth. 'Are we going to spend the next few hours talking philosophy, or are we going to get going?'

The Minstrel Boy engaged the drive. Blue smoke drifted through the cabin. Its hum had a harsh arrhythmic