sufficiency of their home. 'Right now we're using only a very small percentage of the power available to us. Jack and I could live off the land, hunting and harvesting crops if necessary, so this is a perfect place for us.'
'I didn't expect it to be so big.'
'Right now the house is over three thousand square feet. Jack and Briony have the larger wing. We've been working on a nursery for them. We share a kitchen, dining room, and great room with them, and our wing is on the other side. At the moment we have a bedroom, bath, and office, but I have a second bedroom roughed in. The garage nearly doubles the space, so we have plenty of room to expand if we want to, and if Jack and Briony keep it up, we'll have to very soon.' He flashed a small grin. 'They're expecting twins.'
'You never mentioned that.'
'I like to save the best for last.'
She smiled at him. 'That's kind of scary. Twins run in your family, do they?'
He nodded. 'Big time.'
She looked away from him back to the house. 'I love the logs. What are they?'
Ken didn't let his disappointment show. She wasn't ready for commitment. He had gotten her to his home in the Montana forest; he had to be happy with that and hope he could convince her to stay. 'Western white pine. We fitted them together with Swedish cope and used oil to finish them off. Jack made most of the furniture in the house. He's very good at woodworking.'
'It's beautiful. I love the porch.'
'The roof is built for warfare, and we have an escape tunnel. We have alarms and a few traps to let us know if unwanted visitors show up. The wood shop is just down there in that meadow, and the smaller garage houses the equipment. We have a vegetable garden in that little strip of land where the sun shines the most. Briony planted the flowers everywhere.'
Mari's hand gripped his. 'Is she here?'
'Don't sound so scared. No, Jack will bring her tomorrow. He wanted to see her first. He's protective of her.'
'He still doesn't quite trust me, does he?'
'Jack doesn't trust anything or anyone when it comes to Briony,' Ken said. 'She's his world, and if anything happened to her, he'd go berserk. She'll be here, honey, trust me; she's excited to know you're alive and well. Nothing is going to keep her from coming home.'
'Except Jack.'
'For a night. He wants her to himself tonight, and I was hoping we'd have a few hours together.'
Mari stood at the bottom of the steps looking at the wraparound verandah. The night was falling and the wind rustled through the trees. There was a bite of cold in the air. enough to make her shiver.
'Are you afraid of me, Mari?' Ken asked.
She lifted her hand to his face. As always, in the shadow of the night, the scarring faded away, leaving masculine perfection behind. 'No. Ken, it's not you.' She hesitated as if searching for the right words-or the trust she needed to expose her fears. 'It's me. I don't know anything about who I am or what I want. When I'm away from you, I feel as if I can't breathe without you. How can I ever learn to be complete if I go from never making a single decision on my own to being in such an intense relationship?' She looked stricken. 'I'm just taking it for granted that you want a relationship. You've never said. Not once.'
She retreated, stepping back away from him. away from the house. The forest, with all the gently swaying trees and thick foliage, seemed a refuge, something she knew, somewhere she could hide. She felt exposed and vulnerable and very confused.
'I'll say it now, Mari. I never want you to leave me. I want you more than I've ever wanted anything in my life. I can give you time-whatever you need.' Even as he said it, he didn't know if he was telling the truth. He wanted to give her time, to give her freedom, but there were limits to his abilities and he knew them better than most people.
She traced the outline of his lips. 'You're frowning.'
'I was lying. I can't lie to you like that. I'm not a perfect man, Mari. I want to be everything you need, but I can't watch you with other men while you figure out whether or not this relationship is the one you want.'
'Other men?' Her dark eyes glittered at him. 'What do other men have to do with this?'
'I don't want you looking to other men to help you figure things out.'
Her eyebrows drew together, and both hands clenched into fists. She glanced toward the forest again, then resolutely turned toward the house and stalked up the stairs to the porch to keep from hitting him. 'Other men? You have got to be out of your mind. Did you already forget where I came from?'
Mari paced across the porch, furious with him and herself. She'd put herself in a vulnerable position. She didn't belong here. She stole another look at the forest. She belonged there. She belonged with her sisters. She could trust them. They'd had a plan together, and she had deviated from the plan. She pressed her fingers to her suddenly throbbing temple. What had she done?
He cleared his throat, rubbed the bridge of his nose, and then shoved his hand through his hair in agitation. How the hell did men do this kind of thing on a daily basis? It was like walking through a minefield-one wrong step and everything would blow up in his face. 'You're right, that was stupid of me. I'm not doing this very well.'
'Get over being worried about me and other men, Ken,' she snapped.
He nodded. He'd have to find a way to curb his jealousy fast. She wasn't a woman to put up with it. There was no way to miss the clenched fist. 'Most women would have trouble with the solitude up here. In the winter, the road is impassable without snowmobiles. There aren't any phones. We have a radio of course, but not too many women want to be so isolated.'
Her gaze flicked to his face. 'Do I seem to you the kind of woman who has to be entertained all the time? I'm used to isolation.'
'Mari, I've never done this before. Never. I've never once brought a woman to this house or wanted a relationship with one. I may be making every mistake in the book here, but I'm trying to be honest, not judge you.'
'Never?'
'Never what?'
'You've never brought a woman here before?'
'This is my sanctuary, sweetheart. My home. I come here when the world closes in on me and I need to regroup. It's calm and peaceful and feels like home. You belong here; no one else ever has.'
'I don't really know what a home feels like.' She gestured toward the forest. 'I look at that and I feel like it's calling to me. I want to run free. Ken. Just run through the trees.' Her eyes met his. 'Could I do that?'
He tried to still his pounding heart. He knew better than to try to hold a wild bird, but he wanted to grab her with both hands. 'Of course. Tomorrow we'll get you a pair of running shoes. You can go out anytime you like. I prefer mornings, but it's beautiful all the time.'
She didn't reply, just stood staring at the beckoning trees.
Ken held out his hand to her. She might not be fully committed to a relationship with him. but he was with her. She looked right and felt right in his sanctuary. More than anything else, for all his uneasiness over what to say and do, he felt happy, really happy, just with her being on his property. All he had to do was rind a way to make her feel the same way.
Mari put her hand in his and reluctantly followed him to the solid door, trying not to show fear. 'How do you keep this house warm when it's snowing?'
'We use wood heat. We have very efficient fireplaces in the bedrooms, great room, and kitchen. We can close off each wing of the house so it's private and separate, or open them and have one large home.'
'And Briony lives here year round?' She latched onto that. She wanted to see Briony-just once. One time. She had lived with memories and fantasies about her twin for so long, she wanted to see her.
'We wouldn't leave her here alone if we were gone on a mission. Jack would never allow that.' The words slipped out before he could censor them.
Mari glanced at him sharply as she stepped across the threshold. '
'When it comes to Briony, we're very safety conscious. I imagine you will be as well. She's carrying twins, and Whitney has made several tries to take her. His last try cost us part of the house and one outer building, but the son of a bitch didn't get her.'
