Norwegian by Night

‘Outside. We’re going outside.’

‘I don’t have any keys to the house. I’m not autonomous.’

‘We’ll make you some. So what?’

‘When your father was little, he deliberately stopped matching his own clothes. It was an act of rebellion against his oppressive father. So we bought him nothing but Levis — the jeans named after a tribe of Israel that can magically match any top. Tie-dye, plaid, stripes, camouflage. You can throw anything at Levis. With this I out- manoeuvred your father. In return, we ended up with a child with no fashion sense.’

‘I think breakfast is over.’

‘He’s in the book, you know.’

‘I know, Papa.’

‘And your grandmother.’

‘I know.’

‘And a lot of angry Europeans.’

‘Yup.’

‘And a dog.’

‘Right-o.’

The book. ‘The book’ was Sheldon’s only verifiable claim to fame. In 1955, still a bit lost after the war and not much looking to be found, he somehow cottoned on to the idea of becoming a photographer. As it happened, he turned into a popular one. Long before thematic coffee books became the rage, Sheldon decided to travel and take portraits. Unfortunately, despite his talent with the camera, he lacked certain social graces — which was problematic, as taking portraits required willing subjects.

To Sheldon’s credit, however, he turned even this to his advantage by changing the subject of his portraits to unwilling subjects. In this, he demonstrated a certain penchant. And so, ‘Photos of Unwilling Subjects’ was the name of the project.

By 1956, Sheldon had collected exactly six hundred and thirteen photographs from twelve cities across five countries of people apoplectically angry at him. Over two hundred made it into the book. The rest remained in storage boxes that he guarded, hid, and never let anyone see. It wasn’t until Saul brought it up in conversation one time that anyone even suspected there were more photos. But even then Sheldon kept them hidden.

In the book, there were women screaming, men shaking their fists, children hysterical, and even dogs in mid-flight with their teeth bared. In his own graceless sarcasm, the book — which found an unusually fine publisher and no small audience — was entitled ‘What?’

In a brief interview with Harper’s, they asked what he did to make everyone so angry.

‘Whatever I could think of,’ he’d replied. ‘I pulled hair, teased kids, hassled dogs, tipped over ice-cream cones, heckled the elderly, left without paying, snatched cabs, cracked wise, walked off with other people’s luggage, insulted wives, complained to waiters, cut in line, tipped hats, and I didn’t hold the elevator for anyone. It was the best year of my life.’

Saul was on page one. Sheldon had just taken the toddler’s candy away, and then took photos of him with a flash that enraged him entirely. Mabel became livid, thereby earning herself a place on page two.

There is a copy of the book in Rhea’s living room. She has shown it to Lars. Their favourite photo is modelled on Doisneau’s ‘Kiss by the Hotel de Ville’ in Paris, which had only just been printed in Life magazine. Sheldon had intuited the photo’s iconic power of being a moment snatched from time during a period of change. In Sheldon’s version, two lovers have been interrupted during a kiss. They are gripping the iron railing of the bridge, and the woman is hurling a bottle of wine at the camera (technically, at Sheldon). It was a bright day, so Sheldon had used a small aperture-setting to capture a long depth of field, which managed to keep most of the scene in focus. The black-and-white photo — of superb composition — captured not only the angry face of the woman (her hand still extended from the throw, her face contorted, her body bent slightly over the railing as though hurling her very self at the camera), but also the vintage of the flying bottle (1948 Chateau Beychevelle, St Julien, Bordeaux). It was, genuinely, a brilliant photograph. And in 1994, when Doisneau admitted that his own photo had been staged (because the girl in it wanted some cash forty years on, and sued him, thereby forcing the photographer’s admission that she’d been hired, thus breaking the spell of the original photo), Sheldon went bananas and proclaimed himself the master.

‘The original was a fake, and the fake was an original!’ In 1995 his own photo was reissued, bringing him another week of notoriety and an opportunity to be incorrigible at family gatherings. This, for Sheldon, was a joy beyond description.

‘Get dressed. We’ll take a walk,’ Rhea says.

‘You two go. I’ll catch up.’

Lars looks up at Rhea, who glances back knowingly.

‘Papa, we want to tell you something about last night. Come with us.’

Sheldon looks at Lars, who is innocently placing a piece of herring on dark bread.

‘You don’t want me wandering around alone. You want me supervised. Which is why you want to strap that mobile phone on me. But I won’t have it!’

‘We like your company.’

‘Your grandmother was better at manipulating me than you two. I’m not giving in until you raise your game.’

‘Right, well, I’m going out. So who’s with me?’

Lars raises his hand.

‘Lars! Great! Anyone else?’ She looks around the room. ‘No one else?’

‘I have things to do,’ says Sheldon.

‘Like what?’

‘Private things.’

‘I don’t believe you.’

‘So what?’

‘It’s a nice day, and I want you out of the house.’

‘Did you know that I went through eight cameras making that book? Six were brutally smashed by the subjects — Mario’s was the first to go, one I dropped in the Hudson, and one was actually eaten by a dog. What I loved was how the dog blamed the camera and not me. The photo of the inside of his mouth is on page thirty- seven. And, of course, having pushed the button himself, the dog got the photo credit.’

‘What’s your point?’

‘It’s cute how you think I have a point.’

She scowls. Sheldon smiles. Lars announces he is going to get dressed. Breakfast is over.

Rhea is alone with Sheldon.

‘What’s with you? I said there was something I wanted to tell you.’

‘Go out with your husband. Go to the cabin. Make love on a fur blanket. Eat moose jerky. Drink akevitt that’s crossed the equator a few times. Two hundred years ago, we Jews wouldn’t have been allowed in this country. Now you’ve found a nice boy, and he loves you, and you’re going to have pretty babies. I’ll be here when you get back.’

‘Sometimes I think there’s an actual person in there with you, and then other times… I think it’s just you.’

‘Go get dressed and go. I’ll rinse my mug.’

Rhea’s arms are still crossed. She looks at Sheldon as though deciding something. And then, in a low voice touched with anger, she says, ‘I had a miscarriage.’

There is a deep silence from her grandfather, and his face settles. The muscles release, and for a moment she sees him in all his force. The years flow into him. A frightening weariness comes to his mouth and brow. She immediately regrets saying this. She should have stuck to her agreement with Lars. To break it slowly. To prepare the ground.

Sheldon stands quietly and wraps the robe around himself. And then, as though the tears were there all along, he walks back to his room and openly weeps alone.