you?' she said. 'You're very preachy about Anthony and me, aren't you? But didn't you put Elspeth in a vulnerable situation tonight, keeping her out in your car until the early hours?'
To her surprise, he laughed appreciatively. 'You're right, and I'm a pompous idiot,' he said. 'We all took risks.'
'That's the truth.' She shuddered. 'I don't know what I'd do if I got thrown out.'
'Study somewhere else, I guess.'
She shook her head. 'I'm on a scholarship. My father's dead, my mother's a penniless widow. And if I were expelled for moral transgression, I'd have little chance of getting another scholarship. Why do you look surprised?'
'To be honest, I'd have to say you don't dress like a scholarship girl.'
She was pleased he had noticed her clothes. 'It's the Leavenworth Award,' she explained.
'Wow.' The Leavenworth was a famously generous grant, and thousands of outstanding students applied for it 'You must be a genius.'
'I don't know about that,' she said, gratified by the respect in his voice. 'I'm not smart enough to make sure I have a place to stay the night'
'On the other hand, being thrown out of college is not the worst thing in the world. Some of the cleverest people drop out - then go on to become millionaires?
'It would be the end of the world for me. I don't want to be a millionaire, I want to help sick people get well.'
'You're going to be a doctor?'
'Psychologist I want to understand how the mind works.'
'Why?'
'It's so mysterious and complicated. Tilings like logic, the way we think. Imagining something that isn't there in front of us - animals can't do that. The ability to remember - fish have no memory, did you know that?'
He nodded. 'And why is it that just about everyone can recognize a musical octave?' he said. 'Two notes, the frequency of one being double that of the other -how come your brain knows that?'
'You find it interesting, too!' She was pleased that he shared her curiosity.
'What did your father die of?'
Billie swallowed hard. Sudden grief overwhelmed her. She struggled against tears. It was always like this, a chance word, and from nowhere came a sorrow so acute she could barely speak.
'I'm really sorry,' Luke said. 'I didn't mean to upset you.'
'Not your fault,' she managed. She took a deep breath. 'He lost his mind. One Sunday morning he went bathing in the Trinity River. The thing is, he hated the water, and he couldn't swim. I think he wanted to die. The coroner thought so too, but the jury took pity on us and called it an accident, so that we'd get the life insurance. It was a hundred dollars. We lived on that for a year.' She took a deep breath. 'Let's talk about something else. Tell me about math.'
'Well.' He thought for a moment 'Math is as weird as psychology,' he said. 'Take the number pi. Why should the ratio of circumference to diameter be three point one four two? Why not six, or two and a half? Who made that decision, and why?'
'You want to explore outer space.'
'I think it's the most exciting adventure mankind has ever had.'
'And I want to map the mind.' She smiled. The grief of bereavement was leaving her. 'You know we have something in common - we both have big ideas.'
He laughed, then braked the car. 'Hey, we're coming to a crossroads.'
She switched on the flashlight and looked at the map on her knee. 'Turn right,' she said.
They were approaching Newport. The time had passed quickly. She felt sorry the trip was coming to an end. 'I have no idea what I'm going to tell my cousin,' she said.
'What's he like?'
'He's queer.'
'Queer? In what way?'
'In the homosexual way.'
He shot her a startled look. 'I see.'
She had no patience with men who expected women to tiptoe around the subject of sex. 'I've shocked you again, haven't I?'
He grinned at her. 'As you would say - that's the truth.'
She laughed. It was a Texan colloquialism. . She was glad he noticed little things about her.
There's a fork in the road,' he said.
She consulted the map again. 'You'll have to pull up, I can't find it.'
He stopped the car and leaned across to look at the map in the light of the flash. He reached out to turn the map-a little, and his touch was warm on her cold hand. 'Maybe we're here,' he said, pointing.
Instead of looking at the map, she found herself staring at his face. It was deeply shadowed, lit only by the moon and the indirect torchlight. His hair fell forward over his left eye. After a moment he felt her gaze, and glanced up at her. Without thinking, Billie lifted her hand and stroked his cheek with the outside edge of her little finger. He stared back at her, and she saw bewilderment and desire in his eyes.
'Which way do we go?' she murmured.
He moved away suddenly and put the car in gear. 'We take...' He cleared his throat 'We take the left fork.'
Billie wondered what the hell she was doing. Luke had spent the evening smooching with the most beautiful girl on campus. Billie had been out with Luke's room-mate. What was she thinking about?
Her feelings for Anthony had not been strong, even before tonight's calamity. All the same, she was dating him, so she certainly should not be toying with his best friend.
'Why did you do that?' Luke said angrily.
'I don't know,' she said. 'I didn't intend to, it just happened. Slow down.'
He took a bend too fast. 'I don't want to feel like this about you!' he said.
She was suddenly breathless. 'Like what?'
'Never mind.' -
The smell of the sea came into the car, and Billie realized they were close to her cousin's home. She recognized the road. 'Next left,' she said. 'If you don't slow down you'll miss it'
Luke braked and turned on to a dirt road.
Half of Billie wanted to arrive at the destination and get out of the car and leave -behind this unbearable tension. The other half wanted to drive with Luke for ever.
'We're here,' she said.
They stopped outside a neat one-storey frame house with gingerbread eaves and a lamp by the door. The Ford's headlights picked out a cat sitting motionless on a windowsill, looking at them with a calm gaze, disdainful of the turmoil of human emotion.
'Come in,' Billie said. 'Denny will make some coffee to keep you awake on the return trip.'
'No, thanks,' he said. I'll just wait here until you're safely inside.'
You've been very kind to me. I don't think I deserve it' She held out her hand to shake.
'Are we friends?' he said, taking her hand.
She lifted his hand to her face, kissed it, and pressed it against her cheek, closing her eyes. After a moment she heard him groan softly. She opened her eyes and found him staring at her. His hand moved behind her head, he pulled her to him, and they kissed. It was a gentle kiss, soft lips and warm breath and his fingertips light on the back of her neck. She held the lapel of his rough tweed coat and pulled him closer. If he grabbed her now, she would not resist, she knew. The thought made her burn with desire. Feeling wild, she took his lip between her teeth and bit.
She heard Denny's voice. 'Who's out there?'
She pulled away from Luke and looked out There were lights on in the house, and Denny stood in the doorway, wearing a purple silk dressing gown.
She turned back to Luke. 'I could fall in love with you in about twenty minutes,' she said. 'But I don't think we
