Bryant & May 04; Ten Second Staircase

who would creep up to them, mutter indecencies, and then stab their buttocks with a thin, sharp instrument.

“‘The Bow Street runners failed to catch him, so a wealthy Lloyds insurance broker called John Julius Angertstein offered a reward of fifty pounds for his capture. The money encouraged false accusations and vigilante attacks as passersby hysterically screamed ‘The Monster!’ at anyone they didn’t like the look of.

“‘Such a sense of panic settled over the capital that the lives of innocent men were endangered. Fashionable women were encouraged to wear copper-plated petticoats to protect themselves from attack. After over fifty females had been assaulted, a young artificial-flower maker called Rhynwick Williams was arrested when one of the more unstable victims pointed him out to a vigilante. He was convicted after a couple of ridiculous show trials, despite the fact that he had a cast-iron alibi for one of the worst outrages.

“‘The London Monster wasn’t alone; the Hammersmith Monster also scratched lonely women, and despite being caught and committed for trial, he seems to have reappeared eight years later for further attacks. By now, though, he had been branded a ‘ghost’, appearing in a large white dress with long claws.

“‘This version has an interesting coda: One hundred years later, in 1955, he acquired a retroactive history via the West London Observer, which stated that he appeared every fifty years in St Paul’s churchyard when the moon was full. He walked between the tombstones with blazing eyes, wrapped in a white winding sheet. At the date of his next visitation, four hundred ghost-hunters turned up in the churchyard. The police were forced to seal off the area until midnight, when the ghost was due to walk, but nothing happened. Then someone remembered that British Summer Time had made the visitation an hour late, so the crowd stayed on, and were rewarded with the sight of a ghostly floating creature in brilliant white, with no legs, rising on a strange wind and drifting from the church porch into one of the tombs. The legend was now complete.’” She slammed the diary shut. “In fact, he’s due to walk again this very month.”

“So you’re saying that these London myths are created by fearful populations rather than the villains themselves?” asked May, trying to understand.

“Obviously there has to be a defining action at the start,” said Maggie, “but remember what happened when the News of the World released information concerning convicted paedophiles to their readers: rioting, hysteria, mob violence. It’s not just an English phenomenon. Look at Nancy Reagan and the ‘Just Say No’ campaign that had parents submitting their children to drug tests. In Lagos, Nigerians started believing that they could be killed by answering specifically numbered calls on mobiles after midnight. And the London Ambulance Service recently fell for the old story about gang members driving without car headlights, believing that if they flashed the oncoming cars to warn them, they would be shot dead as part of an initiation ceremony. Scaremongering panics like these surface regularly, only to be debunked as nonsense before rising again.”

“But the Highwayman has actually killed two people.”

“Look at his victims: objects of hatred, misunderstanding, and public ridicule by the middle-aged middle classes. Think of vilified TV comics whose careers nose-dive after scandals. The public reaction: ‘No smoke without fire.’ Worst fears are confirmed: ‘I always felt there was something odd about him.’ But if the public figure is admired, the public is prepared to overlook faults. The politicians and actors we know to be gay will be accepted if they show themselves to be honest people. Politicians with murky histories and an inability to speak plainly – one thinks of Michael Howard, Mark Thatcher, Jeffrey Archer, and that ghastly ex-politician with the publicity-mad wife – are subject to confirmed suspicions and receive no aid. Those who remove objects of public suspicion are therefore in a position to become celebrities.”

“Good God, does this mean we have to start protecting every disliked celebrity and parliamentary member in the city?” asked May. “We’d never be able to do it.”

“Exactly. The Highwayman has found himself a perfect modus operandi. He’s impervious to anticipation. And no doubt he’s relying on the fact that we will never be able to follow his game plan, assuming he has one.”

“So you don’t think he’s randomly picking victims according to his own temperamental outbursts?”

“No. The acts are far too premeditated to make me believe he has no plan. He craves popular support. He won’t attack anyone the public truly admires.”

“That still doesn’t help us.”

“Perhaps not, but it helps to build a profile of the person we’re searching for. The case histories of the past always shed light on the present.”

“But we’re not talking about hysterical outbreaks in Mayfair – these are perverse, clever cruelties.”

“I agree that the attacks differ in one crucial aspect,” said Bryant. “They’re not designed to frighten the public but to reassure them; to prove that someone is on their side, acting on their behalf. The Leicester Square Vampire fits the former category. He inspired fear, clearing the streets at night by reminding everyone that they were vulnerable. His acts were unfathomable, possibly politically driven, but it’s likely that the Vampire himself had no explanation for his actions. Our Highwayman is of a different psychological make-up. He’s unemotional, an insider, a calculator of odds, above average intelligence, multifaceted, perhaps even a split personality. But he wants to be seen as a champion. And we haven’t seen the last of him.”

“How can you be so sure?”

“There are always more than two items on any plotted agenda.”

“So the Leicester Square Vampire had no agenda?”

“Hard to tell, but he appears to have been operating over an unusually long time scale. April, are you serious about sightings dating back to the middle of the eighteenth century?”

“There are listings with descriptions here, but you know what the Internet is like; UFO sightings are given the same weight as accepted historical truths. It’s as much a source of rumour as it is of factual reference.”

“We still have to close his case before Faraday and Kasavian can use it to shut us down,” said Bryant. “I suppose we could reexamine the physical evidence, open the bodies of his victims, and arrange for Longbright to visit his survivors – although I should think their memories will prove unhelpful after all this time.”

For once, May gleaned a practical purpose in talking to the white witch. He began to see how Bryant connected people and events, across decades and districts, through history and hardship, applying their shared tragedies to the present problem. “Fair enough,” he agreed. “We’ll divide the unit staff into two groups. You lead the cold case, I’ll take over on the Highwayman. We share the information, and if either team hits an impasse, we agree to swap investigations. Meanwhile, we stay out of Faraday’s way as much as possible. And if anything goes wrong, you do what I tell you.”

“It’s a deal,” said Bryant, eagerly shaking his partner’s hand.

“I still can’t believe you gave away my birthday present,” said May, shaking his head in wonderment.

? Ten Second Staircase ?

27

English Cruelties

His real name was Alexander Garfield Paradine, and he was related to the Earl of Devonshire, but everyone called him Garfy, and thought he was the son of a taxi driver who had been discovered in a Skegness talent competition.

You needed the common touch to succeed on television; it levelled the playing field between you and the viewer. While his fans imagined that he drank at his local and ate in chip shops, he had been dining at the Groucho Club and hooking slices at Sunningdale. It was part of the pact to allow them their dreams, that they too might one day become like him.

He’d been lucky in the early years, becoming an alternative comedian without having to haul a one-man show around Edinburgh for several festivals. He’d become popular on the university circuit, garnering a strong student following, but he longed for a wider audience, and as his career shifted from late-night cult shows to Saturday evening clip-fests like You’re on Camera, the pact with his youthful fan base had become strained. His privacy was repeatedly invaded by viewers who felt they owned him. They clambered over the wall of his house in Henley-on-Thames, and followed his wife back from Waitrose, photographing her on their mobiles.

To reduce the pressure, he reinvented himself, but by the time he was cutting his teeth on dramatic soaps like Manchester Emergency, his fans had turned on him. No-one, neither critics nor audiences, was prepared to accept him as a serious actor. Taking a role in the BBC’s prestigious two-parter