The Desert Lord’s Bride

poisoning the world more, not to mention muddying my own karma.”

He clamped his jaw on the need to pulverize her reticence, wanting her to give him carte blanche to remove the vultures from her path once and for all.

He wrestled the urge down, if only by coming to a decision that he would do it, if with less-than-harsh methods to honor her choice. He still couldn’t stop himself from saying, “I will keep on hoping that you’ll change your mind, let me use my…discretion in dealing with them. Until then, they’re coming nowhere near you. We won’t go back to your home. And I certainly won’t take you to a hotel. Come be with me, ya jameelati.”

After a stunned moment, she stammered, “I know I gave you the impression-hell, I asked you to-to…but I really am out of my depth here, Shehab.”

“I’m not asking you to come to my place to share my bed. I said we’d go slow, and we will, as slow as we need to. I’m offering my protection and hospitality as long as you need it.”

“Oh, God, Shehab, I don’t think…”

“How about you stop thinking for a while?”

She squeezed her eyes shut. “But that’s the problem. I stopped thinking at all since I met you.”

His fingers feathered her eyes open. “And why is that such a bad thing? The past hours have been a roller coaster. Take the next, and all the time you stay at my place, to settle down, relax, enjoy my company, savor me as I intend to savor you.”

“But I have to…to…I don’t know what I have to do, OK? Whatever it is, I can’t do it with you around. Please, Shehab, just take me home. I need to wrap my head around tonight, around what happened between us, the way I-I…”

And she fell silent.

He was losing her. She was coming to her senses. He couldn’t afford to let her. He had to move into a higher gear.

He slipped his cell phone out of his pocket, gave a twofold order. The first part was another improvisation in his plan. He told her the second part. “I ordered the plane to land.”

She nodded, looked anywhere but at him. He put the phone on the couch between them, gritted his teeth and counted down…

A buzz went through her. It took her seconds to realize it wasn’t another jolt of awareness. It was his phone’s vibration.

He answered it unhurriedly, his eyes on her.

After the first seconds his eyes shifted away and his face closed. Her heart contracted. Bad news? Personal?

He bit off a string of Arabic before he snapped the phone shut. She watched him with a thudding heart as he placed it on the table before them, his moves deliberate, as if to delay a reaction to something big. And bad.

Then he finally sought her eyes and her heart lurched. “An unforeseen crisis has blown apart the business deal I mentioned earlier.”

She stared at him, held her breath, hoping he’d elaborate. Next second she wished she hadn’t hoped. She should have known whatever she hoped for would happen in reverse.

He went on. “I can’t predict how long it will take to perform damage control, to reestablish matters. Weeks. Maybe months.”

“Oh.” That was all she could say.

What was there to say when he was telling her it had been too good to go any further? He’d go back home, for weeks, maybe months. And he’d forget all about her.

It was over before it had even begun.

Five

“So-this is goodbye?”

Farah heard the disembodied voice. It was hers.

Shehab looked away, his face an empty mask now. “I guess it is.” After a moment’s crushing silence he added, “I would have asked to see you after I’ve dealt with the crisis, but I guess there’s no point anymore.”

Her heart twisted. So she’d still been hoping that he’d contest her verdict. But he was too truthful to say something he didn’t mean, even for courtesy’s sake. He knew he’d forget her in that time, probably thought it would be good riddance anyway.

But what had she expected? Her behavior might have intrigued him at first, or at least entertained him. But after her candidness and abandon had turned to agitation and accusation, after she’d behaved like an insecure fool wrapped in a moronic virgin following her impression of a nymphomaniac hours ago, too, it must have been a major turnoff to him, a man of a level of sophistication and self-possession she hadn’t dreamed existed.

But he’d still been so accommodating, so patient, had tried to talk her down from her unreasonable state, tolerated her yo-yoing moods, up until she’d turned down his offer of sanctuary.

She’d wanted to hide until she came to terms with what he’d made her feel, want, do. But she hadn’t turned down his offer, had only been postponing accepting until she was ready.

She’d thought she’d be ready tomorrow.

Now there would be no tomorrow. Now she would have nothing. Nothing but the memories of this unbelievable man and night. And the discoveries about herself she’d been mercifully oblivious to. At least her previous resignation to her status quo, her ignorance of what she was capable of feeling had resembled peace.

But as usual, she had no say in anything. He’d disappear from her life and she couldn’t do anything about it.

There was one thing she could do, though. Give him his dues, tell him how she wished she’d used their precious time better and given him as fond memories of her as he’d given her of him.

“Shehab, I want to tell you how sorry I am, for everything-” He raised one hand in a cutting gesture. “OK, so you don’t want to hear it, but I have to say it. You gave me a night out of time, one nothing will ever come close to touching in my life, and I gave you only a headache in return.”

He snapped his eyes back to her then, the harshness there directed at her, no doubt. “You’ve been so incredibly candid so far, so please, don’t you start acting now.”

“Acting?”

“Yes, to assume the blame for how things have turned out, so you’ll soften the blow. I won’t pretend it is a disappointment I can come to terms with, as it isn’t and I can’t. But please don’t add insult to injury and think you need to placate me now. It’s your right to change your mind at any point.”

“You’re the one who changed your mind.” Her voice quavered.

He shot to his feet. “I did no such thing.”

“But you said there was no point in looking me up anymore.”

“Only because you’ve made it clear you don’t want to see me. And since you seem horrified by what you let happen between us, after your earlier doubts, I don’t want to give them credence by imposing my desire where it isn’t wanted, adding the charges of stalking and harassment to…” He stopped, stared at her as she gaped at him. Then his stiff face broke into slow elation that made her feel like the sun had broken through barricades of clotted clouds and a heavenly orchestra had broken out to fill the world with poignancy and beauty. “You weren’t telling me you didn’t want to see me again?”

“If I in any way implied that, then my communication skills, as stunted as they are, have totally disintegrated.”

Something tight, watchful, still hovered in his gaze. “But you said you wanted to go home.”

“I only wanted to go home tonight. I was hoping to be with you again tomorrow, when I hoped also to have retrieved my misplaced balance and borrowed some much-needed discretion.”

And the tension in his eyes, his stance, disappeared as he leaned closer until he had her imprisoned between his arms, lowered his head to hers until his breath singed her cheek, her jaw. “I pray no one ever lends you any. In fact, I’ll do whatever it takes to ensure no one does. You captivate me with your frankness, you elate me with your