Bride By Choice

marry him, but then Renato and I fell in love.

‘But what could we do? The wedding was only a few days away. How could we tell Lorenzo? Luckily he sensed the truth, and had the courage to walk out of the cathedral and save us all from disaster. It was terrible at the time, but Renato and I will be grateful to him all our lives for leaving us free to marry.’

‘But-’ Helen couldn’t go on.

‘You heard Sara’s version, highly coloured for revenge. What else did she say?’

‘That Baptista arranged your marriage.’

‘Oh, she did. Renato and I were left floundering, at odds with each other, not knowing what to say. We might still be floundering if she hadn’t found a way to settle things, but it was a love match for all that.’

‘You weren’t pining for Lorenzo?’

‘Not for a moment.’

Helen said the next words with difficulty. ‘When Lorenzo went to England and called you-Sara said you promised to be with him that night.’

‘I had to. He called me in a panic to say he’d been arrested, and I promised to be there by evening to bail him out. But when I got there they wouldn’t let him out in case he left the country, so he had to sleep in the cell.’

‘But why was he arrested?’

‘He was driving a fraction over the limit, and when a policeman stopped him he took a swing at him. Actually he barely touched him. Even the policeman admitted that in court next morning. And there was no accident, nobody hurt. The magistrate fined him and told him not to be such an idiot another time. Then we fled the country as fast as we could, and were back here later that day. I’m sure Sara made it sound like a lovers’ assignation, but actually it was that incident that really made us brother and sister. Lorenzo says I nagged him all the way home, without pausing for breath.’

‘Oh, heavens!’ Helen buried her face in her hands. ‘I’ve been such a fool.’

‘No, Lorenzo has been a fool. He should have told you everything, but that’s his way-put it off and hope for the best. At least, that’s how he used to be. These days I’m not so sure.’

‘You two always seemed so close-’

‘We are close. I love him dearly-as a brother. And there’s a special bond between people who have nearly married and then didn’t.’

Helen’s smile was sad. She had neither seen nor heard from Lorenzo since that day. He had taken her to the hotel, bid her a courteous goodbye, and driven off. The next morning her bags were delivered. Since then, silence. Well, what else had she expected?

The year was closing in, but Palermo remained a pleasant place where it was possible to eat at the pavement cafes even in December. Helen decided to remain where she was for Christmas and immure herself in her hotel apartment, concentrating on a thousand problems, including the big one that still plagued her-how to get huge publicity for the hotel’s February opening.

The management back in New York had insisted on this unlikely date so that the name of the Elroy Palermo could establish itself before the summer. They were expecting Axel Roderick to open with something spectacular, but so far he hadn’t thought of the crucial idea. Nor had she, and time was pressing.

Sometimes, late at night, she would close her office and stroll across to her two room apartment. She would listen to her own footsteps in the darkened building, and consider how far she had come since that day, nearly a year ago, when she had returned from Boston to New York, eager to complete her training and become a successful businesswoman.

She’d done it. She had power, authority, and a large salary. Her word was listened to with respect and no family demands tied her down. She had everything she’d always wanted.

But she was alone.

Her ambitions had never included that, because she couldn’t have anticipated meeting the man who’d combined love and laughter and left an impression on her heart that she couldn’t erase. From her apartment window she could just make out the lights of Mondello harbour, where the Santa Maria lay. And Lorenzo’s words seemed to echo about her.

‘-what you never thought of was that I belonged to you-I loved you more than I’ve ever loved anyone, or ever will again-better if we had never met- All that is at an end between us-’

He’d offered her friendship, but friendship could never be enough. She knew, now it was too late, that she loved him more than life. She wanted to belong to him in the equal compact of belonging that he’d spoken of. But he no longer wanted her.

All that is at an end between us.

One afternoon when the chatter of voices grew too much for her, she slipped out of the hotel for some fresh air and went walking down by the harbour. She didn’t mean to head for the Santa Maria, but somehow her feet found their way there, and stopped so that she could look wistfully at the bobbing single tall mast.

‘Helen, how good to see you?’

She looked around to see Bernardo, smiling.

‘How are you?’ she asked politely.

‘Better than ever in my life before.’

‘Congratulations on your baby.’

‘You haven’t seen her yet, have you? That’s terrible. Come with me to Montedoro now.’

‘Oh, I don’t think-’

‘Of course you must. I’ll drive you back afterwards.’

He was steering her towards his car, his hand tucked firmly under her arm. It would be pleasant to see Angie, whom she’d always liked.

As they climbed the mildness of the coastal climate fell away, and when Montedoro appeared just up ahead, its roofs were white with a light dusting of snow. Soon they had reached the beautiful old house with its courtyard and fountain, where Bernardo had been born and spent the first twelve years of his life. As they made their way through the courtyard Angie’s face appeared at the window.

‘I’ve brought someone to see you,’ Bernardo said, kissing his wife.

Angie embraced her warmly and Helen said, ‘I’m longing to see your little baby.’

‘She’s just through there,’ Angie said, pointing behind. ‘But Helen-’

‘What? Did I come at a bad time?’

Angie seemed to make a decision. ‘No, you came at a perfect time. Just go through.’

She pointed the way to the comfortable main room, and Helen went ahead. But on the threshold she stopped.

‘Hello,’ Lorenzo said.

He was sitting by the fire, the baby in his arms. In the split second before he looked up Helen took in the whole picture, the unselfconscious way he held the child, smiling into her face. It flashed across her mind that she’d never seen anything so delightful.

Then his face seemed to close against her. His smile faded, replaced by a polite formality that shut her out.

‘Hello,’ he said again.

‘I-thought you were in Spain.’

‘I got back yesterday. I had to come and visit my niece.’

‘I met Bernardo and he insisted on bringing me to see Helen and the baby.’

A touch of warmth returned to his face. ‘She’s a charmer. Come and see.’

He indicated the place on the sofa beside her and when she’d sat down he gently placed the infant in her lap.

‘How are you with babies?’ he said.

‘You ask me that? With all the relations I’ve got?’

‘Me, too. I’ve been practising for years.’

They exchanged cautious smiles.

‘What’s her name?’ Helen asked.