to his changes of mind, warding her off defensively one moment, drawing her close the next, then warding her off again. It was possible to cope, now that she understood.
She called home night and morning, looking forward to her gurgled conversations with Danny, picturing his face, so like that of his great-grandfather that she almost told Sue to bring him out here at once.
But not just yet. There lingered in her mind the memory of Renzo saying that his knowledge of family life had scarred him too much to make him a good father. His recent experiences were unlikely to have changed his view. Yet the time was coming when she must take the chance.
One morning, while she was working in Ferrini’s house, feeling in dire need of coffee, she went across the hall to the kitchen and just noticed a figure in the shadows, who retreated at once.
‘Luigi?’ she called. ‘Why are you hiding? Don’t say you’re afraid of me.’
‘Not you,’ he muttered, emerging. ‘Him.’
‘Him? Who?’
‘Renzo. I don’t want to be a dead man.’
‘Don’t be absurd.’
‘You don’t know what he said he’d do to me if I troubled you.’ Luigi looked around as though fearful that Renzo would be watching them.
‘I seem to remember it was me threatening you, not him,’ Mandy said.
‘No, after that. He called me and said I must stay away from you.’
‘He did
‘I know the difference between a man who’s protective and a man who’s jealous to the point of murder.’ Luigi eyed her cautiously. ‘I guess he’s not such a dead man.’ He retreated back into the shadows. ‘Don’t tell him we talked. I’m not ready to die.’
She smiled at his comical tone, but she was thoughtful for the rest of the day. That evening she refused the car and walked for a while, not looking where she was going, sunk in thought until she found a bench. There she sat down, took out the photograph of Danny that never left her and gazed at it longingly, missing him so much that she ached.
At last she put it safely away, then took her cellphone and called home to England.
‘I don’t suppose Danny’s awake?’ she asked hopefully.
‘I’ve only just got him to sleep,’ Sue told her. ‘Do you want me to wake him? It would be better not to. He’s been a bit upset today. He keeps saying “Mummy” and I tell him he’ll see Mummy soon.’
‘He will,’ Mandy said firmly. ‘I’ve waited long enough. Now it’s time for action. Don’t wake him now, but call me tomorrow morning.’
It was late when she went home. Teresa was in the hall.
‘He’s waiting for you,’ she said quietly.
As she went into the living room Renzo was standing there.
‘Where have you been?’ he demanded. ‘I’ve been worried. You might have got lost.’
‘No, I wasn’t lost. I had things to think about, and decide.’
‘And what have you decided?’ he asked, sounding tense.
‘This,’ she said simply, and reached up to kiss him.
She felt the shock go through his body and the next instant his arms were around her, drawing her fiercely against him, telling her with every movement that she was doing the right thing.
‘Mandy,’ he said hoarsely. ‘Tell me-’
‘No,’ she murmured. ‘No more talk. We’ve talked too much. Kiss me.’
He responded with a vigour that told her he’d wanted this as much as she had. No caution now, no holding back, only a desperate seeking of the dream before it vanished.
But it wasn’t going to vanish, she promised him with every caress. It was here for him for ever. Her lips, her hands, her heart told him. As for herself, she’d waited two years for this moment, and nothing was going to take it from her now.
‘You’re doing something dangerous,’ he murmured huskily.
‘There’s pleasure in going to the edge, remember?’ she reminded him. ‘We’ve been to the edge before, but we went over apart and we paid for it. This time we’re going over together, and we’re going to be rulers of the world, just as you said.’
He looked at her intently. ‘Do you mean that?’ he asked, half hopeful, half not wanting to hope.
‘If we don’t, there’s nothing else.’
Now she saw something in his eyes that thrilled her. Time had rolled back and he was once more a man alight with an inner fire. His grasp on her hands was tight, drawing her out of the room. At the foot of the stairs he kissed her again, then watched her, waiting for something.
Now it was she who took control. ‘Come with me,’ she said.
‘To the top of the mountain?’
‘Where else?’
‘And then-’
She gave a laugh of pure triumph. ‘Then,’ she said, ‘we’re going to hold hands and jump.’
CHAPTER NINE
THE lights were out in his room, but the shutters stood open, letting in a soft blue glow.
‘Don’t look at me,’ Renzo said.
Mandy was about to protest that his damaged appearance didn’t repel her, but she decided that actions would be better than words. And there was another reason, one that attracted her even more.
‘Remember the darkness?’ she asked him as she drew the shutters closed, blocking out the light. ‘There was snow on every side of the hut except the side that was missing. It blocked out all the light, so that we had to use a torch sometimes, and at other times we managed without light.’
‘I remember. And the cold.’
‘We huddled under blankets and kept warm together.’
‘It wasn’t cold when you were there. You drove it away.’
She took his hand and laid the fingers on her buttons, letting him know what she wanted. He began to undress her slowly and she felt his fingertips just brushing her skin. The very lightness of that touch drove her wild. She wanted more, and then more. She wanted everything from him, but she forced herself to be patient, though it was hard when she could sense the time coming.
He drew her close, so that her breasts touched his skin, and she felt him tremble. For a while they held each other like that, exchanging warmth and comfort as much as desire. He dropped his head onto her shoulder, which was not easy as she was so much shorter.
‘You’re so tiny,’ he murmured.
‘Delicate,’ she teased softly.
He gave a choke of laughter. ‘Yes, delicate.’
She drew back the duvet and they lay down, hurriedly removing the rest of their clothes and tossing them onto the floor.
‘We did this last time,’ she reminded him, ‘and we had to use the torch to find them the next morning.’
‘We couldn’t see anything,’ he said. ‘I held you safe, because I was afraid if I let go, you’d vanish. Don’t vanish now.’
‘Here I am.’
‘I remember this,’ he whispered, trailing his fingers over her breasts, down to her tiny waist. ‘And you sighed as though you loved it.’
‘Mmm, yes, I did. And there was something you loved too-I know that because I was exploring, trying to find what pleased you-this?-or this?-or perhaps a little differently, and I must have got it right because you suddenly yelled-’
