there, and
'Yes,' she said sadly. 'I do see. And you're right.'
'Well then -'
'My darling, please try to understand. I see everything you want me to see. But I can't do it.'
Silence. Only the lapping of the water against the boat. His face was sadder than any human being's she had ever seen.
At last he released her and started the engine again. Soon they were skimming across the water. Gradually the airport came into sight, growing larger every moment, until he slowed and eased into the jetty.
In a few minutes she would be gone, and everything would be over. Her heart was breaking, but she had no idea how to stop what was happening.
Chapter Twenty
Riccardo carried her bags from the boat to the airport buildings and piled them onto a trolley.
'I'll say goodbye now,' he said briefly.
'Won't you come with me to the check-in?'
'There's no need.'
'You can't wait to get away from me.'
'I thought it was you going away from me.'
Justine made a helpless gesture. She was beyond speech.
'Listen,
'Don't say that,' she cried passionately. 'You know I love you.'
'But it isn't enough, is it? Too many ghosts haunt you, and I can't dispel them. I wish I could, because now I, too, have a ghost that will haunt me all my life.'
'Venice is a city of ghosts,' she reminded him. 'You taught me that.'
'Yes, but I didn't want you to be a ghost. I wanted you to be my reality. Instead, you'll be a 'might-have-been,' and that's the worst kind of ghost there is.'
She nodded. She couldn't deny it. But neither could she stop what was happening. It was like being carried on by the irresistible tide that flowed through the lagoon.
'So,' he went on, 'I won't come any further. I won't watch you get onto the plane, and wave as it vanishes into the sky, because I couldn't bear to.'
'It isn't that I don't love you,' she said huskily. 'Please believe me. It's just that I can't take any more risks.'
'What do you mean 'any more'?' he asked with sudden anger. 'You've never taken a risk in your life. Even your marriage was hedged around with safety barriers, and they were what destroyed it.
'Do you remember my saying that if you jumped into my boat a third time you'd have to marry me? Do it now. Risk it. Take that third leap, and find my arms outstretched to catch you. Because they always will be.'
'I know,' she choked. 'But it's how I am. I can't help it.'
'Then there's no hope for us?'
She shook her head.
'Goodbye,
He took her face between his hands and kissed her with a tenderness that broke her heart.
'Goodbye, goodbye,' he whispered.
She clung to him, wanting to prolong the moment forever, but unable to change her mind.
He walked away from her toward the jetty. She waited for him to look back, telling herself that until he did that, it wasn't over.
But he didn't look back, and she realized that he wouldn't do so. He wasn't sentimental, just a man with a powerful, loving heart that she had rejected.
She began to push the trolley toward the check-in, but every step seemed forced.
She had made her decision and must stick with it.
Even if the rest of her life was desolate. And it would be.
That wasn't a risk. It was a certainty.
Not anymore.
In a few moments he would be gone forever. It only needed a little courage and a lot of faith.
She looked around wildly. It was almost too late. She began to run. Outside she could see the water and the queues waiting for motor taxis.
He was there, just getting into the motorboat, starting it up.
'Riccardo!' she screamed. 'Riccardo, wait for me.'
But he couldn't hear her. The noise of his engine drowned her out. She began to run, frantic as she saw the precious chance slipping away.
The boat was drawing away, but at the last moment something made him look back. Justine saw his face, alight with love and joy as he realized what she meant to do.
'Wait for me, my love. I'm coming. I'm coming!'
The onlookers parted to let her through. She sped the last few feet and took a flying leap off the jetty, soaring high into the air before falling into the arms that were outstretched to receive her forever.
Lucy Gordon