'I'm… I'm sorry,' he muttered at last.
She let out a strangled oath and turned away from him.
He hesitated, then slipped in beside her. He crossed his arms behind his head and stared up at the ceiling, wishing he were drunker, wishing fervently he could go to sleep.
But he lay awake a long, long time. And he knew she didn't sleep, either.
At dawn he rose and left.
And at dawn Kristin finally slept. She had the right to stay in bed all day, she told herself bitterly. She was a bride, and this was the morning after her wedding day.
Cole wasn't in the house when she finally did get up. Shannon told her he had gone out with Malachi.
Jamie was there, though. He told her that they were low on salt and that they needed a couple of blocks for the cattle to lick through the winter. Cole had said that she and Pete were to go into town and buy them.
The Union had control of most of the border area — despite Quant rill's sporadic raids — and the town had managed to remain quieter than the McCahy ranch. Kristin was glad to take the buckboard and ride into town with Pete. She was glad to be away from the house.
It was a three-hour ride. The town of Little Ford was small, but it did have two saloons, one
reputable hotel, two doctors old enough to be exempted from military service and three mercantile stores. In Jaffe's Mercantile she saw Tommy Norley, a newspaperman and an old friend of Adam's from over the Kansas border.
'Kristin!'
He was limping when he came over to her. He tipped his hat quickly, then took both her hands in his. 'Kristin, how are you doing out there? Is everything all right? You and Shannon should have moved on, I think. Or maybe into town. Or maybe out to California!'
She smiled. He was a slim man, pale-faced, with a pencil-thin mustache and dark, soulful eyes.
'I'm doing well, Tommy, thank you.' She searched his eyes. She had last seen him when they had buried her father. He had written a scathing article about guerrilla attacks.
'You should move, Kristin.'
She chose to ignore his words. 'Tommy, you're limping.'
He smiled grimly. 'I just got caught by Quantrill.'
Her heart skipped a beat. 'What do you mean? What happened?'
'The bastard attacked Shawneetown last week. I was with the Federal supply train he and his maniacs caught up with on their way in.' He paused and looked at her, wondering how much he should say to a lady.
'Tommy, tell me! What happened?'
He took a deep breath. 'Kristin, it was awful. Quantrill and his men came after us like a pack of Indians, howling, shouting. They gunned down fifteen men, drivers and escorts. I rolled off the side of the road, into the foliage. I took a bullet in the calf, but I lived to tell the tale. Kristin, they went on into town and murdered ten more men there. Then they burned the village to the ground.'
'Oh, God! How horrible!' Kristin gasped.
'Kristin, come to Kansas. I'm opening an office in Lawrence, and I'm sure you'll be safe.'
She smiled. 'Tommy, my home is in Missouri.'
'But you're in danger.'
'I can't leave the ranch, Tommy.' She wondered if she should tell him that she had married to save her ranch and that she would probably be in real danger from her new husband if she deserted him and ran off to Kansas.
'You should have seen them,' Tommy murmured. 'Kristin, they were savages. You should have seen them.'
She held on to the counter in the mercantile, suddenly feeling ill. He kept talking, and she answered him as politely as she could. She cared about Tommy. He had been a good friend to Adam. It was just that Adam had begun to fade from her life. It was not that she hadn't loved him. She had. But Cole was a stronger force in her life.
Kristin hesitated, then asked him if he thought he could get a message to Matthew for her. He promised to try, and she bought some stationery from Mr. Jaffe and quickly wrote a letter to Matthew. It wasn't easy to explain her marriage. She did it as carefully and as cheerfully as she could, then turned the letter over to Tommy, hoping she had done well.
She kissed Tommy and left him. Pete had gotten the salt licks, and he had stacked the remaining space in the buckboard with alfalfa to help get them through the coming winter.
She told him about Shawneetown, then fell silent. The news bothered her all the way home.
When they arrived at the ranch, she still felt ill. She went out back and stood over her parents' graves. Cold and chilled, she tried to pray, but no thoughts came to her mind.
A while later she felt a presence behind her, and she knew that it was Cole. She was angry, and she didn't know why, unless it was because she knew he didn't love her, and because she knew she was falling in love with him. He was attracted to her, certainly. Maybe he even needed her. But he didn't love her.
She spun around, ready to do battle.
'Quantrill and his animals attacked Shawneetown last week. They killed the men escorting a supply train, and then they went into the village and killed some more, and then they burned the whole place down.'
His eyes narrowed, and he stared at her warily, but he didn't say anything. She walked up to him and slammed her fists against his chest. 'He's a captain! The Confederates made him a captain!'
He grabbed her wrists hard. 'I don't condone Quantrill, and you know it. The Missouri governor considers him and his raiders like an elephant won at a raffle.'
'Let go of me!' she hissed furiously.
'No. You listen to me for a minute, lady. Quantrill has no monopoly on brutality! Quantrill came
He pushed her away from him and turned, his long, angry strides taking him toward the house. The rear door opened and then slammed shut, and he disappeared inside.
She waited a moment, and then she followed him. She didn't know if she wanted to continue the fight or try to make up with him somehow.
It didn't matter. He wasn't in the house anymore.
And that night he didn't come back at all.
CHAPTER TEN
Cole might have slept somewhere else during the night, but he appeared at the breakfast table in the morning. Kristin was angry and wondered what everyone must think. He came and went like the breeze, with no regard for her feelings. Kristin was sharp when he spoke to her. When he asked her to pass him the milk, she seriously considered splashing it in his face or pouring it in his lap. He caught her hand and the pitcher before she could do either. He stared at her hard, and she looked away.
She didn't like Cole's ability to stay away from her. She wanted to fight with him. She wanted to do anything just to bring him close to her again. It was an effort to turn away from him, to find some trivial thing to discuss with Jamie and Shannon.
Cole remained in a foul temper all day. With winter coming on, there was a lot to do. Cole was anxious to have it all done before he left for the East and before Malachi and Jamie had to leave to rejoin their units. They spent the day gathering up as much of the herd as they could for Pete to drive to market. Kristin had been surprised that Cole was willing to let her sell the beef on the Union side of the line, but he had reminded her that the ranch belonged to her brother, Matthew, and that Matthew was fighting for the Union. Cole couldn't go north himself, but Pete could handle the cattle drive, and Malachi and Jamie would be around until he got back at the end of the week.
By dinnertime, Cole seemed to be in a somewhat better mood, and Kristin maintained a polite distance from him. Cole, Jamie and Malachi all sat down to dinner with Kristin and Shannon that night. Delilah refused to sit and made a big fuss over everyone. Jamie made the meal a pleasant affair. He told the two girls about a pair of
