Blame It On Paris

Dame theme, all the French foods, all the elegant little touches…and felt her heart melt like chocolate in heat.

The rain sluiced down harder, no longer light, but pelting in a harsh, beating assault. The umbrella covered some parts of their bodies. Not all. Will looked more and more miserable, and Kelly kept thinking that she needed to say something to make him feel better, but her throat felt so thick, so full of emotion that she couldn't seem to say anything at all.

Will seemed to interpret her silence as agreeing with his responsibility for this major screwup. 'Okay, okay. I admit the plan was flawed and on the impulsive side. But neither of us can seem to scare up an ounce of free time-at least not for each other. I know we're seeing each other Sunday, but that's about my mom's birthday, it's not us time. And yeah, I admit I thought you'd get a charge out of having breakfast at Notre Dame. And I wanted you to remember Paris. I wanted a chance for both of us to be like Paris again, even if we could only catch an hour before real life-'

He looked up, as if hoping she'd interrupt him. She didn't.

He started again. 'I guess the chances of your seducing me on the fifty-yard line are pretty slim, huh? On the other hand, it's a thought that'll hold. There'll be other chances. There could be some terrific warm morning sometime next week. You could just forget that this particular morning turned into a complete and total fiasco.'

'Will?'

His shoulders relaxed. She was willing to speak to him.

'I love you,' she said, softer than a whisper.

His grin started to show up again. Just a rise of the corners of his mouth, but it was coming back.

'If you want to make love, right now, in the pouring rain-it's okay by me.'

There now. His eyes brightened right up.

'But it looks as if a maintenance guy just showed up. At the top of the stairs? So it'd seem to be kind of iffy to pull that off right at this minute.'

Will's head shot toward the uniformed man-then two men-and he swore. 'They're not supposed to be here until seven. Could anything more go wrong this morning?'

'Well,' she said as she finished the last crepe and rather hastily started gathering their gear together. 'We could get arrested. That'd be pretty awkward. But I have to tell you this.'

'What?' he demanded, shooting to his feet as he saw the two maintenance men had suddenly noticed them and were walking in their direction.

But she didn't tell him her thought-they had to move too quickly to get everything together, to peel out of there, hopefully without the maintenance men calling the cops on them, hopefully without both of them getting completely soaked in the downpour.

They reached his car, gasping for breath, both of them hopelessly laughing. Will didn't want to. but even he had to give in to the humor of the situation. And that was the first time she had a chance to say what she'd wanted to earlier.

She kissed him in the damp car, on the cheek, both of them shivering like crazy. 'You're going to do it, aren't you?'

'What?'

'You're going to find a way for us to be together. Because your dad's going to be well soon. And that means you'll need to be making decisions about what you want to do.'

'I know what I want. I want you with me, Kel. That's all that matters. The rest of it-I just don't care.'

'Oh, yes you do,' she whispered. 'You care terribly, Will Maguire.' And she felt her heart thud like a dropped ball bearing. It had taken her all this time to figure out what she needed and wanted in her life-who she was, and who she wasn't.

She was the one who had started out confused.

But it was Will, she understood now, who didn't know himself. And she couldn't make an overwhelming life choice for him.

No one could live a fantasy forever.

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

'QUIT LOOKING so grumpy.' Kelly scolded him as they marched up the church steps. 'You're not going to die if you spend an hour in mass.'

'I could.'

She patted his behind-discreetly-just as they reached the holy water, which she used and he didn't. He got another scolding look when he failed to genuflect. His family was already there-his dad and mom in a pew up front, his sisters and various other family members filling the next couple aisles. Will figured if he got to sit by Ralph, the little squirt would act up, and he'd get to take him out of church. They could play on the lawn or something.

As if Kelly suspected he had nonreligious intentions, he got another pat-this one close to a pinch- as she herded him into an aisle behind the family.

'Unka Will!' Ralphie shrieked, making Martha turn around and roll her eyes for attracting the baby's attention.

'I'll take him anytime.' Will mouthed back to her. The rest of the family, alerted to his presence, turned around like a practiced choir and sent Kelly smiles. Kelly, not him. Kelly was getting all the credit for his attending mass.

Kelly, who was pinching and patting and prodding him every time he looked sideways.

'What?' he demanded when the service was finally over and they could escape back to the car.

'You and I are going to get this religious business out in the open. Get in, buster.'

He did, although getting into her car was like a bull trying to fit into a thimble. She drove, looking damned gorgeous in an ivory top and a skirt that swished around her bare knees. She was wearing the scent he'd gotten her in Paris, and she'd put a couple clips in her hair and pearls in her ears. It was a good-girl pure-lady look, and just made him want to strip her right there and then.

Instead, she picked up take-out coffee and drove him to a spot on the river, where she parked and handed him his cup.

'This whole church thing,' she told him. 'You're being downright dumb about it.'

'Excuse me?'

'You stood there in church like a lump. You know perfectly well what to do. If you don't believe in the religion, that would be one thing-'

'I don't.'

'What a fib. The truth is that your dad pushed religion down your throat, so you took off in the other direction. He wanted you to be devout, so that's the last thing you were willing to be.'

'Kel. Try waking up. I'm not the devout type.'

'Horse spit.' She slipped out of her sandals, lifted her legs over the gearshift and plunked them in his lap.

She seemed to think she could yell at him and get her bare feet rubbed at the same time. The woman had no end to her illusions. It was downright astonishing.

''You're not preachy and churchy, Will. But you have a lot of spirituality in you. You stand up for people. For what's right. You have endless kindness and compassion for those more vulnerable than you. You don't take crap from anyone, but you're not a bully or mean about it.'

'You're calling that spirituality?' he asked.

She took another sip of coffee and started in again. 'You walk at night for the joy of it, take the time to smell the flowers, get down on the floor to play with your nephew. You're first in line when someone needs help. You try to avoid directly hurting people. I see examples of that everywhere. No matter how much your dad infuriates you, you don't attack him. Or your sisters.'

'And you think that's spirituality?' he asked again.

'Yeah, actually. It's just colored in prettier words when you sing it in a hymn.'

He couldn't even drink his coffee, because he had to rub her toes, the balls of her feet. When he traced a thumb