Undercover In High Heels

kind of view that would make a location scout stand up and cheer.

And the house standing in front of it wasn’t any less impressive. It was a large glass structure, constructed of sleek modern angles. I could tell it was the work of some famous architect, the angles leaning to the side as if they might topple over with a strong Santa Ana. The front of the house was paneled in pale blond woods, while what I could see of the back was one solid wall of glass. In the driveway, as if to mock the grandeur of the structure, sat a blue Dodge Neon with a dented front fender.

Last year while working with Felix on the story in Vegas, I’d learned that, while he was swimming in family money from his father’s side (though he wouldn’t divulge just how much), he was a cheapskate of the highest degree, courtesy of his mother’s Scottish upbringing. I’d teased him at the time about being a cheap rich guy. Though I hadn’t realized until now just how rich he must be.

“Wow.” Dana stared up at the imposing structure. “You sure your tabloid guy lives here?”

“He’s not my tabloid guy, ” I protested a little more loudly than I’d meant to. “And I guess we’re about to see.”

Dana locked the Porsche, doing the little beep-beep thing with her rabbit’s-foot remote, and we walked down the neatly laid stone pathway and up a flight of slate stairs to the front door.

“How come you haven’t introduced me to this guy before?” Dana asked, taking in the multimillion-dollar view. “What, is he, like, hideous or something?”

“Not if you like slugs, ” I mumbled as the door opened.

Felix was dressed in the same rumpled button-down shirt he’d been in the last four times I’d seen him, though tonight he was going casual, pairing it with jeans, ripped at the knees. His feet were bare, and while his hair was still sticking up in that messy-chic way (though knowing Felix it was a messy didn’t-bother-to-comb-my-hair-after- rolling-out-of-bed way), I was glad to see he’d at least shaved since the last time I’d seen him, giving his face a deceptively boyish look.

“Maddie, ” he said.

“Felix.”

I felt Dana nudge me in the ribs. “Ohmigod, he’s Hugh Grant-alicious!” she whispered in my ear.

Uh-huh. With the moral fiber of pond scum.

“Some place you’ve got here, ” I said as I pushed past him. The floors were a polished hardwood, the furnishings simple, yet stylish, obviously the work of an interior decorator who knew when to stop knickknacking. Low sofas, pale woods, smooth, clean lines. Overall a calming atmosphere made to showcase the natural beauty of the surrounding hills.

Felix looked around himself, as if he hadn’t really noticed. “It’s a roof.”

“How many square feet have you got?”

He grinned. “Enough.”

“Hi, I’m Dana.” I watched as Dana thrust her hand out at Felix, doing a big-eyed eyelash-batting thing.

Oh brother.

I almost felt sorry for Felix. (Almost. He had, after all, spliced my head on Pamela Anderson’s body.)

“Pleasure to meet you, ” Felix said, pumping Dana’s hand. “Felix Dunn.”

“Oh, I know! Maddie’s told me so much about you.” Dana fluttered her eyelashes and leaned in closer.

“Has she now?” Felix asked, cocking an eyebrow my way.

I pretended not to notice.

“Oh, yes. I think it’s so cool that you’re a reporter. You must see some amaaaaaaazing things, ” she said, drawing out the word with a Betty Boop giggle as she laid a seductive hand on his arm.

Oy vey. It was only a matter of time before the flattery started getting laid down thicker than sunblock on a Venice lifeguard.

“Yes, just last week he saw Bigfoot run off with the Crocodile Woman, ” I added.

Felix grinned, extricating his hand (with no small effort) from Dana’s grip. “Our Maddie’s ever the comedian, isn’t she?”

The sad thing was, I think the Informer had actually printed that story last week.

“No, I’m onto bigger and better things, ” he continued. “Like starlets who work for cyber-sex sites, right?”

Right. I forced myself to rein in my sarcasm. “Where’s your computer?”

“This way, m’ladies.” Felix did a mock bow, gesturing to the back of the house.

Dana giggled and touched his arm again.

Good grief. One week off sex and already her standards were dropping faster than Paris Hilton’s panties.

My wedges echoed on the hardwood as we followed Felix through the foyer and down a small flight of stairs to a large office overlooking the back of the house. The wall of glass capitalized on the unobstructed view of the valley. Beyond the glass sat lush, obviously professional landscaping and a bubbling hot tub perched atop a large wooden deck.

“Wow, what a great view, ” Dana said, pressing her nose to the glass. “And check out the size of that hot tub. I bet you could fit fifteen people in there, easy.”

“Honestly, I’ve never tried. But it fits one quite nicely.”

“Or two…” Dana purred.

That was it. I was driving her straight to an SA meeting after this.

Felix crossed the room to a large, Craftsman-style desk. Beside it an array of printers, fax machines, scanners, and lots of other scary-looking electronics lined the low bookcases. A slim, state-of-the-art computer hummed to life on the desktop, a flat-screen monitor bigger than my television just above.

Felix sat behind it and jiggled his mouse until the screen came to life.

“What’s the name of this bird’s site, then?” he asked, his fingers hovering over the keyboard.

I gave it to him, he typed it in, and almost instantly Jasmine’s pouty lips filled the monitor, the caption You know you want to watch beneath her. He clicked the “enter here” button, surfing through the free trial pages. I tried not to look as images of the red-velvet living room flashed across the screen. A pair of brunettes who looked like twins were playing a game of strip Candy Land. Apparently badly, as neither was wearing much.

He clicked through to a different page and came up with a shot of the kitchen, where two women were doing something completely unsanitary on the counters. Ewwww!

“This the site?” Felix asked.

“Yeah, that’s it. Jasmine said all their credit card info goes through a company called PayMate. Do you think you can hack into it?”

“Hack is such a crude word, ” Felix chided me. “I prefer to think of it as visiting.”

I rolled my eyes. “Fine. Can we pay them a visit?”

“I’m going to set up an account with Jasmine’s girls, ” he replied, clicking through the motions as he talked, “to find out what ISP the information is going through. Then hopefully I can find some sort of back gate to their system that will unlock the security code.”

“Won’t that be hard to do?” I asked. “I mean, it is a credit card company. If just anyone could hack into their system, they’d be ruined.”

Felix grinned at me, showing off a pair of dimples. “Luckily, I’m not just anybody.”

“Wow, you must be, like, really smart to know this much about computers, ” Dana crooned, tearing herself away from the window. “Where did you learn this stuff?”

Felix shrugged noncommittally. “Around.” I watched as he created a screen name. Ppingtom07. Cute.

Finally a screen verifying his account came up. Then it asked him if he’d like to make a secure payment now. He clicked yes, and as the screen transferred us to PayMate.com’s home page, Felix opened a new window. This one had a black screen with a little flashing cursor prompt.

“Bingo, ” he said.

“What, are we in?”

He chuckled. “Hardly. As you said, it’s no simple task to break into a secure network like this one. But I’ve got their location now. It’s a start.”

He did a few more clicks, and a sequence of numbers started appearing on the black screen.