Deadlocked

I might feel al that again, but I was so emotional y battered that I’d gone a little numb. It was a curious feeling—as if my hand were asleep, but I expected it would be al pins and needles at any second. “I love him,” I said, but even to my own ears I didn’t sound happy about it.

Chapter 11

You may wonder why I was willing to eat in the kitchen where I’d just witnessed a violent death. The fact is, Donald Cal away’s demise was not the worst thing that had happened in my kitchen—not by a long shot. Maybe that was another thing I was getting numb to.

Just before our food was ready, when Dermot’s back was turned, I slid open the drawer and extricated the dead man’s sunglasses, sliding them into my apron pocket. I admit, I can’t say my legs were too steady when I excused myself to go to the bathroom. When I was safely shut inside, I put my hands over my face and sat on the edge of the tub to take a few deep breaths. I got up, dropping Donald Cal away’s dark glasses onto the bath mat. I stomped on them three times, quickly. Without stopping to think, I held the bath mat over the waste can in a funnel shape and shook it gently until al the pieces were safely at the bottom of the plastic bag acting as a liner.

After supper, I planned to take the bag out to the big garbage can that we had to wheel out to the road every Friday.

When I heard Dermot cal ing me, I washed my hands and my face and left the bathroom, making myself stand straight. As I passed through my bedroom, I slipped the cluviel dor into my pocket, where the sunglasses had been. I couldn’t leave it alone in my room. Not anymore.

The hamburgers were good, and I managed to eat mine and some fruit salad, too. Dermot and I were quiet together, which suited me fine. As we did the dishes, Dermot told me shyly that he had a date and would be going out after he showered.

“Oh my gosh!” I grinned at him. “Who’s the lucky girl?”

“Linda Tonnesen.”

“The doctor!”

“Yes,” he said a little doubtful y. “I think that’s what she said she did. Treats human ailments?”

“Oh, that’s a big deal, real y, Dermot,” I said. “Doctors get a lot of respect in our society. I guess as far as she knows, you’re human?”

He flushed. “Yes, she thinks I’m a very attractive human. I met her at the bar three nights ago.”

It would be pretty stupid for me to comment further. He was handsome, sweet natured, and strong. What more could a woman want?

Besides, considering the confused state of my own love life, I could hardly pass out dating tips.

I told Dermot I’d finish the dishes so he could go get ready for his date, and by the time I was ensconced on the living room couch with a book, he came downstairs in navy slacks and a pale blue striped shirt with a button- down col ar. He looked amazing, and I told him so. He grinned at me.

“I hope she’l think so,” he said. “I love the way she smel s.”

That was a very fairy compliment. Linda Tonnesen was a smart woman with a great sense of humor, but she was not what humans thought of as conventional y pretty. Her smel had scored her big points with Dermot. I’d have to remember that.

By the time Dermot left, dark had fal en. I got the bag containing Jannalynn’s jacket and went out the back door, on my way to Bil ’s house. I felt a little better after I’d dropped the other little bag, the one containing the smashed dark glasses, into the garbage bin. I turned on my flashlight and strode to the woods. There was a little path; Bil came over often, probably far more often than I knew.

Just before I reached the cleared ground of the old cemetery, I heard a sound to my left. I stopped in my tracks. “Bil ?” I said.

“Sookie,” he answered, and then he was right in front of me. He had his own little plastic sack looped over his left hand. We were al carrying bags around tonight.

“I brought Jannalynn’s jacket,” I said. “For you and Heidi.”

“You stole her jacket?” He sounded amused.

“If that were the worst thing I’d done today, I’d be a happy woman.”

Bil let that pass, though I could almost feel him peering at me. Vampire eyesight is excel ent, of course. He took my arm and we walked a few feet to get into the cemetery grounds. Even though there weren’t many lights there, there were a few, and I could see (faintly) that Bil was excited about something.

He opened my bag, put it to his face, and inhaled. “No, that’s not a scent I picked up at the gate in the backyard. Of course, considering al the scents around there and the length of time before we were able to investigate, that can’t be a definite no.” He handed it back.

I felt almost disappointed. Jannalynn made me so antsy that I would have liked to find her guilty of something, but I chided myself for being uncharitable. I should be glad Sam was dating an innocent woman. And I was. Right?

“You look unhappy,” Bil said. We were walking back to his house, and I’d tucked the plastic bag under my arm. I’d been thinking of how I’d return Jannalynn’s jacket to Sam’s office. I’d have to do it soon.

“I am unhappy,” I said. Then, because I didn’t want to explain my every inner qualm, I told Bil , “I listened to the news on the radio while I was cutting up sweet potatoes. That girl Kym, the police are trying to blame her murder on a vampire because she died in Eric’s front yard. Someone vandalized Fangtasia, threw white paint al over the exterior. Are Felipe and his crew stil here? Why don’t they go home?”

Bil put his arm around me. “Calm down,” he said, his voice hard.

I was so surprised that I actual y held my breath for a moment.

“Breathe,” he commanded. “Slowly. Thoughtful y.”

“What are you, Zen Master Fang?”