to see Norden’s gun shoved in my face. By now, he’d undoubtedly read up on shapeshifters enough to know that, yes, guns could hurt me. Bad.
“What are you doing?” Kane asked, his voice perfectly calm.
“Shh. Didn’t you see? Goon Squad patrol.” I rolled deeper into the doorway, motioning to Kane to follow. If the Goons hadn’t seen us, we could still hide. “Don’t step on the junkie.”
He stayed where he was.
“Kane, are you crazy? If they catch these two out of Deadtown without a permit, they’ll take them away.”
He laughed, a deep, silvery chuckle that gradually rose in pitch and intensity. I peered out of my hiding place. Kane held his stomach and threw back his head, looking ready to howl at the moon. Except he was laughing. Usually I like Kane’s laugh—and heaven knew he could use one right then—but it’s hard to enjoy somebody’s mirth when you have no idea what’s so goddamn funny.
“I’m sorry,” he said, wiping his eyes. “It’s just that, well, you took off so fast, and then,
They got bigger and meaner-looking as they got closer. Showdown time. I stood and stepped out of the doorway. The zombies were out of it, and Kane had finally cracked under all the pressure or something. It was up to me to handle the situation.
The only problem was, I didn’t have a clue how.
I tensed, ready for a fight. The human Goon I could take easily, but not his zombie partner. Not on my own. There was only one way. I’d have to shift. Into something big and dangerous and preferably armor plated. I didn’t like to shift this close to the full moon—it made the animal consciousness stronger—but if I was going to protect Kane and these zombies, I had no choice.
I closed my eyes and focused. A rhinoceros. It was the only thing I could think of that might work. I’d seen one on a rampage on a nature show, trampling everything in its path. I brought that image to mind and tried to feel the rhino’s anger. Threat . . . rage . . . protect my own. I felt a bubbling sensation under my skin as the shift began, a hardening at the tip of my nose, my limbs starting to thicken. God, I hoped I could hang on to enough of my personality to keep from goring the Goons to death. Then the bubbling intensified into a throb, and I didn’t care anymore. Pain shot through my head as my skull began to lengthen and grow.
A hand on my arm startled me out of my concentration. How dare—? But the touch was gentle, and I opened my eyes to see somebody . . . No, wait, I knew this being. Kane. It was Kane, looking perfectly normal and in control. “Don’t, Vicky,” he said. “It’s not necessary.”
Not necessary. Not necessary. The meaning of those words got through, and I tried to slam on the brakes. Once a shift has started, it takes a huge amount of effort and will to cut it short. I staggered backward, thinking,
“She all right?” a voice asked.
“Fine, fine,” I heard Kane reply, sounding all hale and hearty and aren’t-we-all-good-old-boys. “A little too much to drink, that’s all.”
Thanks, Kane. Here I was, ready to risk my life to protect him, and he’s telling the cops I’m a drunk. I’d kick his ass for that. As soon as I could stand up straight again.
Kane and the Goons were discussing what a fine evening it was. As the world gradually came back into focus around me, I saw Kane hand some papers to the human Goon. He inspected them for a moment, then gave them back.
“Need help getting everyone home?” he asked, sounding downright friendly.
I stepped forward. More like a weave, really, but it was forward. “No, thanks.” My voice came out as a bellow, sounding like, well, an angry rhino. I cleared my throat. “We’re fine.”
The human Goon shook his head and shot Kane a sympathetic look. Then he and his partner resumed their patrol, and I smacked Kane in the shoulder.
“I thought you didn’t have permits for those zombies!”
He looked surprised. “Why would you think that?”
“At Creature Comforts. You told Daniel you’d taken them out of Deadtown without a permit.”
“Stop saying ‘zombie.’ Anyway, I’m a lawyer. Do you seriously think I’d break the law
He tugged on his half-asleep zombie, who shambled forward, and they moved along Washington Street. I was faced with the problem of getting my zombie back on her feet. She lay facedown in the doorway, one arm thrown across the vampire junkie. They looked almost cozy together—or would have, if either of them had looked a little less like death warmed over.
I yanked on her arm, which raised her off the ground a bit, but she was so stiff—nothing would bend the way it was supposed to—that I couldn’t get her to her feet.
“Will you hurry up?” Kane called from down the street. “I’ve got at least two dozen phone calls I should be making right now.”
I looked down at my zombie and her junkie companion, then stepped over the pair of them to get behind her. Crouching, I got both arms under her, one at the armpit and the other at midthigh. I called on the remnants of brute rhinoceros strength and heaved. As I straightened, I lifted her from the ground. I stepped over the junkie and out of the doorway. It was like carrying a plank, but I had her.
The zombie groaned and squirmed a bit, and I shushed her like a mother comforting a half-awake infant. As we passed under a streetlight, I could see clumps of powder sticking to her greenish-gray cheek. This female may have been human once, but she sure as hell wasn’t now. She was a zombie—and she’d still be a zombie no matter what politically correct name Kane or anybody else called her. She uttered another small groan.
“C’mon, hon,” I said, “Let’s get you home.” Still weaving a little, I hurried down the block after Kane.
WE PASSED THROUGH THE TREMONT STREET CHECKPOINT into Deadtown and almost immediately ran into Tina and one of her friends. They both wore low-slung jeans and tight belly shirts that showed off a couple of inches of zombie pelvis. The temperature was close to freezing, but the undead don’t feel the cold.
“What’s with the crashed-out zombies?” Tina asked.
“Don’t call them zombies,” Kane said. “It’s demeaning to them and you both.”
Tina rolled her bloodred eyes in the way only a teenage girl can, and then looked at me inquiringly.
“Kane was making a political commercial.”
Tina’s jaw dropped. “A commercial? Like for TV? Why didn’t you ask me? I would’ve—”
“You had school,” I reminded her. “In fact, is school even out for the night yet?”
Tina and her friend exchanged a look.
“Tina, you of all people should know better.” Tina and a friend—this one, maybe—had gotten zombified because they’d skipped school to go shopping. If Tina hadn’t cut class that day, she would’ve been miles away from the plague zone.
She shrugged. “So what? I mean, what’s gonna happen to us now? We’re already dead.”
Good point. But still. “If you want to learn demon-fighting, you’ve got to be willing to study.”
“I am! I’m reading that book you gave me. Jenna even saw me, didn’t you, Jenna?” Tina’s friend nodded and popped her gum. “Anyway,” Tina said, “stop trying to change the subject.” She planted herself directly in front of Kane, fists on her skinny hips. “How come you didn’t ask me to be on TV? I’d be way better than those two corpses. Are you sure they’re even reanimated?”
“I don’t have time for this nonsense.” Kane moved on, guiding his zombie around the two girls.
“Hey—”
“Tina, don’t bug him now. He’s had a bad night.”