could not see in the dimness what it was she was folding; it seemed to be giving her some difficulty, for she opened and refolded it several times.
In any case, Etsuko,? she went on, ?why would he have gone to all this trouble if he wasn?t absolutely sincere? Why would he have gone to all this trouble on my behalf? Sometimes, Etsuko, you seem so doubting. You should be happy for me. Things are working out at last.?
?Yes, of course. I?m very happy for you.?
?But really, Etsuko, it would be unfair to start doubing him after he?s gone to all this trouble. It would be quite unfair?
?Yes.?
?And Mariko would be happier there. America is a better place for a young girl to grow up. Out there, could do all kinds of things with her life. She could bec a business girl. Or she could study painting at college become an artist. All these things are much easier America, Etsuko. Japan is no place for a girl. What can look forward to here??
I made no reply. Sachiko glanced up at me and gave small laugh.
?Try and smile, Etsuko,? she said. Things will turn well in the end.?
?Yes, I?m sure they will.?
?Of course they will.?
?Yes.??
For another minute or so, Sachiko continued with packing. Then her hands became still, and she gazed across the room towards me, her face caught in that strange mixture of light.
?I suppose you think I?m a fool, she said, quietly ?Don?t you, Etsuko??
I looked back at her, a little surprised.
?I realize we may never see America,? she said. ? even if we did, I know how difficult things will be. Did you think I never knew that??
I gave no reply, and we went on staring at each other. ?But what of it?? said Sachiko. ?What difference does It make? Why shouldn?t I go to Kobe? After all, Etsuko, what do I have to lose? There?s nothing for me at my uncle?s house. Just a few empty rooms, that?s all. I could sit there in and grow old. Other than that there?ll be nothing. Just empty rooms, that?s all, You know that yourself, Etsuko.?
?But Mariko,? I said, ?What about Mariko?? ?Mariko? She?ll manage well enough. She?ll just have Sachiko continued to gaze at me through the dimness, e side of her face in shadow. Then she said: ?Do you imagine for one moment that I?m a good mother to her?
I remained silent. Then suddenly, Sachiko laughed.
?Why are we talking like this?? she said, and her hands
to move busily once more. ?Everything will turn out , I assure you. I?ll write to you when I reach America. haps, Etsuko, you?ll even come and visit us one day. U could bring your child with you.?
Yes, indeed.?
Perhaps you?ll have several children by then.? Yes,? I said, laughing awkwardly. ?You never know.? Sachiko gave a sigh and lifted both hands into the air.
?there?s so much to pack,? she murmured. ?I?ll just have to some of it behind.?
at there for some moments, watching her.
?If you wish,? I said, eventually ?I could go and look for 11w. It?s getting rather late.?
You only tire yourself, Etsuko. I?ll finish packing and t still hasn?t come back we could go and look for her all right. I?ll see if I can find her. It?s nearly dark now?
Sachiko glanced up, then shrugged. ?Perhaps you?d best We lantern with you,? she said. It?s quite slippery the bank.?
The to my feet and took the lantern down from the shadows moved across the cottage as I walked towards the doorway. As I was leaving, I glanced back towards Sachiko. I could see only her silhouette, seated before the open partitions, the sky behind her turned almost to night.
Insects followed my lantern as I made my way along the river. Occasionally, some creature would become trapped inside, and I would then have to stop and hold the lantern still until it had found its way out.
In time, the small wooden bridge appeared on the bank ahead of me. While crossing it, I stopped for a moment to gaze at the evening sky. As I recall, a strange sense of tranquillity came over me thereon that bridge. I stood there for some minutes, leaning over the rail, listening to the sounds of the river below me. When finally I turned, I saw my own shadow, cast by the lantern, thrown across the wooden slats of the bridge.
?What are you doing here?? tasked, for the little girl was before me, sat crouched beneath the opposite rail. I came forward until I could see her more clearly under my lantern. She was looking at her palms and said nothing.
?What?s the matter with you?? I said. ?Why are you sitting here like this??
The insects were clustering around the lantern. I put it down in front of me, and the child?s face became more sharply illuminated. After a long silence, she said: ?1 don?t want to go away. I don?t want to go away tomorrow.?
I gave a sigh. ?But you?ll like it. Everyone?s a little frightened of new things. You?ll like it over there.?
?I don?t want to go away. And I don?t like him. He?s like a pig.?
?You?re not to speak like that,? I said, angrily. We stared at each other for a moment, then she looked back down
