A Summer Smile

sensations she had been experiencing. She was conscious of a slight ache between her thighs now that Daniel had left her, but she wasn’t certain whether it was soreness or an aching emptiness to be refilled. “You didn’t hurt me.”

“You’re sure?” His palm reached between her thighs to rub her with loving gentleness. “You felt so good that I wanted to take every bit of you.” His tone was rueful. “I think I tried to do just that. Next time I’ll try to act more the gentleman. You can see I’m not used to the role.”

“I didn’t mind.” The words were so inadequate. She felt tongue-tied, and the tears were stinging behind her closed lids. How could she tell him what a precious gift he had given her? The final healing. It had come so swiftly out of this darkness that had seemed suspended in time. Her own need to give comfort to Daniel had flowed effortlessly into the giving of her body as well. Giving. That was the key. It was being taken that was the horror. Giving was beautiful. Giving was love. Her lips curved in a smile of radiant tenderness invisible to him in the darkness. And Daniel had given her that beauty. He had been rough and passionate as a storm at sea yet he had still given as well as taken. Why was he worrying so about a roughness that she had instigated herself? “You were upset.”

He stiffened. His hand ceased its intimate petting motion and dropped away from her. “And you felt sorry for me,” he said with soft violence. “Dammit, you felt sorry for me!”

“No,” she protested. “I mean, yes, I did feel sorry for you. I wanted to help you.” He had rolled away from her, and she could hear him moving in the darkness, pulling on his clothes. “But that’s not-”

“The hell it wasn’t. You felt sorry for me.” His voice was jerky. “My God, you even told me how grateful you were to me. So grateful you decided to give the guy a little tip for his trouble.”

“A tip?” Zilah tried to smother the anger that flared at his choice of words. She sat up. “I don’t give tips of that nature.” Her voice was taut with pain. “Contrary to what you may think, I am not a whore.”

“Oh, hell, I’ve done it again.” The light of the lantern snapped on to reveal Daniel kneeling in front of her. He was dressed, with the exception of his shirt. His hair was a tousled mass of flame and his eyes were narrowed in concern on her face. “I’ve hurt your feelings, haven’t I? I’m sorry. I guess my damn pride got in the way. I couldn’t stand the thought of being a charity case. It brings back too many memories.”

“Memories?”

The light of the lantern struck sleek shadows over his naked shoulders as he shrugged. “I was an orphan from the time I was six. I guarantee that it doesn’t give you a liking for being on the receiving end.” His gaze wandered down her body to rest with compulsive intensity on the soft velvet folds that his hand had so recently caressed. His tongue ran over his lips to moisten their sudden dryness. “On the other hand, there’s a distinct possibility I could change my mind given the right set of circumstances. You’re lovely, Zilah.”

She felt a familiar tingling begin where his gaze was caressing her. “You’re not very steadfast.”

“Oh, but I am.” His gaze flew back to her face, and he answered with surprising gravity. “I’m as steadfast as the North Star. Once my course is set, I don’t change. Remember that.”

She was caught up in those swirls of dark intimacy once again and for a moment she couldn’t break free. She pulled her eyes away from his with an effort and lowered them to the glittering silver sheet on which they were sitting. “I’ll remember.” She felt suddenly shy. Strange after all they’d experienced together to feel this sudden rush of shyness. She reached for the blue shirt Daniel had taken off her earlier and slipped it on hurriedly. “I wasn’t treating you like a charity case, you know. I just wanted to help.” She lifted her eyes to meet his. “I still do.” She drew a deep breath and turned away, snatching up her clothes and pulling them on quickly. “And I intend to do just that, whether you think it’s charity or not. As I said before, you can be a very idiotic man, Daniel.”

He frowned. “Idiotic? What the hell do you-What are you doing?”

She glanced up from where she was kneeling, stuffing items hastily in the backpack. “Packing up. We’re getting out of here. Grab the sheet and the lantern, will you?” She was crawling toward the opening, dragging the backpack behind her.

“Zilah, dammit, come back here!”

“Not a chance,” she said over her shoulder. “If you’re so determined to keep me safe, you’ll have to do it under an open sky.” She heard him growl something under his breath but she ignored it serenely. By the time she had negotiated the barricade that Daniel had erected at the mouth of the cave he was right behind her. His expression was grim in the halo of light from the lantern. “This is crazy, Zilah. Get back into the cave.”

“And lie awake worrying about you all night?” She shook her head. “You know that if I weren’t along, you’d be taking your chances out here.”

He went still. “Worrying about me?”

“Yes, worrying,” she echoed softly. “I think I may be worrying quite a bit about you from now on, Daniel.” She sat down and leaned her back against the stony wall of the cliff. “If you’ll sit down and get settled, we’ll be able to turn out the lantern. For someone who is so concerned about Hassan discovering us, you’re being very reckless.”

He dropped down beside her, still scowling. “Zilah, you’re being-”

She swiftly put her fingers over his lips. “Shall I tell you something David Bradford once told me when I was going through a bad time? He said, ‘I can’t claim to understand your pain. We all experience sadness and pain in accordance with our own natures. But if you’ll let me, I’ll share it. Open to me, give to me, and we’ll handle it together. That’s how it should be between friends.’” Her eyes were glowing softly. “And we are friends, Daniel. Despite what happened in that cave tonight, I know I don’t have any right to expect more from you. I don’t want you to feel pressured or harried. I realize that I’m nothing special in your life, that you probably would have reacted to any woman in the same way. Sex hasn’t as much emotional significance to a man as it does to a woman.” She smiled a little shakily. “But we do have friendship. We couldn’t have gone through what we did today without jumping a few hundred boundaries or so.” She nestled her head on his shoulder with the endearing confidence of a small child. “So, like it or not, we’re in this together, Daniel.”

Daniel flipped off the lantern and was silent for a long moment. “I…do like it.” His big hand gently began to stroke her hair. “Old friend.”

“Good.” She was vaguely conscious of his tucking the silver sheet over both of them. “Now, go to sleep and we’ll worry about Hassan tomorrow.”

“Yes, ma’am.” There was a thread of amusement beneath the meekness in his voice.

It didn’t disturb the contentment she was experiencing. How lovely to be needed, she thought drowsily. For the past few years she had been the one in constant need. Everyone around her had treated her as if she were a piece of fine china that had been shattered, and though repaired, must always be given special care. But with Daniel she could give as well as take. How wonderful to know that no matter how dominant and aggressive he appeared, there would be moments when Daniel needed her.

Zilah drifted off to sleep almost immediately but Daniel didn’t even make the attempt. With the rifle within reach he felt fairly secure, but there was no way he would expose Zilah to additional risk. He would sit here until dawn and guard her while she slept. A slight smile touched his lips and he brushed a kiss on her temple. He would be careful to guard her very well.

Nothing special. Those were the words she had used to describe an experience that had rocked him to his foundations. She had tried so hard to be understanding and sophisticated: he had been torn between tenderness and indignation as she’d told him so gravely she knew that the sexual experience they’d shared meant little to him. Perhaps it hadn’t been more than physical gratification in the past, but that was before Zilah. Before he had looked into clear, grave eyes that asked and answered at the same time. Before he had seen a summer smile that he knew would now hold all the seasons of loving for him.

Hell, he couldn’t expect her to feel the same way. He had known that she was actually backing away from him when she’d been murmuring all that bull about how she didn’t want him to feel harried. Who could blame her when he had just taken her with less ceremony and finesse than he usually spent on the most casual of bedmates? He had lost control and he’d been damned lucky she hadn’t rejected him entirely. She needed breathing room, and if he wanted her to come to him willingly and joyfully, then he had to give it to her. Damn, it was going to be hard after having her tonight. He had been within a breath of making love to her again when she had bundled up their belongings and crawled out of the cave. What a crazy thing to do. Crazy and sweet and caring.

He leaned his head back against the stone wall of the cliff and breathed in the sweet warm air that was scented pungently with wild grass and tamarisk. His arm tightened unconsciously about Zilah. He felt very lucky tonight. Luckier than ever before in his life. For the first time in years he was feeling an eager anticipation about