The Reach

beat my students unless they truly deserve it.'

Jess hoped her small smile was properly apologetic. 'Of course not, Professor. I did wonder if you could help me, though. I'm writing a paper on the symptoms and treatments of schizophrenia--mainly younger patients, preadolescents.'

'Then you won't have much data. The adolescent transition tends to trigger a schizophrenic type.'

'But there are cases as young as, say, six years old?'

'Extremely rare. Where before a child might be hyperactive, or moody, or even aggressive, the hormonal changes during puberty wreak havoc in the brain and you see personality fragmentation, psychosis. I'd be surprised to see a confirmed diagnosis as young as six.'

'If a diagnosis were in doubt--say a child has been labeled as schizophrenic by an expert, but others had reason to question it--what would you look for?'

'Organization of any kind, Miss Chambers. In schizophrenics the thinking process has been interrupted, scrambled, if you will. Without medication a patient is often unable to focus on a particular line of thought and carry it through. Autism is often mistaken for schizophrenia, and vice versa.'

'Would a child in this situation be sedated, restrained? Would neuroleptics be an effective treatment?'

Thomas frowned. 'I would emphasize family therapy and behavioral modification techniques. You want to reward a patient's good behavior while controlling his environment to the utmost degree.'

'So you would not isolate a child in these circumstances?'

'Absolutely not. Now if you'll excuse me, I've got another class to teach. Unless you'd like me to write your paper for you?'

***

When Jess arrived back at her apartment, there was a message on the machine from Professor Shelley.

'Have you had time to take a look at her file?' Shelley asked, when Jess had reached her at home.

'I read through it, yes.'

'Any questions?'

'Something struck me. It said that you were the one who recommended her admittance. It also said that you're her court-appointed guardian.'

There was a long pause on the other end. Jess imagined Shelley sitting in a wing chair by the light of a lamp. Did she have an apartment or a house? Did the professor live alone? She realized how little she knew about Shelley's personal life. At the same time she wondered why it mattered.

'I did recommend her, yes,' Shelley said. 'I kept close track of Sarah after she was born. She had family who raised her for a year or so. Sarah's mother was not entirely stable, her parents were taking care of both of them. It was difficult. Sarah's grandparents had my number, and when she got to be too much to handle, they called me. I agreed to watch over her treatment.'

'None of this is in the file. Do you know why?'

'That you'd have to ask Dr. Wasserman.' A sudden sharp intake of breath; then the professor moved on. 'I think it's important to capitalize on any progress you made during your first meeting. You should get down there as many times as you can this week.' Then, quietly, a bit more gently, she said, 'I know you feel that we sprang this on you without proper warning. I can only say that if it were completely up to me I might have handled things differently.'

'I appreciate that.'

'Take another look,' Shelley said. 'You've read the file, you're better prepared. Now's your chance to get through to her. Write down everything you see, everything you feel is important. We'll meet in my office on Monday.'

--8--

The next few days passed uneventfully. But when Jess Chambers reached the hospital for what would be her fourth session with Sarah, she was informed by the admitting secretary that Dr. Wasserman had gone to attend a psychiatric conference in New York. He had left instructions for her.

I am allowing you to continue with your sessions while I am gone on one condition: that you hold them only in Sarah's room and only after she has received her medication. She remains in restraints for the time being at my request. If you are alone with her, be alert and do not allow her to touch you.

The staff has my instructions and will follow them to the letter. I do not want Sarah moved while I am gone for any reason. Maria is perfectly capable of handling any request. She is aware of the situation and will decide what is reasonable.

Please record in your notes everything that occurs. If you have any questions I may be reached through my secretary.

Jess did not know whether to feel angry or relieved that Wasserman was gone. He had hovered over her for much of the week, and pushed her a bit after her last visit, asking her in detail about her observations and theories. She hadn't had much to say; each of the hour-long sessions since the first had been spent in silence. Sarah had not moved or made a sound, and after long periods of note-taking, sketching, and the occasional unanswered question or thought, Jess had left to go home again, her frustration levels growing.

She knew it would take time for Sarah to get used to her presence. And there was always the chance she'd never respond to anyone or anything again. But still, it was a depressing experience. She had begun to wonder if Sarah mouthing those words during that first visit had been her imagination playing tricks on her. Muscle spasms could sometimes look like attempts at speech.

Maybe I'm crazy. Maybe I just saw what I wanted to see.

She made her way down to the basement, feeling the chill of the place settle into her bones. Do not allow her to touch you. A strange warning indeed. She wondered whether it was simply Wasserman's way of lending a greater importance to the proceedings. His instructions made her feel like a child left home alone for the first time, and of course that was exactly the way he wanted it. Goddamn it if I'm going to play his games.

Maria was out from behind the desk before the elevator doors fully opened. Her voice was tense and her face and neck rigid, and sweat stood out on her forehead.

'She is not still,' the big woman said. 'The way she looks, it is not right.'

'Has she had her medication, Maria?'

Maria shook her head. 'Soon. I do not like to go there. I let you in the hall, no further.' The woman nodded again. 'You go see what I tell you.'

***

This time at Sarah's door was subtly different than the last. The hallway seemed darker than before. A bulb was out and the lights farther down the hall cast strange shadows. Jess stopped for a moment before swinging the door open.

Sarah was crouched against the far wall, rocking slowly back and forth, her long black hair sweeping across her face. She still wore the straitjacket. At the sound of the door closing she jumped, and then continued rocking from the heels to the balls of her feet.

Any change is a good sign, Jess told herself. Something is better than nothing. She examined her own state of mind, reaching deep down inside where cold things grew. On the way here she had been jumpy for some reason, nervous enough that she checked for sweat stains under her arms. But now that she was in the room with Sarah she felt her anxiousness subside. Wasserman's instructions had made her angry, and the anger helped her focus.

Establish trust, Jess told herself. The first goal. 'I'm going to release your arms now, Sarah. Do you hear me? I'm going to release you.' She reached over, slowly, slowly, undid the buckles. Slipped the girl's arms from the jacket and let it fall, and stepped back. Through it all Sarah remained limp, pliable as soft clay. The rocking had ceased abruptly as soon as Jess touched her.

Later she would admit to herself that releasing the girl had satisfied the small, petty part of her she had allowed Wasserman to reach. Now she only thought of it as an attempt at a connection.

The signs of schizophrenia. Disorganized thinking, unstructured thoughts. Bizarre and illogical behavior. What else had Professor Thomas said? Study the facts and make your own determination.

Crouching by the girl's side, she spoke once again of her reasons for coming, trying to be as honest and