Dear God…
Raff changed colour. Held onto the back of the nearest chair.
She moved then, closing the distance between them in a heartbeat, linking her arms around his chest and tugging him to her. She held him and held him and held him. She’d had some inkling, the moment she’d seen the buried box. But Raff… This was a lightning bolt.
Raff…
He’d been her hero since she was eight years old. He was her wonderful Raff.
Her love.
‘I didn’t…’ he said, and it was as if he was waking from a nightmare. ‘I believed Philip. He said I was on the wrong side.’
‘That’s why there was never a court case,’ she whispered. ‘The storm hit just as the crash happened. There was only Philip’s word.’
They’d believed him. They’d all believed him. It had been so hard-so unthinkable-to do anything else.
She saw it all.
Philip’s stupidity had killed Ben; had desperately injured Sarah. He couldn’t admit it, but what followed…
Some part of Philip was still decent. He was a kid raised in Banksia Bay, and he’d been their friend in childhood. His parents were friends with her parents. They’d loved Ben to bits.
He’d have been truly appalled.
So a part of him had obviously decided to do the ‘right thing’, and in his eyes he had. He’d come back here to practice law, playing the son to her parents, devoting himself to Banksia Bay as Ben would have.
‘He’s been making amends for Ben,’ she said, and she was trying hard to hold back the anger. Raff didn’t need her anger now. He just needed…her? ‘He came back and tried to make amends to us all.’
And then, despite what she’d intended, anger hit, a wave so great it threatened to overwhelm her. ‘No. Not to us all. He tried to make amends to me and to my parents. He would have married me, as if that somehow made up for Ben’s life. But to you… For ten years he’s let you think you were responsible. For ten years he’s let you hold the blame.’
Tears were coursing down her cheeks now. She’d thought she was comforting Raff but her rage was so great there was no comfort she could give. If Philip walked in the door right now…
‘I’ll tear his heart out,’ she stammered. ‘If he has a heart. I can’t bear it. He’s lost you years.’
‘No.’
Raff put her back from him then, holding her hard by each shoulder. He’d regained his colour and, unbelievably, he was smiling. ‘I believe you told me you loved me before you found this tape.’
‘Yes, but…’
‘Then it’s Philip who’s lost the ten years. I’ve faced it and come out the other side.’ He took a deep breath. ‘Whew. This takes some getting used to.’
‘We can tell the world. Oh, Raff… I can’t bear anyone thinking a moment longer that you…’
‘That I was dumb as a teenager? I
‘No!’
‘He’s lost you,’ Raff said and he tugged her against him and let his chin rest on her hair. ‘Winner takes all. That’d be me. And I need to think things through before I do anything rash-like spreading this far and wide.’
She stared at him as if he were out of his mind. ‘Why on earth…?’
‘You know, my reputation does no end of good for my street cred,’ he said, thoughtful now. ‘How many local kids know the local cop was dumb and someone died because of it? You get experts lecturing kids on speed and they shrug it off. They see how Mrs Fryer treats me? For a cop, that’s gold. I reckon it’s even saved lives.’
‘Raff…’
‘Don’t think it’s not important,’ he said, laughter fading. He was holding her at arm’s length and meeting her gaze with gravity and truth. ‘To look at Sarah now and know I wasn’t responsible for her pain… To look at you and know it wasn’t me who hurt you… I can’t tell you what that means. But Philip has some pretty heavy stuff coming to him anyway. I can cope without my own pound of flesh. Believe me, I can cope.
‘All I need I have right here. This tape is a great gift, Abby, but the greatest gift of all is you.’
He tugged her to him then, and he held her, close enough so their heartbeats merged. She was dissolving into him, she thought. She loved this man with all her heart. No matter what he decided to do about this tape, they could go forward from this moment.
‘Marry me,’ he said and the world stood still.
‘Marry?’ She could barely get the word out.
‘I hear on the grapevine you have a perfectly good wedding dress. I’m a man who hates waste.’
‘Raff…’
‘Don’t quibble,’ he said sternly. ‘Just say yes.’
‘You’re in shock. You’re emotional. You need time to think.’
He put her away from him again. Held her at arm’s length. Smiled.
‘I’ve thought,’ he said. ‘Marry me.’
‘Okay.’
Okay? As an acceptance of a marriage proposal it lacked a certain finesse but it was a great start. For a lawyer. He found himself laughing, a great explosion of happiness that came from so far within he’d never known that place existed. He lifted her up in his arms and whirled her round as if she weighed nothing.
She did weigh nothing. She was part of him-his Abby, his love.
His…wife?
He set her down, laughter fading. Joy was taking its place, a joy so great he felt he was shedding an old skin and bursting into something new.
She tilted her chin and he kissed her, so slowly, so thoroughly satisfactorily, that words weren’t possible. Words weren’t needed for a very long time.
She held him tight, she kissed him and she placed her future in his hands. She loved him so much she felt her heart could burst.
He was Banksia Bay’s bad boy no longer. He was just… Raff.
If he insisted, then maybe she wouldn’t tell the town about Philip, she conceded-but she would tell her parents. And she would tell Philip that she knew. And then… This was Banksia Bay. If things got around… Things always got around.
But right now it was becoming incredibly hard to care. All she cared about was that Raff was holding her as if he’d never let her go. He was kissing her as he’d kissed her when she was sixteen, only more so. A lot more so. He was grown into her man. He was her love, for ever and ever.
‘I can’t believe this is happening,’ he said at last in a voice that was changed, different. It was the voice of a man who was walking into a future he’d never dreamed of. ‘Abby, are you sure?’ And then he hesitated. ‘I do need to care for Sarah.’ There was sudden doubt.
‘I believe there’s room enough here for all of us,’ she said, deeply contented. She pulled back enough to peep through to the next room, where Lionel and Sarah were watching television. They were covered in three dogs, two cats and a vast bowl of popcorn. They were looking…self-conscious. On closer inspection… They were holding hands.
‘There must be something in the water,’ she said and grinned, and Raff tugged her close again, smiling wide enough to make her dissolve in the happiness of his smile.
‘So you’d take us all on? This place. And Sarah’s dogs and guinea pigs and hens and ponies and…’
‘And whoever else comes along,’ she said, and chuckled at the look on his face.
He caught his breath. ‘You’d…’
‘I think I would,’ she said, a bubble of joy rising so fast it was threatening to overwhelm her. ‘It might be fun.’
‘You’re talking babies,’ he said, feeling his way.
‘I believe I am. You know,’ she said thoughtfully, ‘if we sold my place we could even do up your other house as
