Huge, earth-shattering mistake. On a scale of one to ten, this ranked about a hundred and forty.
Because the kiss changed everything.
Or, rather, it made everything the same again. It reminded Abbey of what she’d known for most of her life. That she loved Ryan Henry absolutely. Totally. Without question. At eight years old she’d handed her heart over to Ryan and she’d never taken it back again.
Sure, she’d loved John, but her love for John had been different. John had been her beloved friend and he and his mother had been Abbey’s family. John and Abbey had built something that was totally satisfying, but there had never been this instant linking of heart to heart, this knowledge that this was where she belonged. That she was part of this man.
Only she didn’t belong. She was no part of Ryan Henry.
The kiss was deep and wonderful and lasting, but it couldn’t last for ever. A tiny wave splashed up further than the rest, breaking over Ryan’s legs, and he drew away as if a bucket of ice water had been thrown at him rather than the tropical warmth of the sea.
As if he was shocked to the core.
‘Abbey…’
It was a hoarse whisper, full of total bewilderment, and all Abbey wanted to do was reach out and put her arms around Ryan’s broad, wet shoulders and draw him to her again. To claim him as her man.
But she didn’t. She couldn’t. This man wasn’t hers. Ryan’s life was half a world away, and the woman he was about to marry was probably on a plane, heading here, right now.
So Abbey gave a choking little laugh and managed to smile.
‘That’s… that’s enough of that, Ryan Henry,’ she faltered. ‘I know… I know it was only a kiss of friendship but even though this is a honeymoon resort your Felicity would never approve… ’
The confusion in Ryan’s eyes faded.
Felicity was his love. Not Abbey.
Felicity was his future.
Ryan closed his eyes for a long, long moment and when he opened them his face was resolute.
‘You’re right. Felicity would have pink kittens. She’d never understand that we’re just friends.’
Just friends. How hollow did that sound?
Ryan flicked Abbey’s white face with a long finger and rose to stand looking down at her. His eyes were blank and uncomprehending.
‘I’d best take Leith back to the hospital,’ he told her in a voice that was none too steady. ‘I need to check there are no problems with Steve, and then get down to see Dad in the hospital in Cairns tonight.’ Ryan bit his lip and stared out to sea, as if reluctant to leave. As he was. Who would want to leave this magic place?
Who would want to leave Abbey?
‘I’ll be back Thursday if I can,’ he told her. ‘If Steve’s managing, I’ll come and see you then. Look after yourself.’
And then, without so much as glancing at Abbey again, he walked over, collected the reluctant Leith and strode away up the beach.
End of one crazy interlude.
Before Ryan left for Cairns he managed to contact Felicity. She was just leaving one meeting and about to enter another.
‘I can ring back later,’ Ryan told her.
‘It’s OK, Ryan. There’s never going to be a good time here. I’m so busy you wouldn’t believe it. What is it?’
Ryan briefly outlined what was happening and heard Felicity frown down the phone line.
‘I guess the best course might be for us to just make our own way back to the States,’ Ryan suggested. ‘I don’t want to tie you here. We can do the marriage bit next vacation.’
More frowns. And then a decision.
‘No. I’ll come anyway,’ Felicity said decisively. ‘Let’s just get this marriage bit over fast, Ryan. It’s been hanging over us long enough. I’ll be there on Thursday. If you’re in Cairns with your father, we can meet there and take it as it comes.’
She rang off and headed for her meeting, leaving Ryan staring down at his mobile phone.
This was what he wanted, wasn’t it? That Felicity still came? That the wedding went ahead?
It had to be. It was his future, all mapped out. The future as he and his mother had planned it since he was fifteen years old.
Then why the hell did he feel so damned bleak?
CHAPTER SEVEN
ABBEY’S honeymoon lasted a week, and by the following Monday she was aching for it to be over.
Not that it hadn’t been wonderful. Abbey and Janet and Jack had had the time of their lives. Ensconced in absolute luxury, with nothing to do but enjoy themselves, it would have been churlish of them to have done anything else.
Jack had revelled in having his mother and his grandma all to himself. The child had blossomed, steadied on his plump little legs, attacked the water as if he’d been born to it and had chortled and grinned the entire time.
And Janet? The creases on Janet’s forehead had faded, and even the look of perpetual pain from her arthritis had eased. She was far fitter now for surgery than she had been a week ago, Abbey thought thankfully.
And Abbey?
Abbey was rested-sort of. It was difficult to sleep, though, lying alone in a king-sized bed with the thought of Ryan Henry’s mocking smile staying with her. After the first night Abbey hauled Jack into bed with her, hoping the toddler’s faint snoring would ease her sense of loneliness. It didn’t. Her sense of isolation stayed.
She should be used to being a widow by now, she told herself fiercely over and over again. There wasn’t room in her life for a man.
There was. If that man was Ryan Henry.
But Ryan didn’t return. There were a couple of curt phone calls, enquiring as to their welfare, but that had been all.
When Abbey had rung Cairns hospital she’d been told that Sam was ‘recovering nicely from his by-pass, thank you for your enquiry’. When she’d rung Sapphire Cove hospital Eileen had told her Ryan and Steve were coping brilliantly between them and had added, ‘Get back to your honeymoon, Abbey Winner.’
Only it was hard to do that when her heart wasn’t really here. It was hard to block out the thought of someone else doing her job. Especially when that someone was Ryan.
And Janet watched her daughter-in-law with troubled eyes and knew why the circles under Abbey’s eyes hadn’t faded.
She’d seen that kiss…
‘You’ve got everything you need?’ Abbey asked, as she stowed Janet’s hospital bag in the luggage compartment of the car. ‘Though I guess I can always bring in things afterwards. I’ll be in and out so often you’ll be sick of the sight of me.’
‘I’ve got everything I need except news that the hospital’s burned down,’ Janet said grimly. ‘Why I ever let you and Ryan talk me into this darned fool procedure… ’
‘Janet, you’ll be able to walk again. Pain-free. I promise.’
‘Yeah, and next year you’ll be at me to have the other hip done.’
‘That’s right,’ Abbey agreed serenely. She and Janet had come back to the farm to pack. Now Abbey handed
