past, and what he was facing in the future.
‘I’ll be OK,’ he quavered.
‘You’re a good kid, Robbie.’
‘Sometimes I get sick of being a good kid,’ he said rebelliously, and she winced.
‘You know something, Robbie?’
‘What?’
‘Sometimes I get sick of being a good adult, too,’ she confessed. ‘You reckon one day you and I might run away from home?’
He thought about it, but only for a moment.
‘If they close down the island, we won’t have to run away. They’ll chuck us off.’
‘There could be a good side to that. Maybe we wouldn’t have to be good any more.’
‘Yeah, but you’d just get a job somewhere else and we’d have to be good all over again,’ he told her. ‘We’d better stay here.’
‘OK.’
‘But, Morag…’
‘Mmm?’
‘I’ll stay here and be good,’ he told her. ‘But you find Hamish.’
CHAPTER SEVEN
‘ROBBIE’S taking it hard?’
Grady hadn’t said a word until they had one of the few undamaged four-wheel-drives loaded and were headed south toward the Koori settlement. He produced sandwiches and handed them to her piece by piece as she drove. She knew the way and it seemed suddenly important that she keep the illusion that she was in control. But Grady was glancing across at her as she drove, and she knew that he saw that her knuckles were white on the steering- wheel.
And one sandwich seemed enough to choke her.
‘Morag?’ he prodded gently, and she had to force herself to respond.
What had he asked? Was Robbie taking it hard? Stupid, stupid question.
‘You don’t know how much.’
‘You’ve really dug yourself deep here, haven’t you?’
‘No,’ she said tightly. ‘I haven’t dug myself anywhere. The hole’s been dug for me.’
‘You elected to come.’
‘Yeah,’ she said tightly. ‘I did.’
‘Were you happy here?’ he asked. ‘Before the wave struck.’
‘Of course I was happy. Why wouldn’t I be happy?’
‘You don’t miss Sydney?’
Oh, for heaven’s sake. What a time for an inquisition.
‘Why should I miss Sydney?’ she snapped.
‘I just thought-’
‘Well, don’t think.’ She hesitated. And then thought, No, why not say it? All these things that had built up for so long…
‘Why would I ever want to be somewhere other than here?’ she told him, her anger suddenly threatening almost to overwhelm her. ‘I like there being only three shops on the island. I like always drinking instant coffee and wearing the same clothes everyone else wears, and I like it that everyone on the island knows every single thing about my life. I like having dated the island’s only two eligible men-and deciding they weren’t so eligible after all. I like cooking our own dinner every damned night except once a month when Robbie and I treat ourselves to dinner at the pub where we have a choice of steak and chips, fish and chips or sausages and chips. I like being on call twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week and fifty-two weeks of the year. And I like it that Robbie will have to go to Sydney to board for the last few years of secondary school and he’ll probably never come back and I’ll be stuck here for ever…’
Her voice broke and she dashed an angry hand across her face. Tears? When had she last cried? Before yesterday, she couldn’t remember.
‘So if the island is declared unfit for habitation,’ Grady said cautiously into the stillness, ‘you won’t be too upset?’
She swivelled. They hit a bump on the dirt track and the truck lurched, but she didn’t notice.
‘What the hell are you talking about?’
‘The infrastructure’s been smashed. It’ll cost a bomb to fix the power and sewerage and the buildings. It’d be much cheaper for the government to pay for resettlement on the mainland.’
‘Oh, great.’
‘You don’t want to be here.’
‘I didn’t say that.’
‘I think you just did.’
‘Well, I didn’t!’ She was so angry now she was almost spitting. ‘I know. I miss things from the mainland. Of course I do. And I feel trapped. But these people… A tiny group of highlanders settled here two hundred years ago and their descendants still live here. Most of the kids now leave the island when they’re about fourteen to go to secondary school and a lot of them don’t come back. But the ones that do…they come because they want to.’
‘Maybe they feel obligated. Like you.’
‘So you’d say let’s not give them the choice?’
‘If it costs a bomb…maybe not.’
‘And the true islanders?’ she snapped. ‘The Koori? They’ve been here for thousands of years. They keep apart from the rest of the island. They speak their own language. They’re the most extraordinary artists and craftsmen. Magical. But their way of life hasn’t changed in generations. Except that they get emergency health care and inoculations.’
‘Thanks to you, and you don’t want to be here.’
‘I didn’t say that.’
‘You did.’
‘No,’ she snapped. ‘I said I missed things. I do. Of course I do. But if I truly wanted to leave, you wouldn’t see me for dust.’
‘And if you and I…’
‘What?’ She turned and faced him and the truck hit a stump in the road. The truck jerked sideways and she swore and pulled the car to a halt. Maybe driving when she was white hot with rage wasn’t such a good idea.
‘There’s still something between us, Morag,’ Grady told her. He was watching her face. Carefully. Choosing his words. ‘You know, I haven’t forgotten you. All these years… If you came back…’
It needed only that.
‘You’re saying we could take up where we left off four years ago?’
‘I didn’t realise how much I’d miss you,’ he said softly. ‘Until you left.’
She closed her eyes. After all these years. At such a time…
‘I’m sorry,’ he said gently. ‘This isn’t the time.’
‘No.’ Her eyes flew wide and she stared straight ahead at the road. Carefully she steered back from the verge, keeping careful rein on her fury. ‘No, it’s not.’ Then, very carefully, thinking it through, she said, ‘Grady, when you came here, were you told to start preparing us for full evacuation?’
‘I-’
‘I know it’s early,’ she said. ‘The focus is on searching. But there’s a huge number of troops on the island now, yet the main road’s still blocked. And I was talking to one of the men who’s been working on the gas main. He was telling me that they’d succeeded in blocking it completely. Now, that might just be temporary, for safety…’
‘It is.’