The Edge Of Courage

Rocco folded his arms, standing where she had left him, glowering at the man who now held her. The couples had to move around him on the floor. A low buzz began in his ears. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Ivy leave their table and approach him. The movement of the dance brought Mandy and Rodeo past him as Ivy came even with him. Neither one looked at him as they danced by.

“What’s goin’ on, Rocco?” Ivy asked. He didn’t answer, just kept his eyes on Mandy. She followed his gaze. “Oh. Ooohhh! C’mon back to the table. He’ll bring her over when the dance ends.”

Rocco didn’t move.

“Would you like to dance with me?” Ivy offered.

Rocco did look at her then. He wondered when Kit had last seen her. She didn’t wear a wedding band. Would that please or torture his friend?

“I can’t dance with you.”

“Why?” she asked.

“It’s complicated.”

“Then come back to the table. If Bobby bothers Mandy, I promise I’ll kick his ass for you so that you don’t have to.”

“No you won’t. That pleasure will be all mine.”

She smiled at him, and he felt some of his disdain for her melt away. As they headed back to the table, he wished Kit were here, having this evening with her.

When the song ended, Rocco got out of the booth to let them in. Mandy’s cheeks were rosy, her eyes shining. Rocco hated that another man had given her that glow. Mandy scooted in next to him, pushing her body up against his, touching him from thigh to hip to shoulder. He looked down at her, trying to see if her closeness meant Bobby had insulted her in some way. She met his gaze and smiled, the look in her eyes meant for him alone.

The waitress came with their food, temporarily interrupting other treks to the dance floor. He took a couple of bites, mostly so that no one would make a big deal of his not eating. Officer Jerry and Rodeo were having a heated debate about baseball pitchers-a subject he couldn’t contribute to having been out of the country for so long. He hadn’t kept up with any of the teams or their star players. He pushed the food around on his plate until Mandy’s hand squeezed his thigh.

He looked at her. She was making a show of biting the food off her fork. She nodded toward his plate. He didn’t take the bait. Instead, he watched her chew, watched her swallow, waited for her to take another bite, all the while remembering their first dinner together when she’d fed him. As soon as she realized what he was doing, a blush slowly stole up her neck. He grinned, pleased that the color was for him and not Rodeo.

“Hey, guys-I need to make a run to the lady’s room,” Ivy announced a short while later when everyone had finished eating. “Can I bother you to let me out?” Rocco scooted out of the booth with Mandy and Rodeo to let Ivy out. She grabbed hold of Mandy’s hand and pulled her along with her. Once inside the restroom she faced Mandy. “What are you doing here?”

“In the restroom? Or at Winchester’s? You wanted to meet Rocco, remember?”

“Yes. And God, he is sex on a stick. Why are you still here? That man can’t take his eyes off of you.”

Mandy shrugged. “It’s not what you think.”

“Yes, it is. Go home and get laid.”

“Ivy! You’re incorrigible!”

“No, I’m not. It’s been a long time since a man looked at me the way Rocco does you. Don’t waste that. You saw him stay on the dance floor after you went off with Bobby, didn’t you?”

“Yes.” Mandy smiled. “He looked really angry.”

“He was really angry. You should put that energy to use-take him home and soil the sheets.”

Mandy sighed. “It won’t work. He doesn’t like to be touched. You saw he wouldn’t shake hands with anyone when we got here.”

“You’ve had your hands all over him tonight. He didn’t seem to mind.”

Mandy thought about that for a minute. “He didn’t, did he?”

“If I were you, I wouldn’t be wasting another minute here when I could be home alone with him.”

“I don’t know, Ivy. I haven’t been with anyone in a long time.”

Ivy squelched that argument. “Silly girl, it all still works the same.”

Rocco pulled the truck to a stop in front of the main house a short while later. Mandy gave him a smile, but did not move to get out. She’d had two beers-surely not enough to incapacitate her, was it? he wondered. By the time he came around to her side, she’d opened her door and had pivoted to sit with her boot heels braced on the door’s ledge. “Did you have fun tonight, Rocco?”

“I enjoyed our dance.” That had been the only thing he’d enjoyed. He wasn’t up on recent sports news and teams, so he couldn’t contribute to the guys’ conversations about baseball or basketball. The only politics he was familiar with were the bad decisions coming out of Kabul and policy fluctuations in Washington. He didn’t have plans for the summer, other than keeping Mandy safe and then going back for his son. He’d been a lousy addition to their party.

“I enjoyed that, too,” she agreed.

He reached for her waist, carefully lifting her so that she wouldn’t bump her head as he helped her from the truck. He didn’t release her. “I didn’t enjoy that bottom-feeder, Bobby.”

“He’s not a bottom-feeder. And we’re not seeing each other anymore. What about you? Is there a special girl waiting for you somewhere?”

Only Kadisha, who likely was waiting in hell for him. He dropped his hands and stepped back, setting a little space between them. He shook his head and shoved the truck door shut. “There’s no one.”

“How long has it been?” she asked in a voice that had gone low, husky. God, was he hearing her correctly? Was she asking what he thought she was asking?

“How long since when? Since I had a woman, or had one I wanted to have?”

“I didn’t think there was a difference.”

Kadisha had been expecting their second child. How long ago he’d been with her? He’d run out of excuses to avoid their marriage bed last summer. The women in the village were talking about his lack of interest in his wife. He’d been so focused on her father. Perhaps that had been his undoing. He’d made Kadisha love him, then cut her loose, thinking the ruse was in place. He’d never thought it needed care and feeding.

“There is when your life isn’t your own.”

Mandy stood in front of him in the bluish moonlight, waiting for a sign from him. His hand shook as he lifted it to her face. He’d touched her a few times tonight without repercussions. He knew he was pushing his luck, touching her one more time, but he was unable to deny himself the pleasure. He drew his fingers down her cheek, feeling the downy soft skin at the side of her face. He caught the stray strands of her hair and pushed them back with the others behind her head.

“Do you want me, Rocco?”

Jesus H. Christ, did he want her. It was as if she, alone, brought him the air he breathed. If he stepped away from her, he would suffocate. He forked his hand through her hair until he cupped the back of her head. He drew her closer to his body, close enough that he could feel her warmth, almost sense the percussion of her heartbeat in the air between them. He bent toward her, low enough to catch the breath from her parted lips against his mouth. He waited, hovering close, feeling the rhythm of her life force.

“I want you,” he whispered against her mouth. “I have since I first laid eyes on you.” He looked into her eyes, moving his head so that the moonlight fell across her face. Her eyes looked black. A trick of the light, no doubt. A trick he felt in his groin. Her hands touched his waist, then moved slowly, cautiously, up his chest. He was barely aware he and Mandy were moving in a slow rotation, circling each other, letting the light from the moon play against one, then the other, as if they danced to silent music that hummed between them.

Her hand moved up to his shoulder, across his collarbone, to his neck. A muscle in his jaw bunched as his dick responded to the feel of her palm against his skin. She caressed his jaw, his cheek, his temple.

“Your eyes are unbelievably sad, Rocco. Why?”

“Don’t ask me questions I can’t answer.”

“Make love to me.”

Words failed him. He could only nod.