“Then tell me, Frank, what were you doing in his chambers?” He raised an eyebrow. I had his attention.
“Looking for answers.”
He stared at me a moment, and then waved Poe out of the room. Once the mentalist was gone, Baalth sighed. “I read the letters you threw at me. It seems, perhaps, it might well be time to tell you the truth.”
Long past, but I kept that little comment to myself and sat quietly waiting for him to continue. I couldn’t keep the anger from warming my cheeks, though.
“Those letters are just a glimpse into the complicated relationship between Charlotte and Lucifer.”
“I’d like to hear the rest of the story.”
“Doubtful, but since you’re as stubborn as Lucifer, I know you won’t rest until you do.” He leaned forward and set his elbows on the desk, steepling his fingers before him. “It begins well before the snippet you stumbled across. Lucifer and Arol had long disagreed about the politics of Hell. After centuries of muted conflict, it had come to blows, Arol fleeing the Demonarch for the relative peace of Earth, as it was at the time. For years he wandered, living amongst the humans until he found a cause to settle in a tiny village in the Siberian tundra. That reason was your mother.”
I felt my stomach tighten, a sourness churning inside, but I pushed it aside so I could pay attention to what Baalth was telling me.
“The two were married under the auspices of the village elders, and you were born a short time after.” He smiled. “You were much cuter back then.”
“Azrael told me Arol wasn’t my father,” I said, ignoring Baalth’s attempt to lighten the mood.
“Azrael lies.”
My guts grumbled and twisted like roiling serpents. A sick knot formed as I listened.
“That angel was a major part of the reason your mother ended up dead. Though Arol had formed a family and left the politics of Hell behind, he could not let his feud with Lucifer go. It ate at him until he was forced to do something or be devoured by it. This is where Azrael comes in.
“Unable to defeat his brother on his own, Arol recruited Azrael to help bring Lucifer down. Arol would gain control of Hell, deposing his brother. Azrael would win God’s favor and that of the new lord of the underworld. Not bad friends to have. But Lucifer learned of their plan to overthrow him and confronted Azrael. The angel was cowed and confessed all that Arol had in store. Lucifer bound the angel to him and kept him close.”
I stood and took a deep breath, pacing in front of the desk, hoping to ease the strange feelings that had come over me as I listened to Baalth.
“Are you okay?” he asked.
“Nerves, I think.” Despite wanting to hear every sordid detail, I wasn’t sure I was up for it, but I knew better than to stop Baalth when he was so willing to tell me. “Go on, I’m fine.”
He nodded. “Furious at his brother for daring to continue the conflict he believed settled, Lucifer struck first. Seeing no point in killing Arol, for the truly dead do not suffer, your uncle thought it best to wound your father where it would hurt him the most; in his heart. Lucifer turned Charlotte away from Arol, and set the people of his new home against him. While your mother and you were hidden, your father was chased from the village and left on his own once more.
“Never a kind man, not even to Charlotte, Arol laid waste to the village and set it alight, his fury stealing the last of his reason from him. He vowed to ruin Lucifer and go to war with Hell. Meanwhile, your mother learned of what he’d done to her village and family, and forswore their marriage. Grateful to Lucifer for having saved you both from the cruelties of Arol, she fell in love with him…after a time. Feeling obligated to protect the two of you from his brother, Lucifer saw to your protection personally. It was during this time that he learned what Arol had seen in your mother, and he too fell for her charms.”
“Did they have a child?” The question burst out of my mouth before I could stop it.
“No, though there were rumors of such,” he answered, shaking his head with confidence. “Lucifer dared not produce an heir. Longinus sat with the mantle of the Anti-Christ, and your uncle knew no child of his would survive to inherit the throne.”
“But the letter-“
“The letter you read was likely some small source of the rumors, as was your mother herself. Charlotte believed she was pregnant, at one point, but it was not so. For all their attachment, Lucifer was still betrothed to Lilith and he knew she would be the first to murder Charlotte were such a breeding to occur.”
My head reeled, white dots sparkling before my eyes. I dropped into the chair. A cold sweat broke out across my skin.
Baalth went on, undeterred. “As for your father, despite his bloodline, he was poorly suited to offer a true threat to Lucifer’s rule. He spent the next decade learning this cruel truth.”
“But he found my mother.”
“He did, at last, yes. Once more he could thank Azrael. As Lucifer became more and more distracted by Arol’s attempts at overthrowing Hell, Azrael saw the opportunity for revenge and to salvage his pride. He snuck away and made plans with Arol. As your father’s army massed and struck at Lucifer, Azrael led Arol to your mother.”
I leaned forward in the chair. Though I knew the aftermath of what had happened, I knew nothing of the details. “And?”
“Are you sure you want to hear this? You know well enough the cruelty of your bloodline…is it necessary to relive it?”
“Just tell me,” I blurted before I could talk myself out of it.
Baalth sighed and went on. “Arol found your mother in the barn. Azrael as a witness, your father raped her violently, viciously, showing her no mercy in flesh or spirit. You were out in the fields and Arol knew he had time. He took advantage of it. He spent the day violating Charlotte, butchering her before he was done.” His dark eyes met mine. “You know the rest.”
I covered my mouth as bile burned at the back of my throat. Memories flooded my mind and I relived the moment. I’d found my mother hacked apart in the barn. The hay scattered across the floor was stained red with her blood, the walls, the ceiling. Only her head was still recognizable, but just barely. The agony carved into her gentle face still fuels my nightmares.
Sickened by the images screaming across my mind’s eyes, I jumped up and stumbled through the labyrinth of collectibles and out past the counter. I barely noticed Poe as I did, and then I was outside the store. Sweating and weak, I staggered down the street. At a nearby alley, I turned and went down it, emptying my stomach behind a rusted trash dumpster, out of sight.
I stayed there a while, until I started feeling stupid for reacting so foolishly. This was the second time I’d spewed my guts, and there wasn’t anything in me but a couple sips of beer. I dropped against the dumpster and took a moment to catch my breath.
The stories Azrael and Baalth told didn’t match exactly, but there was enough similarity between them as to make it impossible to tell who was lying. Normally I’d trust Baalth to be more honest, but like Lucifer, Baalth had kept the story a secret. He’d never told me any of it until I stumbled across a piece of evidence he couldn’t deny. Where did that leave me? Was Baalth lying, or was Azrael? Or both? That could easily be the case, which only left me fucked and even more out in the cold when it came to the truth.
No idea who to believe, I’d only confused myself by trying to find the answers to who I was and where I belonged. I missed the old days when Lucifer and God were still here. It was their job to keep the world straight. I sure as shit didn’t want it.
The more I thought about it, the more I realized I probably didn’t want to know the truth. Life is easier when you’re in the dark. Ignorance equals bliss, or so they say. If that was true, then I wanted a big, heaping slab o’ ignorance to go, please. Top that off with a case of Jack Daniels and I’d be all right.
I got up and left the alley, leaving my spew behind. I didn’t want anything else to do with the past, right then. All I wanted was to spend some time in the present with Karra. We could make our own history and forget the garbage we’d crawled through to get here.
I’d eaten enough shit in my life. It was time to try another flavor.
Chapter Eleven
