The Secret of Excalibur

Chase looked innocent. ‘Can’t comment on military operations I may or may not have carried out in a hostile sovereign state . . . but, yeah, I do know how to ride a camel.’

Mitchell nodded. ‘Funnily enough, so do I.’

‘Er, hello, hi,’ Nina said. ‘I don’t.’

‘It’s a doddle,’ Chase assured her. ‘Just as easy as riding a horse.’

‘Which I don’t know how to do either!’

Chase went to the nearest kneeling camel and stroked its forehead. It eyed him, then shook its head lazily and made a noise somewhere between a grunt and a yawn. ‘Good lad,’ said Chase, moving back and swinging a leg over the broad padded saddle behind the camel’s single hump. He gathered up the leather reins, then gently tugged on them, calling, ‘Heya, heya!’ The camel shook its head again, then obediently unfolded its legs and rose to its full height.

Nina had seen camels in zoos, but only now fully realised just how large they were. Standing, the animal was considerably taller than her, and Chase’s head was at least eleven feet off the ground. ‘Okay, that’s . . . that’s quite big.’

Under Chase’s guidance, the camel trotted towards her, bowing its head for a closer look. She leaned back nervously. ‘Does Attayak speak English?’ she asked Karima, who replied in the negative. ‘Oh, good. Because this really, really smells. It smells bad.’

‘Oh, you’ll hardly notice it after a few hours,’ Chase said cheerfully. He backed the camel away, then with another command and flick of the reins prompted it to kneel so he could dismount. He and Mitchell retrieved the group’s belongings from the back of the Land Rover and loaded them into the animals’ saddlebags.

‘Here,’ said Mitchell, handing Chase a pistol. ‘Thought you’d find this useful.’

Chase nodded approvingly. ‘Ruger P95,’ he said, quickly and expertly checking the weapon before loading it. Mitchell did the same with his own Ruger. ‘Not bad. I still miss my Wildey, though.’

‘You had a Wildey?’

‘Yeah, a .45 Winchester Magnum. Until some bastard used it to assassinate a government minister and put the blame on me. It’s probably still in an evidence locker in Botswana somewhere. Good gun. You ever used one?’

‘God, no,’ said Mitchell, shaking his head vehemently. ‘Bulky, heavy, limited ammo capacity, insane amounts of recoil? I’ll stick with something that’s actually practical. And you know,’ he went on, a teasing glint in his eye, ‘I’m sure you could draw some psychological inference from a man using a gun with an eight-inch-long barrel.’

‘Well, I wouldn’t expect a navy man to know anything about proper guns,’ Chase replied with a scowl. ‘The recoil’s no problem if you’re not limp-wristed . . .’

‘Now, now, boys,’ said Nina, stepping between them. ‘Enough with the inter-service rivalry.’

‘Yeah, I suppose,’ Chase said grudgingly. He looked at Mitchell. ‘At least you weren’t in the air force!’ Both men laughed at that.

‘We should get moving,’ said Karima, tipping her head towards the setting sun. ‘We’ll cross the border before nightfall, and then we’ll set up camp.’

The camels loaded, Karima said her farewells to Attayak before mounting one. Nina regarded her own slobbering beast with trepidation. Though the smallest of the four, it was still almost eye to eye with her even while kneeling. ‘Y’know, maybe I’ll just jog alongside it.’

‘Ah, get on there,’ said Chase. ‘You’ll be fine. All you’ve got to do is not fall off.’

‘Don’t worry, Nina,’ Mitchell assured her. ‘Camels really are very easy to ride. You’ll get the hang of it in fifteen minutes.’

‘And how many times will I fall off in those fifteen minutes?’ she asked.

‘You won’t fall off. Here, let me help you get on.’

He held out a hand, but Chase hurriedly interposed himself. ‘Nah, I’ve got her. Just get your leg over.’ He cackled at the double entendre. Nina tsked and warily hoisted herself over the saddle, gripping it tightly as the animal shifted position beneath her. ‘You sorted?’

‘If I say no, can I get off ?’ The saddle was actually more padded than Nina had expected, but its width forced her legs uncomfortably wide. Chase gave her the reins; she took them in one hand while keeping the other firmly clenched round the raised front of the saddle. ‘So what do I do now - aaah!’ she cried as Chase barked a command and slapped the camel’s rump, and she found herself being pitched back and forth as it clambered to its feet. ‘Whoa, I’m slipping!’

‘Squeeze your legs tighter,’ Mitchell suggested.

‘I can’t, they’re open so wide it feels like I’m being split in half - and don’t you even think about coming out with some horrible innuendo!’ she warned Chase.

‘Would I?’ said Chase, clapping a hand to his chest in feigned offence as he walked back to his own waiting camel. ‘She says that every night,’ he added in a stage whisper as he hopped on to the saddle.

‘Eddie, I am so going to kill you!’

‘You’ll have to catch me first! Heya!’ He tugged the reins, and his camel set off at a trot. Nina’s animal followed suit, bouncing her on the saddle with every step.

‘Eddie-ee-ee-ee-ee!’

The last faint red glow on the western skyline had faded, the diamond shimmering of starlight taking its place overhead. The four camels were kneeling again, lined up near the small campfire opposite a pair of collapsible tents, grunting and mumbling to each other in contented camelese as Karima fed them.

Mitchell, sitting beside Nina at the fire, glanced over at Karima. ‘So, Eddie, just how many women do you have stashed away around the world ready to help you out? First Mitzi, now Karima . . .’

Chase, on Nina’s other side, shrugged. ‘A few.’

‘More than a few,’ said Nina. She began counting on her fingers. ‘Let’s see, there’s Shala, Maria, TD, Mitzi, Karima . . . and those are just the ones I’ve met!’

Chase shrugged again, smirking. ‘What can I say? Women can’t resist me.’ He put an arm round Nina’s shoulders and pulled her to him. ‘And that’s before they experience the thrill of the Chase. If you know what I mean.’ He leered at her.

‘Everyone knows what you mean, Eddie,’ Nina chided, pushing him away. ‘All the time.’

‘Tchah!’

‘Yeah, subtlety and the army never really mix, whatever country you’re from. No offence,’ Mitchell added with a grin as Chase glowered at him. He turned to Nina. ‘So what about you? You got dozens of hunks all over the world waiting for your call?’

She shook her head. ‘Afraid not.’

‘Good,’ Mitchell said quietly, smiling again. ‘But you’re not jealous of Eddie’s ladyfriends, I take it.’

‘No, I’m used to it by now. I know that Eddie’s got a past - even if he never tells me about any of it,’ she said pointedly. Chase grunted. ‘But after everything we’ve been through, I know I can trust him.’

‘You’ve been through quite a lot, from what I’ve heard. Saving New York, finding the Tomb of Hercules, discovering Atlantis . . .’

‘I know! I’m sometimes amazed we’re both still alive. But it’s how we met.’

‘Ah,’ said Mitchell, nodding knowingly.

Chase regarded him suspiciously. ‘“Ah”? “Ah” what?’

‘Just that, well, considering how different you are, I wondered how you’d got together. But I guess that sharing a really intense experience is one way to break the ice, huh?’

‘You could say that,’ Nina answered. ‘Although your approach of bonding over a Monty Python movie was definitely more like how I’d expected to meet someone. You said you met your wife at college?’

‘Ex-wife.’ Mitchell indicated his empty ring finger.

‘Oh, I’m sorry.’

‘It’s okay.’ He looked away, at the crackling fire. ‘It was one of those two-careers-on-different-paths things -