The Dingo Dilemma

'If he had his way, he'd love to, but I put my foot down. He's putting on weight, getting soft. I said, 'No bloody lunch until you shape up. Personal trainer for you, my boy.''

She eyed me. 'You could do with the services of a personal trainer, yourself.'

This was a bit much, as Ursula was scarcely sylph-like. 'Thanks for the advice,' I said, 'but I'm quite happy the way I am.'

'Bloody hell, are you? You're not going to hit the big time with that attitude. The entertainment industry is ruthless, you know.'

'Well, actually-' I began, but Ursula was gazing past me, a pleased smile on her face.

'There's Roddy, head of Bellina Studios. He'll never forgive me if I don't drop over and have a word with him.' She got to her feet and waved enthusiastically. 'Yoo-hoo!'

From the expression on his face, Roddy was not looking forward to their meeting anywhere near as much as Ursula was.

'Ursula's a monster,' said Pauline as we watched her trundling towards her hapless victim, 'but she has her uses. We struck a deal. She gets me in to see Earl Garfield, and in return I guarantee that Dustin's invited to every A-list party Glowing Bodies coordinates for the next two months.'

'But won't Garfield simply refuse to see you?'

Pauline shook her head emphatically. Her hair could have been black lacquer, as not one strand of it moved. 'He can't and he won't. The ratings for Darken Come Home are dropping and the vultures are circling. Variety is openly questioning if Garfield still has the magic touch. When the trades run stories like that it means the guy's in real trouble.'

'If that's so, doesn't he lose his value as far as wrangling is concerned?'

'Not at all. Everyone likes to see a giant fall, and the harder, the better.' Pauline smiled with malice as she added, 'Except his ex-wives, of course. They have no interest in Earl Garfield failing.'

Frankly, I couldn't see how any normal person could bring herself to marry a bloke like him. 'How many wives has he had?'

'His fourth's in the process of divorcing him. The rumor is she has a generous prenuptial. Such a pity that after all that suffering, she won't get much of a pay day. She could get lucky-Garfield's resurrected dying shows before, and the best thing Darleen has going for it is Dustin Jaeger's popularity.'

She laughed at my expression. 'Sure, in person he's a self-serving little swine with an outsize ego, but in the American heartland, he's Timmy, the son they always wanted. That's why Garfield isn't going to stand up to Ursula. Oh, he'll huff and he'll puff, but in the end he'll roll over.'

'Roll over enough to be wrangled?' I asked, thinking what an obnoxious guest he'd make at any function.

Pauline beamed at me confidently. 'You can take it to the bank.'

'Does it matter that the bloke's likely to insult everyone he meets?'

'Honey, he can drop his pants and moon the celebrities, for all I care. Getting Earl Garfield to actually appear has long been regarded in my business as an impossibility. I'll be a legend in this town!'

I saw that Ursula Jaeger was heading back in our direction, on the way stopping at every second table to meet and greet. Conscious that I might not get another opportunity to ask Pauline about Lonnie, I said casually, 'Lonnie was telling me he was at the Moonlight Reconnaissance launch on Saturday night.'

'It was a stellar occasion,' Pauline enthused. 'You have to understand, male fragrances are a challenge. You have to bring in the heavyweights to give the product masculine legitimacy. Athletes like Oscar, Barry, Kobe are essential, plus a smattering of older, established stars like Jack, Warren, and Tom. And trendsetters, of course- Nick, Simon, and Justin.'

'Lonnie said he had a bonzer time.'

She smiled indulgently. 'It's a universe he's never experienced before.' She waved to a waiter. 'Over here! We haven't got all day.'

Crikey, this was hard. I tried for a girl-sharing-confidence tone. 'Lonnie's very fond of you.'

'Sweet guy. Not worldly, but sweet.'

'I'd hate to see him get hurt.'

'Hurt? We're having fun. Haven't you heard how opposites attract?'

'So you don't see this as a long-term relationship?'

Pauline hooted. 'Oh, please! With Lonnie?”

****

I left Pauline and Ursula still eating and set off for the Darken soundstage. Outside the commissary Unity and Upton were snoozing in a patch of shade. The bloke's brooding expression had appreciably deepened. 'Is Pauline coming soon?' he asked.

'Couldn't say, I'm afraid.'

He nodded gloomily. 'I knew this was too good to be true.'

He seemed to want to share his pain, so I said, 'What was?'

''Come with me to Bellina Studios,' Pauline said. She promised to introduce me to people who'd put my acting career on the fast track. And here I am, minding her dogs.'

I was fast deciding Lonnie would be much better off without Pauline Feeney in his life-not that I expected him to agree with me. On the way to the soundstage I rehearsed how I'd break the news that Pauline didn't care for him in the way he wished.

When a call came through on my cell phone, I hoped it might be Ariana. It was Quip.

'Are you home tonight?' he asked urgently.

'Yes, why?'

'It's Yancy. He's got some sensational stuff to give me. Would you let him through the gate to the alley?'

'The back gate? Why?'

'He can't be seen. Yancy says he fears for his life.'

Sixteen

I was getting used to the bustle of the soundstage. I stood to one side watching as they set up the next scene to be shot, where Timmy and Olive meet for the first time. Darleen's role was simple, as she was only required to sit beside Timmy and, as we spoke our lines, look intelligently from him to me-accomplished by her trainer signaling off camera-then get up and greet me as a member of the family at the end of the scene.

Earl Garfield was nearby, considerably calmer than this morning. Perhaps he'd popped a handful of tranquillizers for lunch. He was talking to Dingo, who was frowning heavily as he listened. Darleen was on a lead, and had fallen asleep at Dingo's feet.

Seeing Dingo made me think of the two blokes who'd been at his building and had then come to Kendall & Creeling claiming to be from Homeland Security. When Bob had shown Quip the photos Lonnie had taken, Quip had said he was sure they weren't the ones who'd attacked him. Lonnie hadn't yet been successful establishing whether Unwin and Morgan were Homeland Security or not, because he'd been rebuffed with the stern admonition that it was classified information, and to release it would only give aid to America's enemies.

This official obstruction had only resulted in making Lonnie more determined and he was now hot on the trail of the limousine that I'd seen in our parking area.

A sneering voice broke into my thoughts. 'Making a move from private investigation to acting, are you?'

I didn't need to look around to know it was Norris Blainey. 'G'day,' I said. 'Fancy meeting you here.'

He was dressed as I'd first seen him, in a beautifully tailored dark suit, white shirt, and red silk tie, none of which disguised the fact he was a little shrimp of a fellow with a weak chin.

'I hope you and your partner have given some serious thought to my offer,' he said.

I didn't hide my impatience. 'You know perfectly well we've rejected it. You'd better get used to the fact you can't make an offer we'd accept.'