Mistletoe Mommy

crated Ellie, punctuated by isolated squabbles. But none of that was as bad as Adam’s hollow feeling, as if he’d left part of himself in Mistletoe. Namely, his heart.

Luckily the kids all seemed to be in high spirits, excited to tell their mom and friends all about their vacation, so he tried to use that to bolster his own mood. It worked mostly, right up until the time they passed the Welcome to Tennessee sign and Eliza burst into tears.

“What now,” Geoff muttered, rolling his eyes in the front seat.

Eliza didn’t seem to notice. “You were right, Dad. I am a selfish brat!”

“Uh…” Adam searched his memory bank. “I’m pretty sure I didn’t say that.” Had he? Sara would kill him. He was pretty sure name-calling fell under the heading of Bad Parenting.

But then, so did losing your youngest child.

“At Kerrigan Farms,” Eliza insisted. “It’s what you said, more or less.”

“I think sometimes you can act selfishly,” he said, choosing his words carefully. “The same is true of everyone. Work harder to make good choices, and take other people’s feelings into consideration. What is this about, Liza?”

“Your feelings. And Ms. Pierce’s. I was so upset when Bobby liked that other girl.”

Bobby the punk lifeguard? Adam waited, not sure where his daughter was going with her line of reasoning. Assuming there was one.

“But you must feel a billion times worse leaving Brenna! I never should have yelled at the two of you.”

“I agree that you overreacted the other day, and if you’re feeling badly about what you said, maybe you could send her a note of apology. But don’t beat yourself up too much. We were always going to leave Mistletoe. Brenna knew that.” Had seemed to accept it more easily than he had, as a matter-of-fact. “We never had a real future.”

“But she loves you,” Eliza sobbed. “I messed up everything! You could have been happy, like Mom and Dan.”

His mind flashed to Sara and Dan’s wedding, only it was himself he pictured, Brenna’s face beneath the ivory veil. And it was all too easy to picture the two of them away on a tropical honeymoon.

“Let’s not blow everything out of proportion,” he said, his caution more for himself than his daughter. “Brenna cared about me, she cared about all of us, but ‘love’ is a strong-”

“I’m not being melodramatic! She said it this morning. She said she loved you and was a better person because of it.”

Adam’s heartbeat exploded in his ears. For a second he felt so dizzy he worried about driving safely. Taking a deep breath, he maneuvered the car over to the shoulder of the road.

“You’re sure?” he asked his daughter. He had difficulty letting himself believe it, but maybe it wasn’t so farfetched.

After all, he’d fallen in love with her.

“Eliza, what else did she say?”

BRENNA SAT with Quinn and Arianne Waide on Quinn’s front porch, battling the suspicion that she’d been invited to their girls’ night because Quinn felt sorry for her. But coming here to vent over margaritas had sounded a damn sight better than staying home and wallowing. Since the clients who’d scheduled their vacation to coincide with the Fourth of July were home now, she didn’t even have a busy work schedule to take her mind off things.

Things? Way to deflect, Bren. There was only one “thing” on her mind. Dr. Adam Varner.

“We’ve lost her,” Ari told Quinn in a mock whisper.

“Thinking about the handsome doc again?” Quinn asked sympathetically.

“Yes.” There was no point in denying it.

Ari ran her finger around the rim of her glass, bringing the salt to her lips. “I’m sorry I never got to meet him. Our entire family has been so wrapped up with the new baby. Was the surgeon really that hot?”

“Yes,” Quinn and Brenna chorused.

Brenna raised her eyebrows.

Quinn chuckled. “Well, he was.”

“These summer-lovin’ flings never end well,” Ari said, the sage tone a bit humorous coming from a twenty- three-year-old. “Grease being the exception that proves the rule.”

“The worst part is he was a good guy,” Quinn said. “If he had any decency, he would have done something hateful so we could sit here and bash him, which might make you feel better, Brenna.”

“No, I knew from day one that he would be leaving. And I knew his kids needed to be his top priority. That’s one of the things I admired about him even.”

Quinn shrugged. “Then I’m afraid all I’ve got is the chestnut about it being better to have loved and lost than to-”

“Oh, please!” Arianne was aghast. “I always thought that dumb saying applied only to wimpy women. I say if you love them, track their butts down.”

Quinn looked equal parts fascinated and horrified. “Ari, I think any guy you ever set your sights on should be a little afraid.”

Tuning out their banter, Brenna allowed herself to consider, just for a second, what “tracking him down” would entail. A long-distance relationship? To what end? Even if she thought they were suited to that-and she suspected she wasn’t, while he’d flat-out said he didn’t want that-where would it lead? The more time she spent in Mistletoe, the deeper the roots of her company. Besides, as she’d learned after going away to college, this was home. She’d gone too long without one to give it up lightly. Whereas Adam had a cardiac practice and the three most important people in the world to him grounding him in Knoxville.

No, it was best that they’d parted ways cleanly. The most she could do now was try to learn from what happened between them. Maybe, eventually, she could honor her feelings for him by being more open to relationships in the future. Unfortunately, as hard as she tried, she couldn’t imagine being happy with a “next” guy. Her heart already knew the guy it wanted.

SARA INSISTED that Adam at least stay for dinner before heading home. “You’ve been on the road for hours. Stay, please.”

The kids had enthusiastically cheered this idea, so he’d capitulated. He couldn’t get that excited about going home to his empty place, anyway. He found himself absurdly grateful for the cat. She would help mitigate the solitude-plus, she was a reminder of Brenna. After dinner Geoff disappeared into his room to call Gina, Eliza booted up her computer to message her friends and Dan went to tuck in a very tired Morgan.

“So.” Sara propped an elbow on the table, leaning her chin on her fist. “Some trip, huh?”

“I am so sorry about Morgan getting lost like that. I swear I-”

“Adam. I don’t blame you for that. We’ve never endured anything on quite that scale, but there have been moments. Do you remember when Eliza was about her age and I told you how much I panicked when I looked around a department store and didn’t see her?’

He was startled. “No.” That seemed like something he should remember.

“Oh. Well, it turned out she thought it would be funny to play hide-and-seek and had dropped to the floor, crawling into a rack of clothes. She was only gone for a minute or two before I realized what had happened, but for that minute…”

“Thank you.” After all the times he’d given Sara reason to be frustrated with his parenting efforts, or lack thereof, he deeply appreciated her trying to make him feel like he was a good father.

She suddenly grinned, mischievous. “I want to hear more about this Brenna.”

His face actually warmed. Oh, brother. Was he blushing in front of his ex? He’d managed to head off the moment at dinner when Eliza had started to share that Brenna “loved” him, but he hadn’t done so quickly or gracefully enough to deter Sara’s interest.

What the hell, he might as well tell her about Brenna. If he didn’t, she’d hear all about her from the kids, anyway.

“She’s amazing. It’s like she gave everyone exactly what they needed. A cat for Morgan, the pride of employee responsibility for Geoff, womanly advice for Eliza-just until we were able to get you on the phone,” he added quickly.

“What about you? What did she give you that you needed?”