the gods who have protected the Ch’ing Dynasty for generations. Be careful what you do, girls. Make sure you never distract or offend the spirits.”
On our way down the hill Shim took us along another path, which led to the Garden of Peace and Longevity. It was the first time I had seen real pippala trees. They were gigantic and their leaves were as green as fresh grass. I had seen pictures of them in Buddhist manuscripts and temple frescoes. They were considered the symbol of Buddha and were rare. Here such trees, hundreds of years old, were everywhere. Their leaves draped the ground like green curtains. In the garden, large, beautiful stones had been arranged in a pattern pleasing to the eye. When I raised my eyes, I saw magnificent pavilions hidden in the cypresses.
After many turns I lost my sense of direction. We must have passed about twenty pavilions before we were finally led to a bluish one carved with plum flowers. It had a snail-shaped roof inlaid with blue tiles.
“The Pavilion of Winter Blossom,” Chief Eunuch Shim pointed out. “Here lives the Grand Empress Lady Jin. You are going to meet both Majesties soon.”
We were told to sit on stone benches while Shim gave us a quick lesson in the expected etiquette. Each of us was to speak a simple line, wishing His and Her Majesties health and longevity. “After expressing the wish, remain silent and answer only when you are spoken to.”
Nervousness spread among us. One girl started to cry uncontrollably. She was immediately taken away by eunuchs. Another girl began mumbling to herself. She too was taken out.
I became aware of the constant presence of eunuchs. Most of the time they stood against the walls, silent and expressionless. Big Sister Fann had warned me that the experienced eunuchs were dreadful and that they fed on others’ misfortune. “The young ones are better,” she had said, “especially the newcomers, who are still innocent. The eunuchs’ nastiness doesn’t show until they reach adulthood, when they realize the significance of their loss.”
According to Big Sister Fann, the powerful eunuchs ran the Forbidden City. They were masters of intrigue. Because they had suffered a great deal, they had amazing endurance for pain and torture. The newcomers were beaten with whips daily. Before taking their boys to the palace, the parents of eunuchs purchased three pieces of cowhide. The new eunuchs would wrap the hide around their back and thighs to cover where the whip would land. The cowhide was nicknamed “the Real Buddha.”
Later on I would learn that the penalty for the most serious transgressions by the eunuchs was death by stifling. The punishment would be carried out in front of all the eunuchs. The convicted eunuch would be tied to a bench with his face covered with a piece of wet silk. The process was similar to mask-making. With everyone watching, the executioners would add wet cloths, layer after layer, while the victim struggled to breathe. The eunuch’s limbs would be held down until he ceased struggling.
During my early life in the Forbidden City, I cursed such punishments. I was appalled by their cruelty. Over the years my view gradually changed. I found the discipline a necessity. The eunuchs were capable of grand crimes and equal cruelty. The anger they harbored was so uncontrollable that only death could contain it. In ancient times eunuchs had incited riots and worse. During the Chou Dynasty the eunuchs had burned down an entire palace.
According to Big Sister Fann, when a clever eunuch worked his way up and became the Imperial favorite, as Shim had, he would live his life under one person but above the nation. It was this possibility not only of survival but also of becoming a legend that yearly led more than fifty thousand poor families in China to send their boys to the capital.
From Big Sister Fann I had learned to identify the eunuchs’ status by the way they dressed, and it was now time to apply my knowledge. Those who held high positions wore velvet robes draped with fine jewelry and were served by apprentices. They had their own tea makers, dressers, messengers, accountants, and figurehead wives and concubines. They adopted children to carry on the family name and purchased property outside the Forbidden City. They became rich and ruled their households like emperors. When one famous eunuch found out that his wife was having an affair with a servant boy, he hacked her to pieces and fed her to his dog.
By now I was starving. The two hundred of us had been divided into groups of ten and then scattered to different corners of the garden. We sat or stood on wooden or stone platforms or large river-smooth rocks. Spread before us were man-made ponds dotted with floating lotus and rippled by rising koi. Between us were carved wood panels and stands of bamboo.
The eunuch who was responsible for my group had a bronze decoration on his hat and a quail on his chest. He reminded me of my brother Kuei Hsiang. The eunuch had a naturally rosy mouth and girlish features. He was skinny and seemed shy. He kept his distance from us, and his eyes constantly traveled between the girls and his superior, a eunuch who wore a white decoration on his hat and had an oriole on his chest.
“My name is Orchid.” Whispering, I went up to the skinny eunuch and introduced myself. “I am very thirsty, and I was wondering-”
“Shush!” He pressed his index finger to his lips nervously.
“What’s your name? How should I address you?” I continued.
“An-te-hai.”
“Well, An-te-hai, could I please have some water?”
He shook his head. “I can’t talk. Please don’t ask me questions.”
“I would stop if-”
“I am sorry.” He spun on his heels and quickly disappeared behind bamboo bushes.
How long could I stand like this? I looked around and heard the other girls’ stomachs grumbling.
The sound of water from a nearby stream made me feel thirstier. The girls were slowly becoming frozen into an ancient tableau. It was a picture composed of elegant trees, dangling vines, swaying bamboo and young maidens.
I stared at this tableau until I saw a figure moving like a snake through the bamboo.
It was An-te-hai. He returned with a cup in his hand. His steps were swift and soundless. I realized that the eunuchs were trained to walk like ghosts. An-te-hai’s soft soles touched the ground while his feet rocked like boats.
Stopping in front of me, he passed me the cup.
I smiled and bowed.
An-te-hai turned and walked away before I finished my bow.
I sensed eyes shooting at me from all directions as I raised the water to my lips. Knowing how they felt, I took a sip and then passed the cup around.
“Oh, thank you so much.” The girl who stood next to me took the cup. She was slender and had an oval face. Her double-lidded deep eyes were bright. From her accent and graceful movements, I guessed that she was from a wealthy family. Her silk dress was embroidered with the most sophisticated patterns, and diamonds hung from her head to her toes. Her headpiece was made of golden flowers. She had a long neck, and her poise seemed effortless.
The cup traveled from hand to hand until there was not a drop left. All the girls seemed to relax a little. The beautiful oval-faced girl with exotic eyes waved at me from her bench. As I approached her, she moved to one side.
“I am Nuharoo.” She smiled.
“Yehonala.” I sat down beside her.
It was in this fashion that Nuharoo and I introduced ourselves. Neither of us could then foretell that we had just made a connection that would last a lifetime. We were called by our last names in the court, indicating the clan to which we belonged. Without further explanation we understood that we were from the two most powerful clans of the Manchu race: the Yehonala and the Nuharoo. The two clans used to be rivals and had fought countless wars over the centuries. It was not until the king of the Nuharoo clan married the daughter of the king of the Yehonala clan that the two families united and eventually took over China, creating the Celestial Purity, or Ch’ing, Dynasty.
I smelled the scent of lilies from Nuharoo’s hair. She sat still and gazed at the stands of bamboo as if drawing them with her eyes. She radiated contentment. For a long time she didn’t move. It was as if she were studying the details of each leaf. Her concentration was undisturbed by the passing eunuchs. I wondered what she was thinking, if she shared my longing for my family, my anxiety about the future. I wanted to know what drove her to try for the selection. I was sure that it was neither hunger nor money. Had she dreamt of becoming an empress? How was she raised? Who were her parents? There was not the slightest nervousness in her expression. It was as if she simply
