though she was glad to have it confirmed. But it was clear Miss Darcy thought her relationship to Mr. Darcy was much closer than it in fact was. What had her brother been telling her, that Miss Darcy would approach Elizabeth so much as a family member? And had he spoken of her to his sister enough for her to have expectations, even before she came to Pemberley? Her thoughts whirled with all that Miss Darcy had let slip unknowingly.
It was then necessary to fend off the inquisitiveness of her family regarding her letter. She chose to say only that Miss Darcy was a sweet girl, and that they had agreed to correspond after meeting briefly in Derbyshire, though this explanation drew questioning glances from Mrs. Gardiner.
Elizabeth’s curiosity regarding Miss Darcy’s concerns would not rest; she resolved to write back to her that very same day, and was able to send her response with the next post. She was not overly surprised, then, to receive another letter as soon as could be expected, only a day after her father’s discouraged return from London.
Mr. Bennet took the occasion of the arrival of Georgiana’s second letter to Elizabeth to tease her about her conquest of the Darcys. “Mr. Gardiner could not say enough good about Mr. Darcy while I was in London, though I certainly do not know what he could have seen in him. He went so far as to suggest that Mr. Darcy might be partial to you, Lizzy! But I assured him that he was imagining things, given your pointed dislike of the man and his perfect indifference to you.”
Elizabeth, who was by this time tolerably well acquainted with her own feelings about Darcy, forced herself to smile. “Well, he does improve upon acquaintance. My uncle was no doubt struck by his condescension in allowing his sister to correspond with me.”—among other things, she added to herself. She blessed Mr. Gardiner’s discretion regarding the episode at the inn. She felt quite unready to discuss that with her family.
Miss Darcy’s letter contained thanks for Elizabeth’s good advice; Georgiana had, as advised, spoken with Mrs. Reynolds about finding a woman of good repute in Lambton to be her temporary companion, and was much relieved by this. She reported that Mr. Darcy remained in London, and that Miss Bingley grew daily more vexed with his absence. There were no references this time to Mr. Darcy holding Elizabeth in special regard, a fact which caused Elizabeth more distress than she cared to admit. She wrote back a cheery note—far more cheery than she felt, given the circumstances—detailing life at home with her sisters and the visits of Mr. Bingley and his obvious partiality to Jane—though Elizabeth cautioned her not to breathe a word of that to Miss Bingley.
The next day’s post brought a letter from Mr. Gardiner with the happy news that Lydia and Wickham had been found, and that preparations were underway for their wedding. The relief this brought to the household was great. The violence of Mrs. Bennet’s transports of joy was enough to make Elizabeth seek refuge in her own room, where she might think with freedom.
Although she rejoiced at Lydia’s recovery from shame, Elizabeth found herself in an unusual lowness of spirits. Hard as it had been to bear the dread of Lydia’s infamy, it was the more difficult when she thought of her last meeting with Darcy. The more she considered it, the more she saw in Lydia’s elopement and marriage a probable end to her hopes. Although Darcy clearly had not given up all affection for her, Elizabeth’s vanity was insufficient to believe that he could overcome, for a woman who had already refused him, a sentiment so natural as abhorrence against any relationship with Wickham. Brother-in-law of Wickham! Every kind of pride must revolt from the connection. Even if he could tolerate it, how could he ever expose Georgiana to the possibility of Wickham as a relation? She could see no hope. As she began now to comprehend that he was exactly the man, who, in disposition and talents, would most suit her, she mourned that it was not to be.
She was distracted briefly from these thoughts when Jane confided to her in delight that Mr. Bingley had at long last proposed to her, and she attempted to rally her spirits lest Jane notice her state of mind. She would likely have been somewhat less than successful in this endeavor, had it not been for the fact that the household was all in an uproar with preparations for this new wedding with a date set for a little over two months hence, making it rather simple to disguise her feelings.
When the next letter from Miss Darcy arrived, Elizabeth found herself reluctant to open it at all. She found that she both longed to hear of Darcy, and feared it with the same thought. Any word of attachment on his part would bring up the pain of missing him; a word of indifference would be devastating.
Elizabeth wished she could be as certain as Miss Darcy. She wondered how much of Georgiana’s enthusiasm for her brother’s esteem of her arose from wishful thinking on her part rather than from anything he might have said, and these painful thoughts led to a tearful retreat to her room, where she found comfort in holding Darcy’s handkerchief.
That night she decided to open her heart to Jane. She started by telling her about meeting Darcy at Pemberley, and their several meetings there. Jane was perhaps less surprised by parts of this than Elizabeth had anticipated, having already concluded from a variety of evidence that her sister was concealing a great deal.
“You never mentioned seeing Mr. Bingley on your journey, then, the day he first arrived back at Netherfield, you said that you had thought him still at Pemberley,” said Jane. “And you never said anything about Miss Darcy either, and then she was suddenly a regular correspondent. I still owe all my information of your acquaintance with her to another source.”
“There are parts of the story, though, that Mr. Bingley would not be able to relate to you, which will perhaps explain why I have been so reticent. But I must warn you, this will not reflect well on me, and you are likely to be shocked and disappointed.”
Jane promptly reassured her dear Lizzy that nothing could change her high opinion of her, but she did prove to be somewhat shaken when Elizabeth told her of her encounter with Darcy after receiving the news of Lydia’s elopement. However, a moment’s reflection allowed her to find a point of view which rendered near guiltless all of the people of whom she was so determined to think well. She earnestly explained to Elizabeth that clearly she had not been herself at the time, owing to the severe shock of Lydia’s behavior; Mr. Darcy, of whom it was now a matter of anxiety to think well, was perhaps distressed beyond himself by the prospect of losing Elizabeth for a second time. Her poor aunt and uncle had no doubt been overwhelmed by the simultaneous problems of their two nieces.
Elizabeth had to laugh at this picture. “Dear Jane, you cannot have us all so clear of conscience, I am afraid. That Mr. Darcy and I were both in distress I will grant you, and it might possibly excuse our initial encounter, but the second must simply be put down to bad behavior on both of our parts. And I do not believe the Gardiners were overly distressed about the outcome; they came out of the entire episode thinking so highly of Mr. Darcy that they are now his greatest advocates.”
“But Lizzy, how distressed you must have been about all of this! Whatever will you do when you see him again?”
“I believe that a wide range of options are possible. Being civil seems a possibility, though hiding or running away in a panic might be more appropriate. Or, if all else fails, I could always behave badly again.”
An earnest entreaty to be serious had the desired effect, and the next hour was spent in conversation.
