Redshirts

“It’s not that shocking,” Collins said. “We all have phones that give away our locations to the Intrepid’s computer system. I could, as your superior officer, have the computer locate you anywhere on the ship.”

“Q’eeng isn’t your underling,” Dahl said. “Neither is Captain Abernathy.”

“The alert system isn’t strictly legal,” Collins allowed.

“But you all have access to it,” Dahl said.

“They have access to it,” Cassaway said, pointing to Collins and Trin.

“We give you warning when they’re on their way,” Trin said.

“‘I’m going to get some coffee,’” Dahl said. Trin nodded.

“Yes, which only works as long as you two are actually here,” Cassaway said. “If you’re not around, we’re screwed.”

“We can’t have the entire ship on the alert system,” Trin said. “It would be too obvious.”

Cassaway snorted. “As if they’d notice,” he said.

“What does that mean?” Dahl asked.

“It means that the captain, Q’eeng and the others seem oblivious to the fact that most of the ship’s crew go out of their way to avoid them,” Mbeke said. “They’re also oblivious to the fact that they kill off a lot of the crew.”

“How can they be oblivious to that?” Dahl said. “Hasn’t someone told them? Don’t they know the stats?”

Dahl’s four lab mates shared quick glances at each other. “It was pointed out to the captain once,” Collins said. “It didn’t take.”

“What does that mean?” Dahl asked.

“It means that talking to them about the amount of crew they run through is like talking to a brick wall,” Cassaway said.

“Then tell someone else,” Dahl said. “Tell Admiral Comstock.”

“You don’t think that’s been tried?” Cassaway said. “We’ve contacted Fleet. We’ve contacted the Dub U’s Military Bureau of Investigation. We’ve even had people try to go to journalists. Nothing works.”

“There’s no actual evidence of malfeasance or command incompetence, is what we’re told,” Trin said. “Not us, specifically. But whoever complains about it.”

“How many people do you have to lose before it becomes command incompetence?” Dahl asked.

“What we’ve been told,” Collins said, “is that as the flagship of the Dub U, the Intrepid takes on a larger share of sensitive diplomatic, military and research missions than any other ship in the fleet. Because of that, there is commensurate increase of risk, and thus a statistically larger chance crew lives will be lost. It’s part of the risk of such a high-profile posting.”

“In other words, crew deaths are a feature, not a bug,” Cassaway said, dryly.

“And now you know why we just try to avoid them,” Mbeke said.

Dahl thought about this for a moment. “It still doesn’t explain the Box.”

“We don’t have any good explanation for the Box,” Collins said. “No one does. Officially speaking, the Box doesn’t exist.”

“It looks like a microwave, it dings when it’s done and it outputs complete nonsense,” Dahl said. “You have to present its results in person, and it doesn’t matter what you say when you give the data to Q’eeng, just so long as you give him something to fix. I don’t really have to point out all the ways that’s so very fucked up, do I?”

“It’s how it’s been done since before we got here,” Trin said. “It’s what we were told to do by the people who had our jobs before us. We do it because it works.”

Dahl threw up his hands. “Then why not use it for everything?” he asked. “It’d save us all a lot of time.”

“It doesn’t work with everything,” Trin said. “It only works for things that are extraordinarily difficult.”

“Like finding a so-called counter-bacterial in six hours,” Dahl said.

“That’s right,” Trin said.

Dahl looked around the room. “It doesn’t bother you that a science lab has a magic box in it?” he asked.

“Of course it bothers us!” Collins said sharply. “I hate the damn thing. But I have to believe it’s not actually magic. We just somehow got hold of a piece of technology so incredibly advanced it looks that way to us. It’s like showing a caveman your phone. He wouldn’t have the first idea how it worked, but he could still use it to make a call.”

“If the phone were like the Box, the only time it would let the caveman make a call would be if he were on fire,” Dahl said.

“It is what it is,” Collins said. “And for some reason we have to do the Kabuki dance of showing off gibberish to make it work. We do it because it does work. We don’t know what to do with the data, but the Intrepid’s computer does. And at the time, in an emergency, that’s enough. We hate it. But we don’t have any choice but to use it.”

“When I came to the Intrepid, I told Q’eeng that at the Academy we had trouble replicating some of the work you guys were doing on the ship,” Dahl said. “Now I know why. It’s because you weren’t actually doing the work.”

“Are you done, Ensign?” Collins said. She was clearly getting tired of the inquisition.

“Why didn’t you just tell me all of this when I came on board?” Dahl said.

“What are we going to say, Andy?” Collins said. “‘Hi, welcome to the Intrepid, avoid the officers because it’s likely you’ll get killed if you’re on an away team with them, and oh, by the way, here’s a magic box we use for impossible things’? That would be a lovely first impression, wouldn’t it?”

“You wouldn’t have believed us,” Cassaway said. “Not until you were here long enough to see some of this shit for yourself.”

“This is nuts,” Dahl said.

“That it is,” Collins said.

“And you have no rational explanation for it?” Dahl asked. “No hypothesis?”

“The rational explanation is what the Dub U told us,” Trin said. “The Intrepid takes on high-risk missions. More people die because of it. The crew has developed superstitions and avoidance strategies to compensate. And we use advanced technologies that we don’t understand but which allow us to complete missions.”

“But you don’t believe it,” Dahl said.

“I don’t like it,” Trin said. “I don’t have any reason not to believe it.”

“It’s saner than what Jenkins thinks,” Mbeke said.

Dahl turned to face Mbeke. “You’ve talked about him before,” he said.

“He’s doing an independent research project,” Collins said.

“On this?” Dahl asked.

“Not exactly,” Collins said. “He’s the one who built the tracking system we use for the captain and the others. The computer system AI sees it as a hack and keeps trying to patch it. So he’s got to keep updating if we want it to keep working.”

Dahl glanced over at Cassaway. “You said he looked like a yeti.”

“He does look like a yeti,” Cassaway said. “Either a yeti or Rasputin. I’ve heard him described both ways. Both are accurate.”

“I think I met him,” Dahl said. “After I went to the bridge to give Q’eeng the Box data about Kerensky’s plague. He came up to me in the corridor.”

“What did he say to you?” Collins asked.

“He told me to stay off the bridge,” Dahl said. “And he told me to ‘avoid the narrative.’ What the hell does that mean?”

Mbeke opened her mouth to speak but Collins got there first. “Jenkins is a brilliant programmer, but he’s also a bit lost in his own world, and life on the Intrepid has hit him harder than most.”

“By which she means that Jenkins’ wife got killed on an away mission,” Mbeke said.