Make Me, Sir

“Slut,” he said softly, his eyes watching her closely.

She winced, then took a breath.

“Dirty slut.”

Same reaction.

“Cunt. Fuckhole.”

She’d heard them before, could hear the nasty voice as-she pushed the memory aside. “I’m fine.”

“You’re brave, darlin’, not fine. There’s a difference.” He kissed her forehead. “So rough sex or force doesn’t bother you-only the words?”

That didn’t make sense, did it? Staring at the scars on his knuckles, she tried to think. “I… When…it… happened, other stuff had happened first”-Danny and Rock dying. The slicing pain down her face, blood everywhere, and-“and I was numb, I guess. Not feeling anything at all, but…I couldn’t shut out the voices.”

“Voices.” He rasped the word, emphasizing the s that made it plural. Under her fingers, his wrist muscles flexed to iron.

If he had directed that icy fury toward her, her heart would have stopped-instead his anger made her feel as if she wasn’t alone in an unpredictably violent world. She stroked her hand over his forearm, ruffling the golden hair.

After a few seconds, he took a long, slow breath and kissed the top of her head. “All right. Just the words. I do like knowing you wouldn’t freeze if someone attacked you”-he smiled slightly-“so long as they didn’t call you names.”

Her laugh sounded like a hiccup, but better than nothing. “I can guarantee that.” A guy had jumped her three years ago, and she hadn’t frozen at all. Apparently a man’s knees only bent one way.

“Good girl.” His brows drew together. “I do not like that a few words can paralyze you so badly. You didn’t even think about a safe word. What if you weren’t here but playing somewhere in private?”

“I…” She’d known from her date’s reaction that she’d scared him. The thought of blanking out like this terrified her. And all because of a few nasty words. “I didn’t lose it with you.”

“Little trainee, if you didn’t trust me with your body and with your emotions to some degree, you wouldn’t have returned after the first night.”

“Oh.” She’d have tried to return for Kim’s sake but might have failed if he’d truly scared her. Even now her body seemed to sing, safe, safe, safe. “Good point.”

“From your reaction to Holt, having someone else say the words is too risky.” He lifted her hand and kissed her fingers absentmindedly. “But you don’t react enough if it’s me. Of course, you knew I’d say them. Maybe I should surprise you.”

She huffed a laugh. “I don’t think the other doms would like you ruining their scenes.”

“No. But we might could find a different method.” He frowned. “Still, you should get some professional help, Gabrielle. Talking through this with someone-”

“I did have counseling afterward,” she interrupted. “This didn’t come to light then.” Or during job evals. Of course, I didn’t want to believe I had a problem. “But now… Well, if I can’t fix it myself, I’ll get help, but there’s no way I can do that at this time.” Sorry, Agent Rhodes, but I need to visit a psychologist. I’ll go back to playing decoy later. Tempting. Nonetheless, she’d stay. For Kim.

But God, what if someone-a killer-called her names? Her skin chilled. She needed to get over this now. “You said ‘a different method.’ What do you have in mind?”

He hesitated. “This might be too realistic, might raise more demons than we want to deal with right now.”

His use of we wiped away the chill. She wouldn’t have to face her fear alone. “Go on.”

“The Shadowlands has a yard for people who want to play outside. Sometimes Master Z closes it down and sets up”-she saw him reject the r word and choose another-“capture games. Submissives are given a head start and then chased by their doms. They might get punished for their escape or fucked or both.”

Marcus grabbing her. Pushing her to the ground. Holding her hair and… Heat slid through her, hot enough to liquefy her lower half. Until she imagined a man-any man-forcing her, and she chilled.

“I will be damned,” Marcus said slowly. “I wouldn’t have thought the idea would excite you, but it did. For a moment. Tell me what turned you off after that.”

The sharing came easier this time, maybe because he listened so carefully. “A stranger grabbing me and holding me down.”

His brows drew together. “What excited you?”

She looked away, a flush of embarrassment heating her face. Yeah, tell the nice dom that he turns you on.

His warm hand cupping her cheek, he forced her to look at him. “Talk to me, sugar.”

“You,” she whispered. “You grabbing me.”

“I see.” He stroked the underside of her jaw with his thumb. “Most women want to choose the man who stars in their fantasy, darlin’. Especially ones with a history like yours. But acting out a capture fantasy wasn’t what I had in mind.”

“Then what?”

“A game of hide-and-seek. And when I catch you, I’ll call you nasty names.”

“Get real.”

“I am. The gardens feel dangerous, especially with others acting out their chase games. If you are sufficiently nervous…I think it might work. For tonight, all I want is for you to say a safe word rather than freeze. That will, at least, make you safer if you’re in a BDSM scene.”

Not a rape fantasy, just a children’s game. Her mouth still felt too dry, her heart too fast. “But only you?”

His eyes held complete understanding. “Me. I am the only one who will chase you. No one else.”

She nodded, feeling like a bobblehead doll she’d won at a carnival years before. “Yes.”

Chapter Nine

Marcus tucked Gabrielle behind the bar where Cullen could keep an eye on her and went to change out of his suit.

When he returned, he stood off to one side for few minutes, amusement trickling through him. Apparently she’d recovered enough to sass Cullen; he’d gagged her with a ball gag, which not only silenced her but added the humiliation of making her drool around the rubber ball.

Cullen occasionally stopped mixing drinks to wipe her chin and-from the way her color came and went-give her hell. New submissives often misread the sociable bartender, figuring him easygoing. They rarely made the mistake twice.

Marcus strolled over, pausing to exchange greetings with the various members around the bar.

Cullen glanced at Marcus’s black jeans and sleeveless T-shirt. “Nice to see you in real clothes for a change. By the way, I found your trainee too mouthy to tolerate.”

Marcus looked at Gabrielle.

She stared at his clothing as if she’d never seen a dom in jeans.

Suppressing his amusement, he waited until her gaze rose to meet his, then looked at the gag in her mouth and let his disappointment in her behavior show.

To his surprise, her eyes reddened with tears before she turned her head away.

Something twisted inside him. The bond between them continued to develop. She not only trusted him, but she wanted-needed-to please him. So there was hope for her after all. But the connection went two ways, being