Beloved

They had cleared the harbor, and as the Sea Nymph swept into the open sea Zenobia felt a small thrill of excitement. Strangely, the sea did not frighten her, child of the desert that she was. She found it very much like the desert, vast and rolling and ever-changing. It seemed to go on forever, and in the days ahead she found that she could stand at the rail for hours, her eyes seeking, searching, ever watching, for what she knew not.

* * *

It had been early spring when they left Portus, and now they would shortly be reaching Massilia, the great and ancient port in that part of Caesar's Gaul known as Narbonensis. Here, the Alexander family would leave their ship and journey up through Gaul, using the roads traveled for centuries by the tin caravans. On the north coast of Gaul they would once again meet up with Sea Nymph and cross the channel to Britain. Because of the dangers of sea travel Marcus had preferred his family to travel by land where safe routes existed. The slaves would remain with the ship; but Zenobia and Dagian's personal servants, Mavia's nurse, and Severus would travel with the family.

At Massilia there was no undue activity about the docks, nor any interest shown in the Sea Nymph or her passengers. Marcus breathed a deep sigh of relief, though he realized that if Gaius Cicero had returned to Rome with the information that they had sailed for Cyprus, there would be a pursuit ordered in that direction. When their pursuers discovered no trace of them, the search would probably be ordered in the direction of Britain; but by then the trail would be cold, and they would be where Rome could not reach.

They left Sea Nymph, and traveled easily and quickly up from the coast bordering the Mediterranean to the coast on the channel that faced Britain.

The weather was pleasant, and they traveled amid the beauty of Gaul with its flower-filled fields and its great forests of oak. It was the forests with their soaring trees and dappled sunlight that made Zenobia nervous. She had never seen such vast expanses of trees, and she did not like being shut off from her sun. The nights they spent in the forests were most frightening to her, and she lay hollow-eyed and wide awake against Marcus, who slept unconcerned by her side. Every hoot of an owl, every unexplained rustle (and the long night seemed full of them) set her heart beating quicker. Zenobia welcomed their arrival at the coast where Sea Nymph waited to ferry them across to Britain.

They sailed from Gaul on an evening tide. By morning they would be in Britain. Zenobia dozed fitfully that night, her entire body attuned to the dawn, and when it came she rose from her place and wrapped herself in a long cloak before leaving the cabin. There was no wind, and the sky was white. Sea Nymph bobbed gently amid the clouds of fog, the only sound the rhythmic splash of the sea against the sides of the ship.

Then, as the sky began to grow a clear blue and the mists were driven away by the rising wind, she saw ahead of her a large island, its white cliffs rising out of the sea. Behind her she heard a step so familiar she didn't even bother to turn. 'What is it, Marcus?'

'It is the island of Vectis, and just beyond it is Portus Adurni, where we shall land.'

'What makes the cliffs so white?'

'They are made of chalk,' he said.

'Interesting,' she replied, then added, 'Will Vaba and his family be awaiting us in Portus Adurni?'

'No,' he said quietly.

'Are they already upon our island, or are they to come after us?'

He sighed. 'They are not coming at all, beloved.'

'Not coming?' She turned and looked up at him. 'Why are they not coming, Marcus?'

'Because Vaba chooses not to come. Cyrene is not the grandest place in the Roman world, but he prefers to remain there with Flavia and their daughter. He has found contentment.'

Quick tears sprang to her eyes. 'He is rejecting me, Marcus. He is rejecting his own mother! He has never forgiven me for Palmyra, and I doubt he ever will. My children are gone, and I am alone.'

'Your children are all alive, although they choose to live their own lives, beloved. Demi was found amid the ruins of the city, and has been nursed back to health by your brothers. He chooses to remain with the Bedawi. So the sons of Odenathus have survived despite all, and we have our daughter! The gods have taken away with one hand, it is true, but they have also given with the other.'

She cried then, weeping against his chest until her sorrow was finally purged. Then, sniffing loudly, she looked up at him. With a loving smile he kissed her on her nose, and she had to laugh softly, for it was the sort of thing a mischievous little boy would have done. 'I love you,' he said, 'and we are about to begin a new life. Put the past behind you, Zenobia. Only today and tomorrow matter.'

'Yes,' she said, 'you are right, Marcus, and yet I cannot help but be sad. They were only little boys the last time I looked, and now suddenly they are grown men and they do not need me any longer.'

'I need you,' he answered her, 'and our daughter needs you, and the son you will give me needs you!'

'I know, Marcus, but let me mourn my loss without guilt. Sometimes a woman needs time to mourn such a loss. I shall not die of grief, never fear.'

Sea Nymph sailed past Vectis, and around the island's headland into the harbor of Portus Adurni. Compared to the great harbors she had seen, this one was tiny, and yet it was a main port of entry for Roman Britain. Around them on the deck great activity was taking place as the ship's sailors prepared for landing.

'Look!' Marcus pointed. 'There is my brother, Aulus, come to meet us!'

'Your brother? How did he know we were coming?'

'Sea Nymph arrived on the Gaulish coast before we did. Before we left the ship at Massilia I had instructed Captain Paulus that he was to send a messenger ahead to Britain as soon as he reached Gaul. That is why Aulus is here.' He turned back to the rail and, grinning, shouted, 'Aulus! You are getting fat!'

'And you are graying like an old man!' came back the laughing reply.

The ropes from the ship were thrown shoreward and made fast. The gangway was lowered, and Aulus Alexander Britainus rushed aboard to embrace his brother. There were tears in his blue eyes, although, to his older brother's amusement, he quickly brushed them aside. Still, Marcus was touched. 'Praise the gods you are safe!' Aulus said. 'And our mother?'

'I have brought her to safety also,' Marcus replied.

The two broke apart and stood for a moment staring delightedly at each other. Then Aulus's eyes swung about to light upon Zenobia, and he boldly assessed her. She stared back as coolly. Finally Aulus grinned in a boyish, impudent fashion.

'Is this Zenobia?' he demanded.

Marcus chuckled. 'Yes, you overgrown roughneck, this is Zenobia, my wife. Zenobia, this is my charming but rude younger brother, Aulus.'

'Hail, brother!' Zenobia said, and then she mischievously embraced him, kissing him on both cheeks and pressing her beautiful bosom against his chest.

As her heady hyacinth scent rose up to assail him Auius felt a quick stab of desire, and he gasped in surprise. Both Marcus and Zenobia laughed. 'Whew!' chuckled the younger Alexander. 'I surrender, sister. You are more woman than I'm prepared to deal with, and I bow to my brother's ability.'

'As well you should,' Zenobia teased him, and then she turned to her husband. 'I will go and fetch Dagian. She will want to see this reprobate, I am sure.'

Aulus and Marcus both watched her go, and with a grin Aulus congratulated his older brother. 'By the gods, she is a beauty! You'll get a host of sons on her, brother.''

'Perhaps if we are fortunate, Aulus, but I will not endanger her life to insure my immortality. Zenobia and I are no longer children, though we be newly married. We already have a child, and if Mavia is all we ever have then I shall be satisfied.'

'But Zenobia's daughter is the child of her late husband. That does not count.'

'Zenobia's daughter is mine, brother.'

Aulus still did not understand, but then he saw the little girl exiting the main cabin of the ship, running toward