New York.
“Sam…”
“It's okay, josh.” She smiled gently at him and took a deep breath. “It happened in Colorado, about fifteen months ago. It was something stupid I did with a horse.” The memory was blurred now, but she would always remember the gray stallion… Gray Devil… and the endless moment when she had flown through the air. “I took a chance with a wild stallion. He was a real bitch to ride and he threw me into a ravine.”
“Why-why did you do it?” His eyes filled again as he watched her. He knew instinctively that she had pushed the horse too hard, and she didn't deny it.
“I don't know.” She sighed again. “I was crazy, I guess. I think Black Beauty made me think I could handle any stallion I ever came up against and I was upset about something.” She had been depressed about Tate, but she didn't tell him that. “So, that's what happened.”
“Will you… can they…?” He didn't know how to finish, but she easily understood him and shook her head.
“No. This is it. I thought you knew though. I figured Caroline would have told you.”
“She never did.”
“Maybe she was too wrapped up with Bill. He had just had his first heart attack around that time. I wanted to come out but I was too busy with work, and then-” She faltered but went on. “I was stuck in the hospital for ten months.” She looked around her at the familiar buildings. “I should have come back though afterwards, but I don't know… I think I was afraid to. Afraid to face what I couldn't do anymore, so I never saw her again, Josh”-her lip trembled-“and she was so damn sad after Bill died, and I never helped her.” She closed her eyes and held out her arms and she clung to the old cowboy again.
“She was all right, Sam. And she went like she wanted to. She didn't want to hang around without him.” Did he know, then? Had they all known? Had the pretense been a farce for all those years? Sam looked into his face and saw that it was no secret. “They was as good as married, Sam.”
She nodded. “I know. They should have gotten married.”
He only shrugged. “You can't change old ways.” And then he looked down at her again, his eyes filled with questions. “What about you?” He understood suddenly how unlikely it was that she'd keep the ranch now. “You going to sell this place now?”
“I don't know.” She looked troubled as they lingered on the porch. “I don't see how I could run it. I think maybe I belong in New York.”
“You live with your folks now?” He seemed interested in how she managed but she shook her head with a small smile.
“Hell no. I live alone. I live in the same building as the friends who brought me out here. I had to get a new apartment, one without steps. But I can take care of myself.”
“That's terrific, Sam.” There was only a faint hint that he was talking to a cripple, but she knew he'd still have to make the adjustment. In some ways she still did too, so she didn't hold it against him. And then what he said next shocked her. “Why couldn't you do that out here? Hell, we'd all help you. And shit, there's no reason why you can't ride. As long as you ride careful now.” He almost glared at her as he said it, and then he smiled.
“I don't know, Josh. I've been thinking about it, but it's all pretty scary. That was why I came out here. I didn't want to make the decision to sell till I came out here again to see for myself.”
“I'm glad you did. And you know”-he narrowed his eyes and stroked his chin, staring at the darkening horizon-“I think we got an old saddle in there I can fix up for you just fine. And I'll tell you one thing.” He turned back to glare at her. “You ain't riding Black Beauty, if I have to kick your ass to keep you off him!”
“Try and stop me!” She was laughing now, it was almost like the old days, but he wasn't kidding around.
“It'll be my pleasure. I'd like to know who was the fool who let you ride that other stallion.”
“Someone who saw me ride.”
“Damn show-off.” It was the kind of thing Tate would have said and her eyes grew serious again as she looked at Josh.
“Josh?”
“Yeah?”
“Did you ever hear any more about Tate Jordan?” It had been more than a year and a half since he left, but Josh just shook his head.
“Nope. Just another cowboy. Drifted off God knows where. He would have made you a good foreman though, Sam.” Not to mention a good husband, but Sam didn't say what was in her heart.
“How's the new man?”
“All right. But he's leaving. He's already had an offer. He told the lawyer that yesterday morning. He don't want to take no chances that you might sell the ranch and he might lose his job, so he's movin' on while he can. He's got a bunch of kids,” Josh said by way of explanation and Sam watched him thoughtfully.
“What about you, Josh? You staying?”
“Hell yes. This has been my home for too many years for me to go anywhere. You're going to have to sell me with the ranch.”
“Tell you what, if I don't, how would you like to be foreman?”
“You kidding, Sam?” His eyes lit up with interest. “I'd sure as hell like that, and my wife would be so full of herself she'd make us all sick. But I could live with that.” They grinned at each other and he stuck out a rough hand, which she shook.
“Sam?” Charlie peeked out the screen door then, he had heard her talking and wondered who it was. She wheeled quickly in her wheelchair, made the introductions, and they talked for a few minutes about the ranch.
And then finally Josh looked down at her again. He had forgotten her for a minute in the conversation that went on above her head. “How long you staying, Sam?”
“Just till Sunday. We have to get back. Charlie and I work together in New York. He's an artist.”
“I am not, I'm a genius.” They all grinned.
“Can you ride?” He shook his head and Josh smiled broadly. “We'll teach you. And Sam says you brought your kids.”
“Three of them. My sons.”
“How many you got in all?” Josh raised an eyebrow.
“Four. We left a baby girl at home.”
“Shit,” he guffawed, “that ain't nothin'. I got six.”
“God save me!” Charlie looked faint and they all laughed.
Josh came in then to meet Mellie and the boys, and then they all trooped out to the barn to look at the horses, and the boys were so excited that they were jumping up and down in the straw and squealing while the others laughed. Plans were made for the next day to give them lessons, and then Sam stopped for a few moments to look at Black Beauty, sedate and splendid as ever in his stall.
“He's a fine-looking horse, Sam, ain't he?” Even Josh looked him over with pride, and then he glanced at Sam as though he had just remembered something. “He's yours now, Sam.”
“No.” She shook her head slowly, looking at Josh. “He'll always be Caro's. But I'll ride him.” This time she smiled, but he didn't.
“No, you won't.”
“We can fight about that in the morning.” He looked doubtful but they wandered back to the big house, and he left them on the porch, with a last tender look at Sam. It was then that she realized that it had been a homecoming. That even if the others were gone now, she still had Josh. And she had the beautiful ranch that Caroline had left her, and the memories of what her old friend had shared with Bill, and her own memories of Tate in their cabin-none of that would ever leave her, especially if she stayed right here.
32
“Okay now, Sam… we got you…” Two cowboys made a seat for her and held her while two more held the horse firmly. It wasn't Black Beauty they held between them, and not even Navajo, but a new horse named Pretty Girl.
