“Oh my God!” Ferney’s eyes went so wide Kimber could see the whites all around the cool gray irises. “Your mystery lover was Jay? The whole time?”
“Apparently.” Kimber’s voice broke on the word. She hated to admit it, hated the pain and nausea it caused to do so, hated thinking about the truth, remembering how libertine and wanton she’d been. She’d put herself in a vulnerable position and it made her sick to think the person she’d trusted most took advantage of that.
“I’m aghast. Aghast.” Ferney sloshed the rest of the bottle of pinot noir into two glasses, pouring most of it on the breakfast nook’s table, and pushed one toward Kimber. “I can’t believe sweet, worshipful Jay would do something so manipulative and conniving. The guy’s about as devious as a Care Bear. Since when did he start being such a guy and thinking with his dick?”
“Who knows.” Kimber picked up the glass, her fingers shaking, and took a greedy gulp.
“Talk about an opportunist.”
“Mmm.” The wine was tasteless on Kimber’s tongue.
“However…” Ferney paused, drumming her manicured nails. “It sounds pretty hot, too.”
Kimber nearly choked on the wine. “What?”
“Don’t ‘what’ me. Weren’t you raving about the whole thing a week or so ago?”
“I said all that about someone who I thought wasn’t a fucking liar.” Kimber’s face flamed as the trembling moved from her fingers to the rest of her body, and she tore a hand through her bedraggled, unwashed blonde hair. “It makes me physically ill, thinking about the things I did with Jay. I put myself on the line, assuming that I could. I thought I was with someone I could trust, not someone who would take advantage of me like this. It was degrading.”
“I’m sure Jay didn’t see it that way. Degrading you was likely the last thing on his mind, considering you were fulfilling his dreams. So.” Ferney leaned forward, her eyes gleaming. “You said the sex was amazing?”
“Ferney!”
“You’re right, how dumb of me to ask. Of course it was amazing. You kept going back for more, after all.”
Kimber swallowed back a rush of nausea, her sister’s voice the equivalent of an air horn being blasted in her ear. “Please. Focus.”
“I am. I’m very focused. I’m focused on what you can’t focus on.”
Tears pricked Kimber’s eyes and she blinked them away. “All I can focus on is that I trusted Jay, and he betrayed me.”
“You also trusted who you thought was a total stranger with your heart and body. That stranger just so happened to be someone who’s worshipped you for years and would never intentionally hurt you. Considering all the different people it could’ve been, this may have actually been the best of all possible scenarios.”
“Are you seriously kidding me? This is the worst thing that could’ve happened.”
Ferney shrugged, her mouth twisting in sympathy. “Maybe so, maybe not.” She wrapped an arm around her sister’s neck, less of a hug and more like a lazy stranglehold. “I’m not saying that Jay didn’t do a disgusting, awful, unforgivable thing, but you know you guys were good together. And now you’ve had the best sex of your life with someone you really like. So disgusting, awful, unforgivable thing aside, how does that make you feel?”
“I don’t know.” Kimber’s gaze dropped to the table as she scratched at a dried patch of sauce clinging to the surface. “I haven’t thought about it.”
“Then think about it.”
Kimber froze and gaped at her sister. “Are you suggesting I forgive him?”
“No, just suggesting you think about it, that’s all. Hole yourself up tonight and do some serious soul-searching about the whole thing.”
“I can’t.” Kimber crossed her arms over her chest. “I’m meeting up with Dane.”
“Dane?” Ferney recoiled in horror. “Gross! Why?”
“Why not?” Her sister’s vehement opposition to the idea only inspired Kimber’s innate urge to defend it.
“Because you’re all wrong for each other, and by now you can surely see that, especially with Jay in the picture.”
“Jay is not in the picture.”
Ferney snorted. “I always knew you were delusional, but not this bad.”
Before Kimber could reply, her phone chirped in her bag, and she fished it out and checked the screen. “It’s Dane.”
“Ugh.” Ferney sat back in her seat and polished off her wine with a theatrical head toss. “The madness begins. Again.”
Kimber flipped her sister the bird as she retreated into the bedroom that used to be hers, where she would fall asleep waiting in vain for Dane to call her. Now that he finally had, she couldn’t help but see it as an annoyance. “Hello?”
“Hi.” His voice held that innocent note it always did right before he intended to disappoint her. “Just wanted to see what’s up.”
Part of her wanted to scream and demand why he couldn’t have bothered to find out what was up when they were still together, but she didn’t have the energy. She sank onto the edge of the guest bed Ferney and Paul had wasted no time purchasing after she’d moved out. “Not a lot. You?”
“The same, the same.”
A long pause followed, one Kimber didn’t feel inspired to break. Had Dane always been so boring? What an irritating waste of time this conversation was turning out to be.
He cleared his throat. “Actually, I’m also calling because I have some bad news.”
No kidding. There it was-that familiar instinctual bristle as she braced herself to be pissed off at him. Apparently some things never changed. “What?”
“Alex just reminded me Aural Stimulation is playing tonight at Bellringer’s, which means I won’t be able to meet you for a drink.”
Kimber didn’t reply, trying to decide if she was surprised. Was she even upset?
The worried, vaguely desperate note that crept into his voice, however, pleased her as he added, “Can we please reschedule? Or maybe you could come to the show. Then we can talk between sets.”
She sighed, more out of boredom than anything. “I’ll let you know.”
“Please, please, please don’t be mad at me, bables.” His whimper made her shudder, and had that nickname really once warmed her heart? “Please. I really want to be better for you, for
Be better for her? Mess up what they have? What did he think was happening here? The idea that he had the impression she wanted to get back together with him sickened her, but wanting only for the conversation to end, she didn’t bother attempting to set the record straight. “I’m not mad, I just can’t talk right now. I’ll call you later.”
She hung up, wondering if she would, in fact, call him later. It was surprising to compare her feelings a few weeks ago to them now. She’d never imagined there would ever come a time where she’d be so ambivalent toward Dane. She didn’t think that would ever happen unless someone else-someone better-came along. Now it turned out that even the good guys were creeps. Sometimes a girl just couldn’t win.
Kimber returned to her apartment complex to find Taryn stretching outside their building in a black Spandex number that clung to her skin-and-bones frame. Her neighbor waved in greeting, despite that Kimber stood five feet in front of her. “Hey, Kimber. I’m just warming up for the gym. Wanna join me?”
Warming up? Taryn was already so slick with sweat she looked like she’d just dove into a pool. “No, thanks. I’m pretty beat, I didn’t get much sleep last night.” That was an understatement, and Kimber realized it was also probably no excuse to energetic Taryn, who likely sprung out of bed at 4 a.m. and set to work, cooking crack on a spoon while jumping ol’ Brad of the talented tongue. “Besides, working out always makes me feel justified for eating two giant bags of M &Ms, so it’s all futile, anyway.”
Taryn laughed. “Yeah, I hear you.” She spread her legs into a wide, upside-down V and bent forward, hinging at the hips and staring at Kimber between her spread thighs. “Hey, question for you. That guy who helped you move in-what’s his story?”
