Apollyon

“Don’t—”

Clasping the sides of his face, I kissed him. Long. Deep. Hard. When I pulled back, his eyes were pools of silver. “Just say you’re welcome. It isn’t hard. Say it.”

For the longest moment, Aiden said nothing and then, “You’re welcome.”

My lips split into a wide smile. “That wasn’t hard, was it?”

Aiden’s gaze drifted over my face and then lower. He sucked in a sharp breath. “You’re hurt.”

“It’s nothing.” I dodged the hand that reached for my shoulder. The burn had already dulled. “I’m fine. It’s just doggy slobber. Don’t come too close; I smell like wet hellhound. I’m really—”

“Lexie.”

The name—the sound of the voice—wasn’t Aiden’s, but I recognized it in my heart and soul. It couldn’t be, but it was. My breath stalled in my lungs. My legs felt suddenly weak as I turned from a shell-shocked Aiden. My heart—my heart already knew the source of that wonderful, soft, and beautiful voice.

I stumbled back a step, suddenly swamped in emotion that tightened my chest and stole my breath. Confusion followed as I shook my head in a daze. Tears sprung to my eyes. My chest cracked wide open, because this couldn’t be real.

“Mom?” 

CHAPTER 20

She didn’t look like I remembered.

When I’d seen her last—when I’d killed her—she had been a daimon, with black holes where her eyes should’ve been and a mouth full of razor-sharp teeth, set in skin so pale and translucent that inky veins had shown through.

That image had tarnished my memory of her. Something I’d been too ashamed to really delve into. The fact I couldn’t recall how beautiful she’d been horrified me, but she…

She was beautiful now.

Dark brown hair fell past her shoulders, framing her oval face. Her skin was slightly darker than mine, more olive in nature. She looked like me, but better—more refined and beautiful—and her eyes were a bright, emerald-gem color. Even in the darkness, I could see them, was drawn to the warmth in them.

I staggered a step forward, pulling free of Aiden’s grasp. “Mom?”

“Baby,” she said, and a little of my world shattered in response to her voice. “You shouldn’t be here. You can’t be here.”

I didn’t care about “here” or whatever. All that mattered was that it was my mom, and I needed her—needed to feel one of her hugs, because they made everything so much better and I’d been needing one for so, so long.

I stumbled up the incline, dropping the sickle in the prickly weeds. “Mom. Mommy…”

“Alex,” Aiden called out, his voice pained, and I couldn’t understand why.

He should’ve been happy for me. To get to see my mom again was something I’d secretly hoped would occur while we were in the Underworld, so to see her so soon, before we’d even made it through the gates, was so…

Then I remembered Apollo’s warning. There would be spirits, but my mom? I drew up short, standing a few feet from her. That… that was too cruel, even for the gods.

She cocked her head to the side, a small and very sad smile forming on her lips. “You shouldn’t be here. Turn away before it’s too late.”

I blinked, unable to move. Was it really her? Or was it some kind of ploy? Heart racing, I opened my suddenly dry mouth, but then her form flickered, much like Caleb’s had in the cell. She was a shade—so there’d be no hugs—but was it her?

Aiden came up the hill behind me, stopping short of standing by my side. “Alex, it’s…”

“Don’t say it.” I shook my head, because I couldn’t deal with this right now. I tried and was failing to see this objectively. “Please don’t.”

My mom’s form flickered again. “You must turn away. Leave this place before it’s too late. You can’t go there. You’ll never come back.”

My throat worked to let a sob loose. Lowering my chin, I squeezed my eyes shut. It was her, but it… it wasn’t. Deja vu, I thought bitterly. I could almost see it—Mom and me standing there, me holding the gun pointed directly at her, my arm trembling, unable to do what needed to be done.

And we could’ve died right then or over the course of the time in Gatlinburg. Caleb could’ve died then, instead of months later, within the false safety of the Covenant. I had failed then and was on the verge of failing again. And this time, would it be Aiden who died because of my inability to see past what was the truth?

This wasn’t my mom. This was just an it—a ward to keep us from reaching the gates. Chest constricting, I lifted my damp lashes.

“You’re not my mom,” I said, voice hoarse.

Her delicate brows furrowed and she shook her head a little. “Baby, don’t do this. Whatever reason why you think you have to do this, you don’t. Turn away, before you lose everything.”

It sort of felt like I’d already lost everything.

Aiden placed his hand on my back and I drew strength from the simple gesture. I sucked in a deep breath and let it slowly. “This isn’t going to work. You’re not my mom. So… I don’t know. Go do whatever you’re supposed to do.”

An exasperated sigh, so much like my mom, came from her. For a moment, I doubted myself. Maybe this was her and I was making a terrible ass out of myself. But then she changed.

Face fish-pale, veins slithered under her papery skin like baby snakes. Her eyes were sunken, black pits, and when her mouth opened, razor-sharp teeth filled them. “Is this better?” she asked in that sweet voice of hers.

“Gods,” I whispered, horrified. “That’s so wrong.”

Her lips formed a twisted smile. “You’re going to have to go through me, and baby, we know you don’t have it in you to do it again.”

My stomach sank with understanding. “Crap…”

Aiden moved to stand in front of me. I saw him raise the dagger and I knew that he was going to do this— take care of this for me. As much as I appreciated that and really wanted him to do it, I couldn’t.

I placed my hand on his arm, stilling him. “I… I have this.”

My mother’s cold laugh was like a Shockwave.

“Are you sure?” Aiden asked.

The grim set to his jaw told me he didn’t want to listen, but when I nodded, he stepped back and handed me the sickle blade I had dropped. I felt cold as my fingers wrapped around the handle. I hated the fine tremble in my arm and the heavy weight of the weapon.

Most of all, I hated what I had to do.

Mom watched me curiously. “Aw, baby, you really want to do this?” She took a step straight through the rubble, stopping in front of me. She laughed again. “Kill your mother twice? Wait. It’s actually three times.”

“Shut up,” Aiden growled.

But this thing—whatever it was—was on a roll. “She died—at least in all ways that mattered—in Miami. And that was to keep you safe. So, that was also your fault. Three’s a charm, eh? And you think you can do it? So what? Doesn’t mean anything. You haven’t seen anything yet.”

The back of my throat burned as I took a wobbly step forward, lifting my arm.

“You bring nothing but death to those around you,” she continued. “You should’ve never been born, because you will kill the ones you love, one way or another.”

Those words dug in deep, shattering in the depths of my heart. Without saying a word, because I knew it