soon. At least Noah and Liam knew Max and Seth already.
But on the other hand . . . If she was truly going to entertain having a relationship with Noah and Liam, the Colter family was going to be something they would have to get used to, because the Colters were too important to Lauren.
They were her family.
“Sit and keep me company,” Holly said, steering her toward the L-shaped bar that curved from the kitchen counters.
Lauren slid onto one of the leather stools and propped her elbows on the counter.
“So what are you cooking today?” Lauren asked.
Holly grinned, her eyes twinkling mischievously. “I’m totally cheating. Lily brought me three pans of lasagna yesterday, premade. All I have to do is pop them in the oven and voila, a mouthwatering Italian dinner. I have bakery rolls from town and bag salad from the store.”
Lauren laughed. “I won’t breathe a word.”
Holly took the lasagna from the fridge and slid them into the double-wall oven, set the timer and then came back to the bar and peered across it at Lauren.
“So tell me about Noah and Liam. I sense there’s more to this whole thing than their being some random strangers Max hired to protect you.”
Heat crept into Lauren’s cheeks and she fidgeted nervously on the stool.
“Why do you say that?” Lauren asked curiously.
Holly smiled. “Baby, the way those men look at you tells its own story. And the way Liam talked about people going through him and Noah to get to you? If you were just a job, they would have had some polished spiel they regurgitated for every client. There was passion in his voice and I absolutely believed him when he said he wouldn’t let anyone hurt you.”
Lauren sighed. “I wanted to talk to you about them.” She dug her fingertips into her temples and rubbed.
Holly’s look turned to one of concern. “What is it, Lauren? You know you can talk to me about anything.”
“They want a relationship with me. Like the one you have with your . . . husbands.”
Holly’s eyes widened a bit and then her brow furrowed. “Isn’t it a bit soon? Didn’t they just arrive?” Then she broke into a wry smile. “Like I can talk. Adam, Ethan and Ryan took one look at me and decided I was the one. They never looked back. It was the same when Seth first laid eyes on Lily. People laugh at the idea of love at first sight, but I’ve certainly witnessed it firsthand. Over thirty years later, here I am, still just as much in love with those old fools as I was as a starry-eyed naive girl in my twenties.”
“I love hearing about you and the dads,” Lauren said wistfully.
Holly leaned across the bar and took Lauren’s hands in hers. “Back to Noah and Liam. You’ve talked about this? Already I mean?”
Lauren shook her head. “Yes, we’ve talked, but it’s not like I just met them. Max hired them when I was still in New York City. Before he and Callie came to bring me here. They started out a giant pain in my butt.”
Holly laughed. “Sounds like a typical start to a relationship to me.”
“According to them, the attraction was there from the beginning.”
“And what about you?” Holly asked softly.
“I noticed them,” Lauren hedged.
Holly laughed again. “Kind of hard not to notice those two. They tend to stand out in a crowd. I figure Dillon’s going to get along with them just fine. They’ll be comparing tattoos and earrings. I swear I don’t know where that child of mine got his tastes.”
“How hard is it, really?” Lauren asked in a quiet voice. “I’m scared of messing up. I’m drawn to both of them. I love the idea of having these two wonderful men both devoted to me. But I’m using your husbands and Lily’s husbands as measuring sticks. I don’t want to go in with unrealistic expectations. Am I crazy for wanting this? To agreeing to try it with them?”
“Oh, sweetie, you’re overthinking this. There’s really one question to ask. Do you love them?”
Lauren dropped her gaze. “I don’t know. It’s so soon after Joel. What if I’m just latching on to the first opportunity after a really bad relationship? I don’t want to use them.”
“Okay, let me rephrase the question. Could you see yourself eventually falling in love with them?”
“Oh yes,” Lauren breathed.
Holly squeezed her hands. “Do they love you?”
“I think they could. Maybe they do. I’m not sure. But they act like I’m the most important person in the world to them. They’re so loving and patient and gentle. They aren’t trying to rush me.”
“Then that’s all that’s important. If you can see yourself falling in love with both men and they both care about you, everything else will work itself out.”
“You make it sound so easy,” Lauren said. “I just keep thinking of everything that can go wrong. What if one of them gets jealous? What if I don’t spend exactly the same amount of time with both of them?” Her face went beet red with heat. “What if I have sex more with one than the other? It all makes my head hurt.”
Holly walked around the bar and slid onto the stool next to Lauren.
“You’re taking far too much on your shoulders, baby. Listen to me. You can only control what you do. You can’t be responsible for how they react or what they do. In a lot of ways, the relationship is much harder on the men than it is the woman, and in some aspects it’s more difficult for the woman.”
“You’re confusing me,” Lauren said in amusement.
“The men have to form a bond. I know it sounds silly. In my case, the men were brothers. Trust was already there. Trust is very important between the men so they’re working on the same page. When you have a case like with Noah and Liam, that friendship and trust has to be there so that jealousy doesn’t become an issue or they’re not always wondering if the other is trying to get you to agree to kick one out of the relationship.”
“That makes sense,” Lauren agreed.
“And the way it’s more difficult for a woman, is that she has multiple personalities to learn and work around. The men are working with one woman. She’s their focus. But the woman’s focus is split between two, or in my case, three men. She has to know what makes each of them tick. And sometimes it’s a delicate balance juggling those different personalities because each man has his own set of desires, and what he wants from the relationship. One might need one thing from you while the other needs something entirely different. It can be exhausting, especially in the beginning when you’re learning.”
Lauren nodded again. “I knew I could count on you to make perfect sense, Mama C. But you know, it’s kind of exciting when everything is all shiny and new and when the mere thought of a relationship makes you breathless. They give me . . . hope. I’m almost afraid to believe, because I don’t know what I’ll do if it doesn’t work out.”
Holly cupped Lauren’s face in her hands. “Just take it one day at a time, baby. It’s all you can do. But let me tell you. Those two men are the luckiest guys on earth to have you and they don’t need to forget it. You are a beautiful, intelligent, loving young woman and one I’m very proud to call my daughter. And you are, you know. You may not bear the Colter last name, but that’s the only thing that sets you apart from one of my own.”
“Hey, Mom!”
Lauren whirled around to see Callie burst into the kitchen, a sunny smile on her face.
Holly’s expression softened, and she hopped off the stool to go hug her youngest child. Except that according to Holly, Lauren was one of her brood, which actually made Lauren the youngest.
It did heart-stopping things to Lauren to fully comprehend that she had a place in this wonderful family. God, it made her want to tear all up, and if that wasn’t just stupid after so many months, she didn’t know what it was.
As Callie was hugging her mom, Lily Colter walked in behind them. Seven months pregnant, Lily still moved gracefully despite the bulge on her small frame. She was a petite woman with delicate features.
As Lauren glanced around at the women gathered in the Colter kitchen, she realized that this was a room full of women who’d survived unimaginable tragedies, dangerous situations and heartbreak. It was one thing they all had in common.
Lily had been married before she’d met Holly’s sons, and she’d suffered a terrible loss when her newborn
