Precious Consequences

I’m in no position to argue, because I too believe Cameron

could’ve

handled it differently, but I’ve since let it slide on the premise that I don’t have time to wallow in self-pity. Sadly, it has given root to another concern;

will every man I try to date react that way when I tell him I have a daughter?

Brushing the unwelcome thought away quickly, I meet Hannah’s gentle gaze. “It’s nothing Hannah,” I lie. It’s not nothing, but I need it to be. “I wasn’t as forthcoming as I should’ve been, and now that it’s over, Cameron is free to date someone who doesn’t have the kind of responsibility I do. I’m fine being alone.”

Her eyes stay fixed on me, probing me, dissecting the lie that has fallen from my mouth so easily. She doesn’t believe me, but I need to believe me. Thankfully our conversation is halted when my grandmother and Taylor, with Macy attached to her hip, come barreling into the room with food. My stomach growls from not having eaten enough over this past week. The hospital cafeteria food is less than appetizing but I’m too hungry to protest. We all sit around Ari’s bed, me next to her, and chat with a renewed sense of exuberance. The worry and fear that has plagued me, kept me from sleeping and eating, has finally left.

Looking at the two other women here with me, I start to count my blessings, knowing that the little one next to me is my greatest blessing of all. And no man, not even Cameron Argent, can make me feel ashamed of having her.

* * *

It’s the next morning and Dr. Gates is checking Ari one last time before he signs her discharge papers. I’m happy that I can finally take her home, even if I’m a little nervous about looking after her and keeping her at home for the next two weeks. Dr. Gates gives us the all clear, asking me to bring Ari back again in three weeks for a check up and then giving me all the post-care information I’ll need. He’s advised me to keep Ari at home, where my grandmother and I can keep an eye on her, and keep her moving as little as possible for the first week. When we get home, I feed Ari and give her some medicine before tucking her in for an afternoon nap. I have a few things I need to sort out with one of my professors, so when Ari has finally fallen asleep, I take a quick drive to campus. Being Friday, it’s fairly empty, and I’m lucky to catch my Sports Reporting professor just as she’s leaving the lecture hall.

  “Professor De Jong,” I call out to her, rushing to catch up to her. “I’m so sorry to bother you. My name is Hayley Tanner. I believe my friend Hannah spoke to you earlier this week?”

The elderly lady smiles warmly at me, “Yes dear, she did. I hope your little girl is doing better.”

Her kindness and sincerity catches me slightly off-guard but I recover quickly. “She is, thank you ma’am.”

Professor De Jong motions for us to walk and as I fall into step with her I continue, “I’d like to know what my extra credit assignment is, and when it’ll need to be completed.”

“Well Miss. Tanner, I’ve put together an assignment for you entailing sports teams. Basically I want you to do an article, using as much visual photography as you can, on the inner workings of a team. I want you to attend a sports team practice, photograph them, and then put together an expose. Do you think you can have that done a week from today?”

“Yes ma’am” I reply quickly. “And thank you. I appreciate the opportunity to make up the extra grade.”

“You’re welcome Miss. Tanner. I took the liberty of finding out the practice times for the sports teams best suited to the assignment and made you a list,” she adds, handing me a sheet of paper. “Good luck.”

With that we part ways and I look down at the sheet, immediately looking for a time to do this assignment that will allow me to come in as early as possible and get it out of the way. My stomach drops when I find the only team who has a practice at six thirty a.m. on a Tuesday morning.

The swim team.

And that only means one thing.

I have to see Cameron.

Chapter 10

~ Hayley ~

The swimming pool area is quiet when I walk in. I’m fifteen minutes early, so I put my bag down on the stands and take out my camera.

“Hayley? What are you doing here?”

The rich voice I’ve come to recognize travels over me like honey, surprising me. I spin around, nearly losing my balance and find Cameron standing there. He’s wearing those Jammer things that swimmers love and nothing else. His chest is bare and I struggle to tear my gaze away from the beautiful ink. His swimming cap and goggles hang from his fingers.  I force my head up and our eyes crash. He looks genuinely surprised to see me, not that I had any reason to let him know I would be here in the first place. I’d spent most of my weekend dreading this, mulling over what it would be like to see him after our last interaction. It never ended well. I always wound up fantasizing about him and what it would feel like if he grabbed me and pressed my up against the wall.

I shake my head, feeling my cheeks warm up, and look away. I continue getting my camera ready as I reply, “I’m here for an extra credit assignment. I made the arrangements with Coach Andrews yesterday and he said I could take some pictures and talk to some of the team members this morning during practice.”

I feel Cameron’s eyes burning the back of my head but not once do I give in and look at him. I’m scared of what I’ll see f I do. Instead, I spend more time than necessary messing around with the sports settings on my camera.

“Listen, Hayley, now that you’re here, I need to apologize,” he says. His voice is soft, and gentle and I hate it. I hate that when I needed it to be comforting it wasn’t, and instead of giving me kind, understanding words, he told me I was a waste of time. This time I look at him, hoping with all my might that he sees’s the resolve in my eyes.

“Don’t worry about it, I’ve already forgotten about it.”

His eyes sadden. Good. He’d better be feeling what I felt when he walked away from me.

“You look tired,” he remarks. “And skinnier.”

“Yeah, it happens when you spend a week in the hospital without eating much,” I bite back.

“You spent a week in the hospital?” he asks. My fists clench and I have to resist my desire to slap the look of sympathy and concern right off his beautiful face. I don’t need him to care anymore. It’s too late for him to care.

“Yes, my daughter needed me.”

Cameron looks away, rubbing the back of his neck. “Is she alright?” he asks quietly. “Your daughter.”

My anger flares and I struggle to reign in the warring emotions being here with him has evoked.

“Don’t do that, Cam,” I state firmly. “Just don’t.”

I start walking away from him, although I have no clue where I’m going. I just need to get away from him and the pull I feel when we’re in the same room. His hand curls around my bicep and his fingers press into my skin as he pulls me around to face him.

“Don’t do what, Hayley?” he asks. His eyes bore into mine and it makes me uncomfortable.

“Don’t pretend you care just for my benefit. I know our friendship was just an act to get me into your bed, so there’s no need to act like it was more than that.”

Cameron’s hand tightens and he glowers at me. He takes a step closer, leaning into me and lowering his face until our noses are almost touching. I do the stupid thing and breathe him in, his sexy, masculine scent mixing with the smell of chlorine. He’s too close and he smells too good. It’s nearly too much.

“You think I’m pretending?” he grinds through his teeth.

“Aren’t you?” I throw back.

Silence.

Cameron’s gaze remains hard and it’s a full minute before he responds. “Maybe it started that way,” he concedes. “But it changed. I started to care about you more than I wanted to.”