How to Date a Dragon

Damn it. I’m going to talk to the one person who has never deserted me. The smartest, most loyal friend I have… me.

She rifled through her purse and grabbed the little notebook she carried just in case ideas struck while she was on a subway or shopping or anywhere away from her computer. It came with a little pencil she liked because she could erase the stupid words and leave only the good ones when she eventually made it home.

She wrote, Dear damn diary…

“Heh-heh. Good start. Give yourself hell, Bliss. If anyone can take it, you can.”

What was I thinking? Maybe my mother was right. “No, no. Scratch that.”

She flipped the pencil over and scrubbed the ridiculous words off the paper.

A dragon? Seriously? A dragon. I think I’ve finally met a guy who might be worth a shot, and he turns out to be some kind of circus freak.

I’d never have believed him if I hadn’t seen it with my own eyes. Transform? Yeah, right… Then he did it! Ack!

I keep waiting to wake up and find out this is just a crazy nightmare. Nope. I’ve pinched myself and then slapped myself for pinching myself. Still not popping out of any coma.

I’ve even wondered if I was drugged. Drake never slipped me any pills. He didn’t even bring me a beer. Nope. Nothing went into my mouth except, well… him. Heh-heh.

Hey, I wonder if dragon penis can cause hallucinations? Naw. That doesn’t make sense. Because if it does, that means he’s a dragon and I didn’t hallucinate anything but the truth.

“Oh my God.” Bliss slapped the side of her head and stared at the words she had just written. She sighed and mumbled her own reassurance. “It’s okay… no one is going to read this. Just go ahead and let out all the crazy.”

And while we’re at it, no wonder he said he can’t get me pregnant. We’re not even the same species! Oh, man. If we ever got married, my mother would be in seventh heaven until she learned that little fun fact. Then she’d descend to the seventh circle of hell and never be seen again.

Why do I care what my mother thinks? Haven’t I always known she means well, but…

Yeah, there are no words following that “but.” Never have been. Never will be. Some things are better left alone.

So, back to Drake. What am I supposed to do with this information? He seemed relieved after he told me, but now I’m the one who’s all jiggy. I don’t know how I’ll feel next time I look at him… if there is a next time. Didn’t he say that biker chick was probably setting the fires and he had to stop her?

I may not have known him long, but one thing I’m certain of—he won’t hit a girl. I doubt he’d even fight back unless his life depended on it, and it well might. She must be some kind of psycho to beat him up and then set fires all over the place. All because he brought me flowers? I swear, if he lives through this, I’ll ask him never to bring me flowers again.

Bliss set down the paper and pencil. She rose and paced as the gravity of the situation sank in. She’d always coped with unsavory situations using her signature flippancy and irreverence. She wasn’t feeling very flippant at the moment.

Chapter 12

Drake had greeted the other paranormals at the bar and gathered them together in the back booth. Kurt, the wizard; Tory, the shapeshifting coyote; and Nick, the werewolf. As they were waiting for Anthony, the vampire bar owner, to join them, Drake asked, “So, are there others we should invite to this meeting?”

Kurt, Tory, and Nick all exchanged glances.

At last Nick said, “No, why? Have you heard about more?”

“Yeah. Sadie said something about the building being protected even after everyone leaves for the night.”

Nick chuckled. “I guess she’s talking about the house brownies. I don’t know how much protection they’d provide. They’re about a foot tall.”

All three of the other men stared at Nick. “House brownies?” they repeated in unison.

“Yeah. They were the first paranormals Brandee had ever seen. I’m glad my wife was introduced to the supernatural world though them. They don’t present much of a threat. They’re only goal is to clean the bar, and they’re happy to do so as long as there are plenty of peanuts and pretzels to eat. If someone insults them, they might play some kind of harmless prank but that’s about it.”

Drake’s irritation rose. “Then why did Sadie think they’d provide plenty of protection for Bliss after dark?”

“Maybe because they’re down here in the bar after hours and could signal an early warning,” Nick said. “From what I understand, they eat a few snacks, then they clean the place until dawn as a thank-you.”

“Actually…” a deep voice said.

Drake whipped around to see Anthony standing behind him.

“They’re quite protective of the place. As long as they feel valued, they will continue to keep everything in perfect condition. I can’t tell you how many times Ruxandra has had a fit and trashed the bar. The brownies always put it back together before morning.”

Anthony dragged a chair over and sat at the end of the booth.

“Where is Ruxandra these days?” Tory asked.

Anthony chuckled. “She thinks she’s punishing me by depriving me of her presence.”

“Wow.” Nick leaned back, looking impressed. “Well done. What did you do to make her think that? Did you say, ‘I can’t miss you if you won’t go away?’”

The others laughed, but Anthony shook his head.

“No. She’s vain enough to have come up with that all on her own. In fact, she’s probably on another recruiting mission, finding just the right guy to make me jealous.”

Tory grinned. “Hey, maybe she’ll find someone she likes better and finally dump your ass.”

“I’d never get that lucky.” Anthony sighed. “I made her, so she’ll always feel… obligated to me. Never mind her. What did you call us together for, Drake? I assume it’s not to talk about my vampire ex-girlfriend.”

“No. I want to talk about my very human, very special girlfriend. I need your help to make sure she’s safe.”

Nick immediately went into his private investigator mode. “Why? What’s going on?”

“The female who kicked the crap out of me last week… she’s a dragon and I think she’s kind of like Anthony’s Ruxandra. She’s hard to get rid of and jealous of any woman she perceives as getting in her way.”

All four guys groaned.

Drake continued while he had the floor. “She hasn’t left the area. I think she’s been setting all the fires, but I have no proof. No one can find any signs of arson, but that just makes it even more likely that it’s her. Unlike myself, she can still breathe fire, so she could easily touch off a wooden building or a pile of brush and leave no evidence behind. Also, I think she’s targeting me since most of the fires have been set all over my district. And she may be using her wings. That puts us all at risk for discovery.”

“Wait,” Anthony said. “You work in this district, don’t you?”

“Yeah. So far she’s stayed away from this particular street, but I have a terrible feeling she’s saving it for last.”

“Crap,” Nick said. “Do you know where she’s staying? Maybe we can set up a sting.”

“No. I haven’t seen her, but I’m sure she’s around. I have this sixth sense that tingles whenever danger is near. It’s been driving me crazy—especially when we’re out on a job. If she’s watching, she’s very good at staying out of sight.”

“So, how can we help Bliss?” Tory asked.

“Look, I know this is going to sound like I broke the most important paranormal rule of all, but I had