How to Date a Dragon

I thought she understood my stern warning. After that, I decided to take a nice walk on the beach and she zipped past me, singing, “Neener, neener, neener.”

“Don’t let her get to you.”

“Oh, sure. Be the bigger goddess, right? Ignore her, right?”

“Exactly.”

“I can’t!” Mother Nature shouted so loudly the gods jumped and dropped their cards. “She’s coming into her fertile cycle. If she mates with another dragon, I’ll have to deal with more of them.” Mother Nature crossed her arms and muttered under her breath, “I was almost rid of them too.”

“Why do you want to get rid of them?”

“I don’t make mistakes, but sometimes… Never mind.”

“So, what should we do?”

“We shouldn’t do anything, yet. There are barely any dragons left, so chances of her finding one are slim. But just in case, contact the Balogs and ask them to keep an eye on that bar where the paranormals hang out. If she shows up there, we’ll need to know right away.”

Chapter 2

Bliss sat at the family dining table, trying to concentrate on her work despite constant interruptions. For some reason, her mother could not understand that talking while Bliss was trying to think was the same as interrupting.

“Is it so terrible to be back home? You’ve done nothing but mope for days.”

Her mother stirred the pasta sauce bubbling on the stove. The tangy tomatoes mixed with garlic and spices smelled like home. Under other circumstances, it would be wonderful. If Bliss were in her own apartment, she would have simply opened a jar. Try to be nice.

“I’m sorry, Ma. It’s not bad. It’s just…”

“Just what?”

Bliss sighed. “I don’t know. I feel like a nine-year-old when I’m back home, letting you cook for me, sleeping in my old bedroom.”

Her mother wiped her hands on her apron. “If you were married, I’d let you have the guest room.”

“And give up the opportunity to sleep in a bunk bed again?” Bliss slapped a hand over her heart in a dramatic gesture. “Perish the thought.”

“Yeah, yeah, Miss Sarcastic. Look, we don’t know how long you’ll be here. It could be months or years, and what if your married brothers and their lovely wives come to visit?”

Bliss tried not to groan out loud. “Why would they stay over? They live less than a mile away.”

“You never know. Besides, your sister and her husband could decide to visit from India at any time. I’m sure it wouldn’t be a short stay. The thing is, you should be married and in your own home by now. If you were married, you could forget about that silly competition. I’m sure your husband would support you no matter what happened in life. It’s good to have someone you can count on, and Daddy and I won’t be here forever. The older you get, the more I worry. I was married by the time I was twenty.”

“You were pregnant with Ricky.”

“No I wasn’t. Your brother was born early. And for your information, your father and I had been engaged for two years, so we were ready to settle down. We just waited until he graduated from the tech. You’re nearly twenty-eight! What are you waiting for?”

It was the same old argument. Bliss didn’t know why they continued with the charade. Her brother would have had to be about four months early to make the timeline work. She usually let it go, but maybe if she pursued it, her mother would be the one to shut up and let her get back to work.

“Why did Nonna and Nonno rush the wedding plans?”

“There was no rush. I just wanted a June wedding. If you want to talk about a rush, your grandmother was married at the age of eighteen after a two-week engagement.”

“And look how well that worked out. The two of them bickered each other into early graves.”

Her mother crossed herself and faced Bliss head-on. “That’s just how they communicated. They loved each other dearly. Why do you think they had six children?”

Bliss smirked. “I don’t know… lack of birth control?”

Her mother tossed her hands in the air. “You have an answer for everything. Always did.”

“Speaking of which, I should get back to work. I need to put into words all the things people are too afraid to say.”

“That business of yours is what scares the men away. Honestly, the vicious things you write in those cards… it’s dreadful. And now, because of that stupid TV show, everyone will know about it.”

“Hopefully. My cards are funny and people love them. If I get the kind of exposure I think we’re going to get, I should sell tons.”

“I’ll never understand that. If anyone gave me one of your cards, I’d be very upset.”

You don’t know how close you’ve come to getting one. Her mother would also never know how many snarky cards she’d inspired. There was just too much rich material to ignore. “I really do need to get working.”

As Bliss strolled toward the adjoining dining room, her mother said, “Why don’t you work at the desk in your room? It was always where you did your homework.”

“Because I like my legs at a ninety-degree angle and under the surface I’m working on. If I sat at my old desk, my butt would be below my knees and they’d bump up against the side of the desk. Why are you keeping that old thing anyway?”

“You never know… Maybe I’ll have a grandchild someday after all.”

“Emilio and Ricky are married. Why don’t you bug them about having kids?”

“Who says I haven’t?”

Bliss chuckled. “I love my brothers, but thank God it’s not just me.”

Her mother crossed her arms. “Aren’t you worried about your biological clock?”

Hell no. The alarm isn’t going off and won’t for years. “Ma, I don’t want to marry the wrong man just to have kids.”

“Has it never occurred to you that you might marry the right man? Honestly, you’re such a pessimist.”

“I am not. I just have a pessimistic life.”

“Oh, really? What’s so bad about your life?”

“For one thing, I cannot work in this house, and I have a deadline to meet.”

“Deadline, shmedline… Why are they giving you a deadline? Are there greeting card emergencies?”

“Mom. I’m finally hopeful of landing big contracts. Remember how it was in the beginning? Me helping my big sister take cards to craft fairs and small gift shops? How many did she sell?”

“I have no idea.”

“Not a hell of a lot. If she didn’t have a friend in advertising, she might never have gotten the business off the ground. Now that she’s entrusted it to me, I want to make it an even bigger success.”

“If success was so important to her, then she wouldn’t have left the business and moved to India. I’m sure she’d understand if you wanted to quit and get a real job. Maybe you’d meet someone if you worked in an office.”

Bliss actually bit her tongue and counted to ten.

“And this contract is important, I take it.” Her mother prattled on as if Bliss hadn’t said any of the angry, sarcastic things streaming through her brain. Oh, that’s right… for once I managed not to.

“Yes, Mama. It’s a make-it-or-break-it moment. If I deliver the designs I envisioned in the finale, I could win, and Hall-Snark cards will be in all the large chain stores.”

“And if you don’t?”

“It’s back to the craft fairs.”