Eternal

23 ~ Like Sand Through the Hourglass . . .

How’d you do on the history test?” I directed at the back of Aidan’s head. He was sitting at his desk across the room, while I leaned nervously against the door.

“Fine” was all he said in reply. No elaboration, nothing.

“We, uh, probably need to get together with Joshua and Tyler at some point to finish up our art history project. You know, the Girl Before a Mirror thing. And the sculpture one, too.”

“I knew what you meant.” He opened up his laptop and reached for the mouse.

I took a few steps toward the center of the room, standing a few feet behind him. More than anything, I wanted to hurry over to him and wrap my arms around him. Instead, I held myself in check, fearing his rejection.

“Did you turn in any of your paperwork for AUP yet?” I asked, my voice shaky. “I think the housing form is due soon. If we’re waiving student housing, we’re supposed to tell them where we’ll be living. You know, give them an address.”

His only response was a curt nod as he continued doing whatever he was doing on his computer. He wasn’t staying on any website long—it looked like he was just randomly clicking from site to site, just to appear busy.

“So, you’re just going to sit over there and ignore me?” I asked, sinking onto the edge of daybed with a sigh.

He nodded. “That was the plan.”

“C’mon, after all we’ve been through, we’re going to fight over this? I told you it was nothing. He was crying about Kate, Aidan. Seriously. What was I supposed to do?”

“How about not put your hands all over him?” I couldn’t see his face, but his voice was laced with jealousy.

I took a deep, calming breath. “This is crazy. You know that, right? Tyler is my friend, nothing more. And he’s helping with your cure, by the way.”

“What’s that supposed to mean? That I should thank him by giving him carte blanche to feel up my girlfriend whenever the mood strikes him?”

“It wasn’t like that, and you know it. You’re just being difficult. What can I possibly say to make you believe me?”

“How about giving me a little time? Some space, maybe.”

“Are you serious?” I asked incredulously. This was a complete and total overreaction on his part. It didn’t make any sense. “Where’s this really coming from, Aidan? Because this isn’t you. You don’t do the jealous boyfriend thing.”

He let out a heavy sigh and then finally swiveled in his chair to face me. “I think you need to figure out what you want, Violet. What you need. Who you need. There are no guarantees with me—I told you that.”

I just stared at him, stunned by his words. He dropped his gaze, but not before I saw that same haunting emptiness I’d glimpsed before.

“I can’t believe you’re saying this,” I finally managed.

He busied himself with some papers on his desk, avoiding my gaze. “Yeah, well, I can’t believe I saw you with Tyler Bennett’s hands all over you, so I guess we’re even.”

I rose on shaky legs and headed for the door. “I don’t need time or space to think about anything. I know exactly what I want. Maybe you’re the one who needs to do some thinking. Figure out what it is that you want.” I paused to catch my breath, one hand on the doorknob. “Have fun with your dog tonight.”

Without waiting for his response, I stormed out into the corridor, making sure the door slammed shut behind me.

I headed outside, my pace brisk as I walked aimlessly across the quad. I decided to head toward the river, my breath coming faster as I jogged down the path, desperate to clear my head.

Faster and faster I ran, my sneakers pounding against the pavement as I raced past the chapel. With each step, my anger seemed to dissipate, replaced with disappointment instead.

When I reached the bench at the end of the path, I paused, resting my hands on my knees as I caught my breath.

I rose, swiping the sweat from my forehead with the back of one hand. If he needed time, I’d give him time. Clearly, there was more to it than simple jealousy over a misunderstanding. Maybe he was scared. Worried. I knew he thought that he was putting me in danger, so maybe he was acting out of some sort of misplaced guilt. Whatever the case, I wasn’t going to let him push me away so easily.

A calm determination settled over me as I started back toward the dorm, my pace slow and easy now.

When I finally made it back to my room, sixth period had ended and Cece and Sophie were already there, sitting side by side on Cece’s bed with textbooks in their laps.

“Warning, Sophie,” I said sourly. “Your roommate is going wolf tonight.”

“Uh-oh,” she said, setting aside her book. “Does that mean Aidan has to babysit?”

“Yep.” I dropped my bag onto my desk. “Lucky him.”

“Bad day?” Cece asked with a frown.

“You have no idea. I have a headache, too.”

“You want to lie down for a little bit?” she offered. “Sophie and I can go to the lounge.”

“No, but thanks. I’ve got homework.”

“Wouldn’t it be nice if we didn’t have to do any more homework? I mean, now that we’ve already been accepted to college and everything.”

My gaze shot up at once, taking in Cece’s impish grin. “Oh my God! You got an acceptance today, didn’t you?”

“Tulane. Full merit scholarship.”

“That’s awesome!” I hurried over and wrapped her in a hug. “Wow, I’m so happy for you. And . . . any news on Joshua?”

“Duke—his first choice. He’s totally psyched.” She waved one hand in dismissal. “Don’t worry. We’ll figure it out. I mean, if it’s meant to be, it’ll be, right? Anyway, tell her your news, Sophie.”

“You got into Dartmouth?” I asked her, remembering that she was still waiting to hear from them.

“Yeah, but I already accepted at Princeton. Guess who else?”

“Someone else is going to Princeton?” I asked, confused now.

“Not just anyone,” Cece said cryptically. “Go on. Tell her!”

Oh my God. “Not . . . ?”

“Tyler,” Sophie confirmed with a nod. “Crazy, right? I didn’t even know he’d applied there.”

“So . . . is this a good thing?” I asked.

She chewed on her lower lip as she considered the question. “I don’t know. Probably not, right?”

“Depends, I guess,” I hedged. “But seriously, Princeton? Tyler’s grades are that good?”

“I know, right?” Cece plopped back down on her bed. “I wonder if one of his parents went there or something.”

“I don’t know, but his grades really are that good,” Sophie said. “At least, that’s what Dr. Byrne says.”

“Oooh, Matthew,” Cece said, wiggling her fingers at me like she always did when his name came up. “By the way, what’s up with Aidan? He seemed a little . . . uh . . . frosty earlier.”

“Oh, you know . . . he’s just being moody.” I cleared my throat uncomfortably, hoping they wouldn’t question why my cheeks were suddenly red.

“Hey, don’t forget Friday is senior ditch day,” Sophie said, mercifully changing the subject. “We’re supposed to meet at the cemetery at sunrise.”

Cece mock shuddered. “That’s so creepy.”

“But it’s Winterhaven tradition, right?” I asked. “The cemetery and then Sunnyside.”