Eternal

making me shiver.

“What is your thing with necks?” I teased. “I swear, you’d think you were a vampire or something.”

“Very funny. You want to dance?”

“Yes, but pictures first. I don’t want to be all sweaty.” I led him away, toward the far corner of the room, where the formal portraits were being taken. Every couple of seconds, the flash went off, temporarily blinding me as we approached.

“Look, there’re Sophie and Tyler in line. Max and Marissa too. Hurry. Let’s catch up with them before someone else gets in front of us.”

Tyler asking Sophie to prom had been an unexpected surprise. I just hoped he didn’t screw it up. I was glad to see that, for now at least, Sophie was smiling happily. She looked like she was having fun.

“Hey,” I called out, joining them in line just as Sophie and Tyler stepped up to have their pictures taken.

“If it isn’t the king himself,” Marissa said. She looked beautiful in a short, magenta strapless dress with a peplum, paired with black patent Doc Marten boots. Max had coordinated his accessories with a matching bowtie and cummerbund and had dyed the tips of his spiky hair—all a bold magenta.

“Wow, Max,” I said, eyeing him up and down. “You’re really rocking that punk-formal look. Juilliard isn’t going to know what hit them.”

“That reminds me,” he said. “Don’t forget to e-mail me your friend’s name. That ballet chick. I’ll look for her at orientation.”

“Yeah, and give me her cell number,” Marissa said. “I’ll text her as soon as I’m settled in the dorm. We can hang out.”

Come fall, they would all be together—Max and Whitney at Juilliard, Marissa downtown at NYU. I was glad that Whitney would have someone to show her around the city, to introduce her to people. I was just sad that that someone wouldn’t be me.

“Next,” the photographer called out, and Max and Marissa switched places with Sophie and Tyler.

“There you are,” Sophie said. “I was looking for you at the crowning. I didn’t see you anywhere.”

“We went out for air and just barely made it back in time.”

“Good thing you did,” Tyler said. “Can’t have the king miss his own coronation.”

For a moment there, the air crackled with tension. Just ignore him, I told Aidan telepathically.

“But hey, man, congrats on that.” Tyler paused, looking Aidan straight in the eye. “We’re good now, right?”

Several seconds ticked by in strained silence. Finally, Aidan nodded. “We’re good.”

“Next,” the photographer bellowed.

Aidan and I started toward the camera, but I stopped midway, an idea forming in my mind. I turned back toward my friends. “We need a group shot when Aidan and I are done. Someone go find Cece and Josh, quick!”

I saw Max and Tyler dash off while Aidan and I struck our first pose for the camera.

“Okay, little lady, turn a bit more to your left. That’s it. Chin down. Smile, you two.” Pop. We tried several different stiff, awkward poses before Tyler and Max returned with Cece and Joshua in tow.

I motioned for everyone to join us, and we all squashed together, arms looped over shoulders and around backs. Aidan was on one side of me, Sophie on the other. I glanced around at my friends, laughing and smiling as the flash popped, thinking I’d never been happier in all my life. This was perfect . . . well, as close to perfect as it could ever be without Kate. Still, something felt slightly off, but I wasn’t exactly sure what. And then I caught sight of Matthew in my peripheral vision.

“Hey, Dr. B.,” Tyler called out, motioning with one hand. “Come on. You should be in this too.”

“Yeah,” Sophie said, moving over to make room for him between us. “C’mon, you go right here.”

Tears burned behind my eyelids as he squeezed in, an arm thrown carelessly over my shoulder. Now it felt right, I realized as the flash began to pop again. Just so—with Aidan on one side of me, my Megved on the other. And around us, the best friends anyone could ask for. If only I could bottle this moment in time, capture it for eternity.

We were all together, minus Kate and Jack. Together, but never again whole. As the final flash popped, a single tear slipped down my cheek, captured digitally for all time.

27 ~ The End of the Road

I glanced up from the pile of notes in my lap when Cece walked into the room, looking exhausted. “Are you finished?” I asked as she collapsed onto her bed with a groan.

“Yep, done. Finally. What about you? Just that one final left?”

“Yeah, first thing tomorrow morning. I’m going to be cramming all night long. You might want to go stay with Marissa.”

“Nah, I’ll keep you company. I can sleep all day tomorrow. Well, that and start packing.”

“Don’t even say it!” It was only a matter of days before graduation, before we all packed up and left Winterhaven for good. Just thinking about it made me feel sick to my stomach. “Anyway, how’d you do?”

“Fine, I guess. The essay question kicked my butt. I’m just so glad it’s over.”

“Hey, don’t rub it in.” Beside me, my cell began to ring. “Ugh, it’s Patsy. Probably calling to tell me she’s not coming to graduation, after all,” I said sourly, then connected the call. “Hey, there. What’s up?”

“Just calling to see how finals are going,” she chirped.

“Really well. I’ve got my English test tomorrow, and then I’m done.”

“What about the calculus test you were so worried about?”

“I think I aced it, thanks to Aidan.” He’d quizzed me relentlessly, until I could work every problem backward, forward, and sideways. “My history paper’s turned in, and we got an A on our final art history project, so it’s looking pretty good.”

“I knew you’d do just fine,” Patsy said. “Listen, I know I said we’d be there Friday night for graduation, but something’s come up at work.”

Of course it had. “Don’t worry about it,” I said. “Really.”

“But you’ll be in New York next week, right? Before you leave for London? We’ll get to see you then.”

“Sure,” I said. “But look, I’m probably going to stay at Aidan’s when I’m there in the city, okay?” Since it was my place now, technically speaking. Of course, Patsy didn’t know that, but still. It occurred to me that, at some point, I was probably going to have to tell her. Then again, maybe not. Not with her halfway around the world in Australia.

“But we’ll get together for dinner or something, right? We’ll take you both out somewhere nice to celebrate your graduation.”

She was making this way too easy.

“That sounds good. Actually, I better get back to studying now.”

“Okay, sweetie. Good luck. And I’ll be thinking about you Friday night. Paul too. He sends his love.”

“Thanks,” I said. “Talk to you later.”

I ended the call and set down my phone with a sigh.

“She’s not coming?” Cece asked.

“Nope. Big surprise, right?” Still, I was disappointed. There wouldn’t be a single person there to cheer for me when I walked across that stage and took my diploma. How pathetic was that? Aidan and I were lucky that we had each other, since neither of us had anyone else.

“I just don’t get that woman,” Cece said, shaking her head.

“Yeah, me either. It doesn’t matter, though. I just wish Gran could come.” She’d wanted to, and I’d had several long talks with Melanie, her home health aide, debating it. Melanie had finally spoken with Gran’s doctor, who had failed to give his support, and that had been that. Gran wasn’t happy, but I’d promised to come visit them