Tandem

bodyguard. Thomas Mayhew.”

“Mayhew?” The Shepherd let loose a bitter bark of a laugh. “The General’s son? The toy soldier.”

“Don’t call him that,” she snapped. She knew how much Thomas hated it.

“All right. Yes. You have my word. They’ll all be safe when—when the time comes.” The Shepherd held out his hand and she placed the piece of paper in his palm. He stared at it for a long time, his mouth curling in an unattractive frown.

“He was right,” the Shepherd whispered. “It won’t be long now.”

“What do you mean?”

“Nothing,” he said, standing and putting the chair back in its place. “You’ll stay here for a few more days. We need time to arrange things. When we’re ready, you’ll know it.”

“What are you going to do?”

He paused at the door, his head tilted, as if he was listening for music she couldn’t hear. “It won’t be long now,” he repeated. And then he was gone.

Thomas hoisted me up by my arms, gathering me close and placing me gently on the concrete. My heart was beating so fast I thought it might burst out of my chest and my head was full of so many foreign images I could hardly tell where I was or what was happening. One minute I’d been hanging off the roof of the Tower, and the next I was in the attic room of the farmhouse, everything so sharp it was as if I was actually there. I was shaking so hard it was as if my bones were rattling around loose in my body.

Thomas crouched in front of me. “Are you okay?”

I punched him squarely in the throat. He toppled backward, his hands flying to his neck, his mouth forming a tiny O of surprise.

“What the hell?” he managed to choke out.

“You bastard!” I cried. “How could you do that to me? I could have died.”

Thomas shook his head. “I—had—you.”

“Oh yeah? And what if you let go? How were you planning to explain the fact that the princess fell from the roof?” A sob rose in my chest and I fought to suppress it, knowing that I would crumble to pieces if I didn’t.

Dr. Moss’s cragged face hovered mere inches from mine. “We needed to push you to the very breaking point,” he told me. “There is no other way. You needed to be truly afraid.”

“Shut up!” I screamed. “You’re crazy, you know that? You’re both completely insane.”

“You saw something, didn’t you?” Dr. Moss gripped me by the shoulders, shaking me slightly. “What did you see?”

“I don’t know!” I tried to fight him off, but I didn’t have the strength.

“But you made contact,” Dr. Moss insisted. “You saw through Juliana’s eyes—you were able to force your way through to the other end of the tether. Where is she? What did you see?”

“Nothing!” Dr. Moss’s eyes were wild, and his desperation was terrifying me. How could I have been so foolish as to think that I could use my connection with Juliana to my advantage? It was only one more way in which they had me trapped.

“That’s not true,” Dr. Moss said.

“Mossie!” Thomas shoved him away. “Leave her alone. Can’t you see she’s scared?”

“I need to get out of here,” I said, pressing the heels of my hands into my eyes and rubbing hard, as if by doing so I could erase everything I’d seen.

“You can’t,” Dr. Moss cried. “You have to process what you saw!”

Thomas slipped his arms under mine, lifting me off the ground. I leaned against him, too tired to resist his help. “We’re leaving. You and I will talk later,” he said to Dr. Moss. “I’ve got to get her back to the Castle before someone starts wondering where she is.”

I tried not to think about the people waiting for me back at the Castle. I would deal with them later; right then, my priority was getting the hell off that roof.

“Come on,” Thomas said, guiding me back to the elevator. “Lean on me. We’re almost there.” 

TWENTY-FOUR

By the time we’d gotten back to Juliana’s bedroom, I was feeling much better. My heart rate was back to normal and I could draw full breaths again; I was calm enough to hold the glass of water Thomas had brought me, taking small sips to soothe my parched throat. I reclined on the bed, propped up by a couple of pillows; Thomas paced like a jungle cat a few feet away.

“I can’t believe I did that,” he said, raking his fingers through his hair in frustration.

Now that I’d recovered a little, I was less frantic and more forgiving. After all, I’d gone up on that roof voluntarily; I’d agreed to do whatever it took. I didn’t think they’d go so far as to nearly throw me off the building, but now that the experience was over and done with that was not what was bothering me. I’d achieved my goal— I’d opened the connection with Juliana, and any time I wanted to now I could dip back in, find the tether again, and travel through it to the other side, if only in my mind. But after what I had seen I wasn’t sure I wanted to anymore. Because what I’d discovered was the answer to a question I’d never even thought to ask.

Juliana had been complicit in her own kidnapping. She had walked willingly into the hands of Libertas in exchange for her own freedom. And she and I were the only ones who knew. She, and I, and the mysterious Janus, the person with whom she’d arranged her escape. But who was he? Why in the world had she done it? And, the biggest question of all—how was I going to tell Thomas? Because clearly he had no idea. He believed that Juliana had been kidnapped, and when Thomas believed in things, he did so wholly and without question.

I couldn’t help but feel a burning sense of betrayal. Juliana was just as responsible for my presence in Aurora as anyone else. And not only that, but she’d turned her back on her country, abandoning her family and her responsibilities in pursuit of … what, exactly? What could Libertas possibly give her that was worth leaving behind the only life she’d ever known? I wished the tether allowed me to see into her private mind as well as her surroundings, but I couldn’t hear her thoughts, only what she said and what was said to her. It wasn’t enough. There was so much more I needed to know.

I couldn’t blame her for wanting to get away. The longer I stayed in Aurora, the more I saw how lonely and trapped she must have felt. And with the arranged marriage to Callum, the fate of two countries weighing on her shoulders, maybe it wasn’t so difficult to understand why she had done what she’d done. If it had been me, would I have done the same?

Thomas would be horrified when he found out. I could tell that he put a lot of faith in her, and even though I hated to admit it to myself, I was jealous of that faith. His loyalties, too, lay with Juliana, and he wanted her back as soon as possible. Of course he does, I told myself. It was childish for me to expect him to prefer me. But I didn’t like being a placeholder, a poor substitute for someone else. It made me feel cheap and used and extraneous. More than ever, I wished that I could return to my normal life. At least there, I could be who I was. At least at home, I had people who loved me instead of people who loved the person they thought that I was. I was trying not to think of Granddad, of Gina, because I knew that if I started I would never be able to stop, that I would be consumed with missing them. But it was so hard, and I was so tired. I just wanted this all to be over.

Still, I couldn’t bring myself to tell Thomas about Juliana—not just yet. My heart swelled with tenderness for him, so strong that it was almost overwhelming, and I searched in vain for something to say to him.

“How’s your neck?” I settled on at last.

“What?” He glanced up in surprise. “Oh, fine. How’s your hand?”

I was cradling my right hand gingerly in my left. “A little sore,” I admitted.

He laughed. “Well, that’s normal. You’ve never punched anyone before, have you?”

I shook my head. “Not really my thing.”