Fifteen Minutes

what we feel isn’t real?”

“I . . .” His control was dissolving.

“You feel something now, Zack. I know you do.” The sound of her whispers and the feel of her body against his, the way she kept pressing her fingers and thumbs into his back, all of it stirred his desire to an even greater level. He could see himself turning around and taking her in his arms, kissing her the way he wanted to kiss her. He gritted his teeth. No . . . he couldn’t. He wouldn’t do that to Reese.

Gradually the backrub stopped and she moved her soft hands to his bare arms. With the lightest feather touch, she ran her fingertips down his triceps all the way to his elbows. The feeling pushed Zack closer to the edge. Run, he told himself. You can’t do this. But he stayed. He stayed and he loved every second, every feeling her touch ignited in him. She leaned her face closer to his again, their bodies making full contact. “We both feel it . . . and it is real.”

That was it. The physical pull was like an assault, a full-blown attack against which he was completely defenseless. Every cell in his body wanted to go with the wave instead of fighting it. He squeezed his eyes shut. “Please . . . Zoey.”

“Come on.” Her lips touched the skin on his neck, and again her fingers traveled down his arms. “Turn around and tell me you don’t want me.”

His head slowly fell back against her. He was losing the battle, failing the test. Then he remembered something Reese had said before his audition. Something about time apart. So that they could figure out who they were. Zoey ran her hands down his arms again. Zack clenched his jaw, barely able to breathe. Maybe Reese was right. Maybe he needed this so he could be sure.

“Zack . . .” She came around in front of him and took his hands and gently turned him so he was facing her, his feet on the ground.

He slid to the edge of the sofa arm.

It was happening . . . he couldn’t fight his desire another second. He moved his feet slightly apart and she easily took the spot between them. Like that they were face-to-face and her arms came around his neck. “Hold me.” She touched her lips to his neck. “Please, Zack.”

He did as she asked, pulling her closer and wrapping his arms around her back, her waist. The hug didn’t last long before he was kissing her. Making out with her the way he had longed to do since they walked upstairs. His desire doubled and the kiss grew more intense, more passionate.

“Don’t stop.” She spoke softly against his neck, kissing him several times there before returning to his lips.

He moved his hands along her back and thought about the dark-lit room and the sofa and how easy it would be to lie down with her here and—

Suddenly he slid back. What was he thinking? How had this happened? He created distance between them. With a strength not his own he worked his legs over the sofa arm onto the other side and moved three steps away from her. “Wow.” He laced his fingers together at the back of his neck and hung his head. For a long moment he only focused on breathing, desperate for control. Stay here, Zack. Don’t go back. How had things gotten so out of control? He waited until the fires coursing through him cooled a little. Then he lifted his eyes to hers.

“I can’t . . . do this.” He shook his head. His breathing was nowhere near normal.

She was out of breath, too, and shame colored her expression—even in the dark-lit room. “You just did.” She knit her brow, clearly hurt. “Think about us, Zack. Stop lying to yourself.”

Thoughts of the kiss consumed him again. His body screamed for her, but this time he ignored the demands. He stood a little taller. “There is no us.”

For a few seconds she stared at him. Then slowly she nodded. “Fine.” She crossed her arms. “Friendship? Is that what this is?”

“You don’t make it easy.” He exhaled, frustrated more at himself. “Look, I’m sorry.” He kept his distance, not wanting to be drawn in again. “I care about you.”

“Care? Concern? Those were your feelings a minute ago?”

“How do you expect me to feel?” He felt beyond defeated. “Nothing’s normal. The show . . . all of it.” He still felt drawn to her, but he held his ground. “You’re very beautiful, Zoey. You needed someone. The backrub . . .” He held his breath for a few seconds and then exhaled hard. “The lines get blurred.”

“Yeah.” She pulled her hair to one side and stared at him, pride flashing in her eyes. “For both of us.”

“Okay.” The reality of what he’d done was hitting him. He felt awful. Not only because of Reese but because his actions had clearly confused things. Before another moment passed he had to be absolutely clear. “Look, I do care for you. But before this show and after it I will love the same girl.”

Once more tears shone in her eyes. “Fine.” She found a sad smile and some of her usual composure. “I’m going to sleep.”

Another realization hit Zack square in the heart. This would’ve been a perfect time to talk about God. But in light of his weakness, the conversation would clearly have to wait. “Good night.”

She hesitated and her expression said it all. If he wanted to stick by his girlfriend, then she would stop trying. And she certainly wasn’t going to hug him good night the way she usually would. She took a few steps toward the hallway, the one that led to the elevators. “Good night.”

He watched her walk off. The moment she stepped out of sight he remembered the cameras. He searched the room but couldn’t see one. That didn’t mean someone wasn’t watching. Why hadn’t he thought of that when he started kissing her? He walked to the window and stood there. Just stood there and wondered what had happened.

He had told her the truth. He loved Reese. But in those minutes all he’d wanted was Zoey Davis. How was that possible? And what did it say about him? He leaned against the windowsill and tried to make sense of it all. But he couldn’t.

Exhaustion seized him. How could he have let things get so crazy? He closed his eyes, disgusted at himself. What had happened here wouldn’t happen again. He would be more careful. God, I’m sorry . . . I failed tonight. A shiver came over him and he stared up between the buildings at a sliver of the dark sky over New York City. He was slipping. He could feel it. I thought I could do this, Lord . . . what’s wrong with me? Please make me stronger. Despite the highs and lows of the day, he felt a hint of inner strength, one that wasn’t his own. The pace was so crazy, the situation so extreme. Of course he had kissed her. Next time he’d be smarter. He would avoid going anywhere alone with her, and late nights would be with the group only.

He remembered the warning from Chandra Olson. How she’d lost her fiance during her run on Fifteen Minutes. Sure, God would forgive him, and Zoey, too. But the question that remained, the one that kept him awake and broke his heart long after he turned out the lights, was this:

What about Reese?

chapter 24

Reese didn’t get a call from Zack until early the next day. It was well before lunch and she was teaching when she felt her phone vibrate. She glanced at the screen and saw that the message was from him. Walls in her heart shot up. He could wait. Her session was with Toby, and she wasn’t about to cut it short just because Zack finally responded.

Half an hour later she read his text. Baby, we need to talk. The contestants didn’t watch last night’s show until early this morning and then we had some appearance in Washington Square. I couldn’t use my phone till now. Anyway . . . I saw the Romeo segment and I’m sick. Baby, everything’s turned around and I need to explain. I’m so sorry, Reese. Please . . . call me.

Reese didn’t feel anything. Zack had changed—the video had told her that much. He followed his first text with three others. Reese, are you there? A few minutes later, Baby, please call me. And two minutes after that, I know you’re upset. I’m sorry. We have to