lay now. Albert had given me his greatcoat, but I still could not sleep. My clothes dried out slowly. Then punctually at 12 o’clock the Russians resumed their midday concert, plastering us with mortar fire as we crouched down in our dugout.

After about half an hour the firing eased off and Albert lay down to sleep, while I wrote a letter to my parents. Now and again a shot would whip past whenever one of us moved incautiously.

That evening I went back to our neighbouring company to see Meieringh. The first thing he told me was that both Hinnerk Otterstedt and Pohlmeyer were dead. Pohlmeyer had left his foxhole and been shot in the head by a sniper. Otterstedt had gone to help him and been shot too. So now after only two days we had already lost two dead, and when I spoke to Warrelmann and Bucklers later, they both said the same thing: ‘Will I be next?’

Thoroughly depressed, I returned to our foxhole and told Albert Schimmel about it. He commented that they would not be the last.

I was then supposed to go back to the company command post and pick up the rations, but as I did not know my way around in the wood, Albert volunteered to go for me. I waited half an hour, an hour, but he did not come back. The Russians were firing again with all calibres, and we were not saving our ammunition either. I was firing at their muzzle flashes with my machine gun.

As Albert still did not return, I reported to the platoon leader, who sent off the platoon runner, Heinz Warelmann, to find him. Albert had been shot through the arm. As Albert’s replacement, I got Sergeant Gillner, who had been posted into the company at the same time as myself.

There was no opportunity for us to get a wash or a shave. Gradually we became more relaxed, not ducking with every shot or explosion. You became hardened to it all, you got used to this kind of life and just faced up to whatever was coming. After a while, the effects of fatigue began to show. My face had fallen in and the fat that I had accumulated in the peaceful days of Lubeck was soon gone. But the rations were quite good. Every day we got half a loaf of bread and something to put on it, and every evening we got something from the field kitchen, although it was always cold.

The Russians shelled us regularly at noon, so that we could practically set the time by it. Werner Bucklers was wounded by one of these bombardments when he failed to reach the bunker fast enough, getting a splinter in the thigh.

By the time we had been out there three or four days, the third one of us Lubeckers, Bernhard Meieringh, had been killed and Bebensee wounded in the neighbouring company. We had not yet been a week at the front and had already lost three dead and two wounded.

Whenever the weather was favourable, the Russian fighters and ground-attack aircraft came and dropped bombs and fired their guns. However, they did not bother us much, as these attacks were mainly directed to our rear. The Russians resumed their concert punctually on 2 March, but much more heavily than before. When the bombardment had gone on for over half an hour and started intensifying, we knew that an attack would surely follow. There was a frightful noise out there. I sat in the bunker with Gillner. There was a howling and banging with splinters whistling around and striking the tree stumps, branches flying about, sand and muck flying everywhere, and a hot smell in the air. In between, one could hear the cries of the wounded. At last, after nearly two hours, the firing stopped abruptly. Then we knew: ‘They are coming now!’

The next moment the Russian rifle and machine gun fire opened up, mixed with the ‘Urrahs!’ of the Ivans. The Russians leapt over the railway embankment on our right without encountering serious resistance. Only a few of us had survived the bombardment, which had been particularly heavy in that sector, and those that could not flee were soon overwhelmed by superior numbers. I could hear the din of the advancing Russians on the right, but could see none of them because of the wood. Nor could we leave our positions, for we had to expect the Russians coming across the Alte Oder in front of us. They kept advancing and were soon behind us. They encountered little resistance from Rathstock and had soon taken the village. This made us uncomfortable, for the Russians were now in front, behind and on either side of us. They continued to advance and were only stopped just short of Sachsendorf.[4] Our neighbouring company had withdrawn and we were now cut off.[5] Heinz Warrelmann, our platoon runner, brought the order to withdraw, and we assembled at the company command post. Our platoon was now 26 men strong.

The greatest difficulty was getting out of our holes unseen. The Russians had naturally identified each hole and closed in around us. Of our four, Gillner and myself were the lucky survivors. Covering all sides, we came to the edge of the wood. What we then saw made our blood run cold. Thousands of Russians were streaming past unhindered, tanks, guns and carts, all going west. They were only 200 metres from us and had no idea that we were still in the wood, believing that we had retreated.

Staff Sergeant Lauffen gave the order not to open fire on any account, as it would only give us away. We dug in and waited for evening. The rest of the company was about 300 metres north of us and we could only communicate by runner.

Second Lieutenant Reifferscheidt ordered our platoon to break through with the company at nightfall. A reconnaissance party had found a position that appeared to be only weakly occupied and that was where the breakthrough would occur. When Second Lieutenant Reifferscheidt sent his company runner, Grenadier Reiffen, to us, he got lost in the wood and did not find us for quite some time. Meanwhile the company of about 60 men had split up.

Now our platoon was on its own and no one knew which way the company had gone. Nearly all the buildings in Rathstock were on fire and, although we were about 600 metres away, it was as light as day.

Before breaking out we destroyed everything that could hinder or betray us; without tent halves,[6] haversacks, messtins and gasmasks. We only had our rifles as we left the wood when it was fully dark. In front was Staff Sergeant Lauffen, then the company runner, Grenadier Reiffen, Sgt Krahl, myself, Sgt Gillner, Heinz Warrelmann and then the remainder of the platoon. We could expect to be spotted by the Russians at any moment and be fired upon. Not a word was said. At first we went through the wood, then crossed a road and came to a field that gradually sloped up to Rathstock.

Suddenly we were called upon in the middle of the field: ‘Halt! Hands up!’. Twenty metres in front of us was a heavy Russian machine gun. They had seen us and immediately opened fire. Standing we would all have been killed, so we threw ourselves down, but we could not return the fire without hitting each other.

What now? Turn back? But that would offer the enemy a much better target. The Russians had dug in and were hard to see. However, before we could make up our minds, shots started landing among us and we had to lie still. It was frightening lying there, unable to shoot back. The Russians were using explosive bullets. I could see the shots exploding around us, and muck and sand was blowing into our faces. I thought: ‘This is it!’ I pressed my face to the ground, not wanting to look any more, and listened and waited for the end.

Then sub-machine guns could be heard firing. None of us cried out. I could not understand it. Were they all dead then? Then Staff Sergeant Lauffen started shouting: ‘Comrades, stop firing, we are wounded!’

The Russians kept on firing. Staff Sergeant Lauffen shouted once more and then was silent. When the Russians reopened fire, I grabbed Krahl by the leg and said: ‘Come on Krahl, fire, fire!’ for he was the only one with a machine gun. He did not answer. I tugged him again. His face dropped from his arm into the sand. He was dead! Carefully I dragged myself toward Gillner. He lay with his head in the sand. I pushed his helmet back and saw his eyes: dead.

Something came flying through the air. Hand grenades! I lay still, unable to move. A hand grenade landed only two metres from me, and I could see the sparks. Then it exploded. I received a tremendous blow on my helmet, the blast taking my breath away, and sand pattered down around me, but I was not wounded. Apparently a splinter had struck my helmet, leaving a dent behind. The helmet had saved my life.

Several more hand grenades followed, then it was quiet. Then someone moved up in front. ‘Now they are coming,’ I thought, ‘but they are not going to get me alive. Before I go, I will take someone with me!’. Preferring to sell my life as dearly as possible, I took the pin out of a hand grenade and was about to throw it, when I saw that it was Grenadier Reiffen. With his small body he had found cover behind Staff Sergeant Lauffen and so remained unwounded. ‘Come on, back!’, he said.

Then someone came crawling up from behind. It was Harry Warrelmann. ‘Gerd, are you wounded?’ he asked.

‘No, are you?’

‘Yes, four times – chest, stomach, bottom and thigh.’

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