uncomfortable silence. The woman, Emma, looked nervous as she pulled her hands from her pockets and began to wring them together.
“William,” she said quietly.
“Call me Will.” I struggled to sit up and pushed the button on the side of the bed to meet my back.
“Will…uh…do you remember me?” she asked as she raised her gaze to meet mine. I searched her face for any sign of familiarity, but there was none. It was like a black void in my brain. Her eyes filled with tears, and I knew we must know each other very well. My eyes danced over her petite frame, and I wondered if I had had her. She nodded in understanding as a lone tear spilled over and rolled down her cheek. She stood frozen as her eyes pleaded with me to remember. My chest ached as I watched her.
“Hey, don’t cry. Come here.” She slowly sat down beside me and broke down, sobbing. I wrapped my arms around her and pulled her against my chest, her breasts pushed against me. “Shhh.” The smell of flowers filled my nose, and I knew she was someone important to me, but my mind was a fog. Her fingers twisted in my gown, and she cried as I rubbed my hand up and down her back to soothe her. It was odd being the one in the hospital bed and comforting someone else. She seemed so weak, so fragile, and I wanted to protect her from whatever it was that was causing her so much pain.
“You said you would never forget me.” She pulled back slowly and placed her hand on my chest. I felt my heart rate speed up, and the machine next to my bed beeped at the increase. I pushed her tangled hair from her face and tucked it behind her ear. She was so broken…so delicate.
The doctor returned with a nurse, and I forced myself to take my eyes off Emma. “Well, looks like you two have been getting reacquainted.” She looked down at her lap as she slid off the bed and leaned up against the wall. The nurse stepped between us and handed me a small cup of pills. I dumped them in my mouth as I watched the frightened woman against the wall. She was hurting, and I had the overwhelming urge to protect her, but I didn’t know where to begin if I couldn’t even remember how we had known each other.
The doctor began to speak, and I tried to focus on his instructions as the medicine slowly began to kick in, and the throbbing became a dull ache in the back of my mind.
“I don’t expect the memory loss to be long term. It is not uncommon for a head trauma such as the one you received. You’ll need to call me if the headaches worsen or if you have any problems with your vision.” He turned to look at Emma who was lost in her own thoughts and staring out at nothing. “I’m sure Ms. Townsend will be helping you to make the transition as smooth as possible. She will need to take it easy as well.”
The room fell silent as all eyes were on Emma. She looked up and shook her head in a daze. “I’m sorry?”
“You will be helping him with his transition at home, correct?”
She wiped a stray tear that clung to her bottom lashes and nodded her head in agreement. I couldn’t understand why, if we were so close, she seemed to hesitate at the idea of taking care of me. Not that I expected anyone to. I didn’t want to be a burden to anyone else.
“Good. All looks well, and we should be able to have you out of here in no time.”
“Thank you.”
The doctor smiled down at me before he and the nurse left the room, leaving me alone with Emma. I watched her as she looked around nervously before making her way over to a chair on the other side of my bed. She grabbed her purse, dug around in it, and pulled out a set of keys. She avoided looking at me, and her dark hair hung down, partially blocking my view of her face, but I could tell she was sad. And it seemed more about being around me than the accident we had together.
I wasn’t stupid, and I knew I had done something pretty terrible to make her react that way to someone who had just come out of a coma. She was struggling to not break down, and now I was supposed to have her come home with me and take care of me. I thought about calling my parents to see if they would mind taking a few days off and fly out to see me, but spending any time with my father was fucking torture, and I wanted to be alone with Emma.
It was odd they weren’t here already, and that made me doubt how close I could possibly be to this woman.
A nurse came in the room with two trays of food, and I suddenly realized how hungry I was. I grabbed my fork and began to dive into the Salisbury steak. It wasn’t the best food in the world, but cardboard would have been satisfying at that point. I watched Emma push her food around the plate, not taking a bite. I knew it wasn’t gourmet, but it was better than nothing, and she looked like she was too thin as it was.
“You should eat something.” I smiled as her head tilted up, and her beautiful eyes locked on to mine. She cut off a small bite and stuck it in her mouth but didn’t say a word.
Whatever I had done to her, it was probably for the best that I didn’t know what it was. We sat in silence for the next few hours. The television mounted in the corner of the room provided a little background noise to keep it from being completely awkward. I couldn’t keep my mind off the stranger who kept me company. I wanted to ask her how we had met or what the nature of our relationship was, but I knew it would probably upset her further. It was strange looking at someone for what felt like the first time, but knowing that there was a deeper connection there.
As it grew later, I watched her curl up in a chair next to my bed, fresh tears in her eyes. I knew I needed to send her home. I couldn’t make her suffer any longer at my side.
“Emma…” I struggled to find the words to thank her and ask her to leave without sounding like an asshole.
“Good night,” she called out without looking up at me. She tucked her legs into her chest and closed her eyes.
It didn’t take me long to drift off to sleep. I dreamed I was standing along the side of a highway with sheets of rain pouring down on me. Lightning flashed, and thunder rumbled deep and low. Through the noise, I could hear tires screeching across asphalt and the sound of a horrifying car accident.
I ran out into the rain, searching for the vehicle, unable to see through all the rain. My body collided with the mangled remains of a small black car, and as I wiped my hand over the window, I saw my own lifeless body hunched over the wheel with smatters of blood across my face.
I jerked awake, my eyes landing on the chair where Emma slept curled in a ball. Her eyes fluttered open as if she felt me looking at her. I smiled, and she sucked her lower lip between her teeth as she pushed herself up and stretched her arms.
I wanted to ask her about the dream, about the accident, but I knew she was dreading being with me, and I didn’t want to upset her more.
After a few hours of being examined and given enough instructions to fill a book, I was told I could finally go home.
Emma looked relieved, and she gathered our things as quickly as possible so we could get out of there.
The ride home didn’t help to jog my memory. It was incredibly frustrating to know that my own mind was working against me. I wondered if what had happened was so traumatic that I was protecting myself. If that was the case, why couldn’t I force my mind to open up?
“Not much farther,” Emma said as she looked over at me. I glanced out the windshield, wishing something made sense, but it was all a blank. At least I wasn’t alone.
“This is ours?” I asked as I glanced over to her. She smiled as she tucked her hair behind her ear and dropped her gaze to her feet.
“This is yours. I live…somewhere else.”
I felt like an asshole for assuming that we had lived together. Perhaps we were just really good friends. But even with no memory, I knew that my chest wouldn’t tighten every time I looked into her eyes if she weren’t someone important to me. I knew she wouldn’t be having such a hard time being around me if that were the case.
