White Trash Damaged

I furrowed my brow, searching his eyes.

“I wouldn’t miss it for the world.” I gave him a smile, but there was a look of concern in his eyes. “Go get ready before the wicked witch casts a spell on me.”

He laughed, shaking his head as he made his way to a back corner of the room toward a door that read DRESSING ROOM. I crossed my arms over my stomach as I wandered toward Terry and Chris who were hanging out against the far right wall. They smiled and greeted me when they noticed me, and I felt more at ease in the strange place.

“How’s it going?” I asked as I watched a petite blonde blot Terry’s cheek with makeup.

“They’re making us bitches, Cass,” Chris whined, and I snorted as the woman gave him a glare.

Two women walked toward us, and I realized they were twins as well. They wore only white bikinis and had tattoos covering their bodies. My eyes danced over the artwork on their skin, in awe at how beautiful they were.

“It’s not real,” one said with a heavy accent that I couldn’t place.

“You’re kidding?” I stepped closer to inspect the fake tattoos. “That’s incredible.”

“Thank you,” the woman who was still correcting the other twin’s makeup called over her shoulder to me.

“Girls,” called out the man who had spoken to Tucker earlier. I assumed he was a director or producer or something to that effect, but I didn’t want to ask and look stupid. The female twins scurried past me in their towering high heels and made their way to the bed. My stomach tied in knots as I looked back at Chris and Terry.

“It’s for our scene,” Terry spoke up, alleviating my fears. I sighed and smiled back at him, grateful he put my mind at ease. I glanced back over my shoulder at the man as he had the women sprawl out over the bed, positioning them like human Barbie dolls until he had them at the angle he preferred.

He yelled for Chris and Terry who had large smiles on their faces as they hurried to join the women. I backed against the wall and watched as they climbed into the bed, happier than I had ever seen them. I rolled my eyes and the makeup artist smiled as she watched me.

“First time?” she asked, and I wasn’t sure what she meant, but her question sent a blush spreading over my skin like wildfire. “Music video, I mean.”

“Yeah.” I nodded as I watched the twins begin to make out with their female counterparts as the camera moved closer to them.

“It’s not that bad. All make-believe. They look like they are enjoying themselves now, but I guarantee you that when the day is over, they will be exhausted and miserable.” I raised my eyebrows as I watched their hands roam all over the women.

“Somehow I doubt that.”

She laughed and patted me on the shoulder before disappearing behind the door that Tucker had gone in earlier. My eyes shifted to Eric as he continued to take direction and figure out the best way to shoot his part of the video.

A few minutes passed and four women came out of the makeup area, giggling.

“He is such a good kisser.” One of them laughed as the other scoffed.

“Please, his hands were all over my body.”

I stiffened, wondering who they were referring to. Eric glanced up and shot them a wink, causing them to erupt in a fit of giggles. I sighed and relaxed back into the wall. I don’t know what had gotten into me, but the entire situation was beginning to overwhelm me. I knew Tucker was a rock star and this was what he wanted out of life, but I didn’t know how much of the lifestyle he intended to partake in.

After nearly twenty minutes of watching Eric flirt with the girls and the twins rolling around in bed with the other twins, I was beginning to fall asleep. I sank down against the wall and yawned as I watched them shoot scene after scene of what looked like the same thing.

“Tucker,” a girl squealed, and I turned to see Tucker come out of the back room. He was wearing a plain white cotton tee and dark-wash jeans. He looked like he always did, and I wondered what they could have been doing to him for so long. The girl was in front of him, partially obstructing my view, but he glanced around her and winked at me, causing my heart to melt in my chest.

I stood, stretching, still sore from the long ride on the back of Tucker’s bike. The director called Tucker over to him and began giving him direction. I wanted to walk over, but Donna beat me to it, and I knew, as much as I hated it, this was part of her job and I had no place in it.

Eric made his way to me with a huge grin on his face.

“Twenty bucks says I can fuck at least two of them before the day is over.”

I cringed at his crude comment, but it secretly made me happy for him that he was moving past his crush on Sarah.

“Shouldn’t be too hard.” I looked around him at the girls as they stared at his back adoringly.

“Not hard at all.” He spun around and smiled at them.

“That’s what she said.”

Eric doubled over laughing, causing everyone to turn in our direction.

“She would never say that. Seriously, you suck at this.” His face was red as tears filled his eyes from laughing so hard. It was great to see him so carefree. It was a rare occasion, and I knew it was a big deal. Eric pulled me in for a hug, and I tensed, not used to him being affectionate with me or anyone, for that matter. I hugged him back as I glanced over at Tucker, his jaw clenched and his brow furrowed as he watched us. I pulled back, not sure if he was upset.

I smiled at Eric as he shook his head and made his way back to the scantily clad women. His arms were stretched out to his sides.

“Who wants to find out how hard a drummer can bang?”

The girls giggled, and I shook my head, laughing and glancing back to Tucker, but he wasn’t there. I scanned the area and found him mounting the motorcycle. A brunette got on behind him, wrapping her long tanned limbs around his body. My heart rate went into overdrive as I watched her lean in and whisper something in his ear, causing him to laugh as his hand went to hers around his waist. My heart was thudding so loudly in my ears I didn’t hear Donna’s voice until she repeated herself.

“He looks good out there.”

I didn’t respond, keeping my eyes locked on my boyfriend.

“You should take a walk, maybe pick up some lunch.” Her voice wasn’t threatening and didn’t have its usual edge to it.

“I’m not hungry,” I replied as I wrapped my arms around myself. Tucker spoke to the director as the model’s hands continued to roam over him. She looked in my direction as she said something to him, and he glanced our way, nodding and laughing again at something she said. Jealousy coiled in my belly, winding me tighter, and I wanted to explode. This is his job, I reminded myself. But you’re the one he chose to have on the back of his bike.

“Suit yourself.” Donna walked back over to Tucker and said a few things, everyone’s attention on her. Tucker made a face, and I couldn’t tell if he was frustrated or angry. He looked my way as they continued to speak quietly. Donna glanced over her shoulder, smiling. What I wouldn’t give to wipe that smirk off her face.

The model climbed off the back of his bike, and my heart began to beat normally again until she walked toward me. I held my breath as she approached, but she continued by and disappeared into the dressing room.

I wiped my damp palms on my jeans and tried to relax. The twins made their way across the room, and I wanted to carry on a conversation with them to put myself at ease, but they barely noticed me as they flirted with the other set of twins. I felt completely out of place, wishing I had a pen and paper so I could process some of the feelings that were brewing inside of me. I closed my eyes and began to count down from ten.

“You all right?” Eric asked, and I opened my eyes to see him beside me, his hands shoved in his jean pockets.

“Yeah.” I faked a smile, and he cocked his head.

“You expect me to believe that?” He leaned back against the wall beside me. I wanted to open up to him like he had with me, but I was concerned with the way Tucker had looked at me when we’d hugged. Suddenly I felt