Transcendence

“Don’t!” Giacomo yells, the anguish in his voice matching mine when I called for Griffon just minutes before.

I make a move toward her, but that just makes her hand shake more. She’s fired it twice already, and this time I know she really won’t miss. All of a sudden I want us all to get off this roof alive. I force my voice to sound calm and even. “This wasn’t the solution last time. Killing yourself just made things worse.”

“But it makes the pain stop,” she says. “For a while, at least.” She turns away from us, shaking her head again. “It’s better this way.”

My mind is racing. No more blood should be spilled over what Barone did so many years ago. “But what if Alessandra is back?” I ask quickly. I let go of Griffon’s hand and walk slowly around to face her. “What if you were right, and her essence is in this city somewhere, looking for you?” I take a deep breath as I see the end of the gun move away from her chest just a tiny bit.

Behind her I see Griffon moving toward us, Giacomo doing nothing to stop him. His footsteps make faint crunching sounds on the gravel, so I keep talking. “Are you willing to give up this chance to find her? For what? It might be decades before you can come back and look for her again.”

Just as she’s about to answer, Giacomo lunges at her, grabbing for the gun, but Veronique isn’t willing to let it go easily.

“Do you care nothing for me?” he shouts as he pulls the gun away from her body. “Is it so easy for you to take what I love?”

Veronique shrieks in frustration as Giacomo wrenches her hand back and the gun skitters across the gravel. His arms surround her as her struggles fade, and soon the only sound is her quiet sobbing.

Griffon reaches over and grabs the gun, putting it in his pocket before rushing to my side.

“Are you okay?”

I reach up to wipe some blood from his cheek. “Are you? This is all my fault. I should have listened to you. I should have trusted you. I’m so sorry.”

“Let’s get out of here,” Griffon says, and without looking back at either of them, we head for the stairwell.

Griffon pulls me with him as we rush down several flights. We don’t speak, although a thousand things come into my head that I want to say.

Griffon breaks the silence as we reach the ground floor. “I just need you to believe that I would never do anything to hurt you. I can’t stand going through the rest of this life alone. Without you.”

“I know,” I say, tears starting to form in my eyes. “Oh God, I know. I’m so sorry.”

Griffon takes my hand and grips it tightly. “But you do now? You believe me?” The desperation in his eyes makes me feel guilty and hopeful all at the same time. “I wasn’t Akhet back then. I didn’t know what else to do.”

I shake my head. “I don’t want to talk about then. It’s over. We’re not those people anymore. All I want is now. And tomorrow. And the tomorrow after that.”

“There’s just one thing.” Griffon stops just before opening the door to the hallway. “I let you down again.”

“What are you talking about?”

“I was supposed to save you, and instead you saved me.”

“Maybe it was my turn this time,” I say, pulling him down into a desperate kiss. “Next time it’s yours.”

Twenty~Five

I grab my bag off the hallway table. “I’m going now,” I call to Mom, just as she hangs up the phone.

“Do you need a ride?” she asks, meeting me at the door.

“Yes. Thanks.” I lean over and give her a quick kiss on the cheek. “Griffon’s mom invited me to dinner too. Can I stay?”

Mom’s lips flatten into a straight line, and I can tell she’s trying to come up with a reason to say no. “Sure,” she finally says. “But call me when you need a ride back.”

“I’m heading that way. I’ll take you,” Kat says, walking down the hall. “I’m probably going to be hanging out with you guys a little more—Owen’s coming out in June to stay with Griffon for a couple of weeks.”

“That’s great,” I say, wondering how weird it will be to double-date with my own sister.

“Did you ever find your phone?” Mom asks.

“Um, no,” I say, hoping she’s not going to ask any more questions. Knowing that it’s in a million pieces from being tossed off a three-story building isn’t exactly the same as finding it. The past week has been a nightmare, trying to act normal at home and at school with all that’s happened. I keep worrying I’m going to slip and give myself away.

She sighs. “We’ll see about getting you another one,” she says. “Be careful.”

I smile at that. If she ever had a clue what happened on the roof, maybe she wouldn’t worry so much about a simple trip to Berkeley. Or maybe she’d worry more.

“I might be out later, though,” she says, not quite as an afterthought. “If I’m not here, just call me to tell me you got home okay.”

I give Kat a look, but she just shrugs. Out? Mom never goes out, especially on Saturday night. “Out as in, on a date?”

Mom’s face gets surprisingly red in a very short time. “No. I’m going out with your father. Just to dinner and a play at the Orpheum.”

“Really?” I say. I’ve noticed that they’ve been spending more time together since the window accident, but I didn’t think it meant anything. Maybe they really are working through something in their distant past.

“It’s just dinner, guys. I know that look. Don’t get your hopes up.”

I put my hands up. “No hopes. I promise. Just glad that you’re going to do something fun. Maybe you should call me and tell me you got home okay.”

We’re barely through the door before Janine surrounds me with a giant hug. “Girl! Just look at you!” She pulls back and holds me at arm’s length. “Things could have turned out badly if it hadn’t been for you.”

I can feel my face flush. “If it hadn’t been for me, it wouldn’t have happened in the first place,” I say, still not totally understanding everything that went on. “I’m sorry I got Griffon mixed up with Veronique,” I add, not wanting to think about anything beyond today.

“I don’t know what the two of you are on about. I had everything completely under control,” Griffon says with a laugh. The black eye where the bullet grazed him is starting to fade, but he still has a bandage over the stitches on his cheek.

“Yeah,” Janine says. She swats him with a kitchen towel. “That’s exactly what it looks like.”

“I did,” he insists. “Veronique might be a good shot, but my reflexes are even better.”

I remember what she said about never missing with the gun, and I breathe in sharply. I thought that she just meant to score him with the bullet. “So she meant to hit you?”

“I’m sure she did. Luckily I was able to get out of the way.” Griffon puts a hand to his cheek. “Well, mostly.”

Janine folds her arms in front of her chest. “And ending up dangling off the edge of a roof, three stories up?”

Griffon grins. “Yeah. That was a little miscalculation.”

Janine reaches over and squeezes my hand. “All I’m saying is that things could have turned out much differently if Cole hadn’t been there. As it is, you’re going to have a nice scar on your cheek.”

“Oh, I have something for you,” I say, pulling a jar out of my bag and handing it to Griffon. I want to stop thinking about what might have happened if things had turned out differently. “It’s from Rayne.”

He opens it and sniffs the cream inside. “Smells good.”

“It’s some kind of honey-lavender thing that’s supposedly good for scarring. She says you need to put it on