Cipher

my face?”

She loved him most when he made her smile. “Will you still love me after my cousin smashes in your face?”

“Yes,” he said, suddenly serious. “Always.”

Kat lifted her fingers to his cheek, stroked his beard and wondered if she’d ever get tired of the thrill of touching him. Even with sadness and grief pressing in on her from every side, he made tomorrow worth living for. “Me too.”

Chapter Twenty-Four

Wyoming was mercilessly fucking cold, so cold that Andrew still hadn’t warmed up by the time Derek stopped hugging Kat, and that took almost half an hour. Finally, he reluctantly relinquished her to Mahalia’s care and beckoned for Andrew to follow him.

They walked down the hall to a library. What Alec had said about Derek’s constant worry was evident, because his friend looked like he’d barely been sleeping. “Has Nick been all right?” Andrew asked.

“She’s resting.” Derek dragged a hand through his too-long hair, which responded by standing straight up. “Christ, Andrew. I don’t—” He stopped and turned. “I don’t even want to know what happened. I don’t think I can handle it.”

“It’s in the past anyway,” he answered. “She’s safe now.”

Derek dropped into a rocking chair and braced his elbows on his knees. “And you and Kat…”

“Yeah. Me and Kat.” The only words that would suffice— me and Kat. “I’m going to marry her, you know. Well, after I ask, and provided she says yes.”

“Are you asking my permission?”

“No.” Maybe he should have been, judging from Derek’s forbidding look, but he didn’t have to. “She’s not a kid anymore, man, and we—we don’t want to be apart. It’s time to move on.”

Derek studied him in silence for long enough to be uncomfortable before looking away. “It would be nice to have my best friend back.”

It wasn’t until that moment that Andrew realized how much he’d needed to hear that. Nick had made an effort to pull them back together, but the specter of Kat’s broken heart had lingered between them, impossible to overcome. “I’d like that.”

“Good.” Finally, Derek smiled. “I should beat your ass around the room for not calling me, but my high ground’s a little shaky. Next time my cousin decides to play chicken with a cult? Maybe pick up the phone, Andrew, even if my wife is pregnant.”

“Talk to my alpha. He seemed to think you had enough on your plate.”

“Alec thought you could handle it, I guess. And you did.”

“No, I fucked it up.” And his mistakes had cost Ben and Lia their lives. “I won’t next time, though.”

Derek nodded to the couch across from him in a silent command. “I know. How it feels, I mean. To not save everyone.”

They all did, in one way or another. “Yeah.” Andrew sat and stared at Derek for a long moment, trying to reconcile the man before him with the one he’d known. “Shit, you’re going to have a kid.”

“And you’re going to marry my cousin. If she lets you.” Derek’s grin was lopsided. “Long way from a couple of humans who were going to build the most badass construction firm in the Southeast. Now I live on a ranch and you’re ruling New Orleans.”

Andrew snorted. “Assisting, maybe.”

“Uh-huh. Kat already told me that she’s going to help you save the world.”

After Zola and Walker taught them how to kick ass together, it was at the top of his list. “What can I say? She wants to be a big damn hero. This? I can give her this.”

Derek choked on a laugh. “Yeah, well, don’t forget to take holidays off. You’re family, and the Gabriels spend holidays together.”

He would have spent the last Christmas alone in his loft if Carmen and Julio hadn’t insisted he join them. “We’ll be here, you can count on it.”

“Damn right you will.” Leaning back, Derek raised both eyebrows. “So tell me what’s going on in New Orleans. The unedited versions. For a hacker girl, Kat’s weirdly in love with censoring the good stuff.”

The wistful note in his voice told Andrew that Derek missed it, maybe more than he realized. So he stretched his arms out across the back of the couch and grinned. “How much time do you have?”

“Until Kat gets worried that I really am killing you.”

The second time Nick threw up, Kat started to understand why Derek looked like he hadn’t slept in three weeks. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

“I’m fine.” She rinsed her toothbrush, tossed it back in the holder and leaned against the bathroom doorway. “Only now I’m hungry again. Damn it all.”

That had to be a special kind of hell. “Is this what it’s like all the time? The barfing and the being hungry?”

“So far, and it’s weird. I’ve never actually been nauseated and still wanted to scarf down a whole bucket of chicken.” Nick dropped to the bed and fell back. “Now I want fried chicken. I wonder if Mahalia would make me some.”

“Probably. Especially if you tell her I’m going to eat some too. Everyone seems obsessed with feeding me.” Kat shifted to lean more comfortably against the headboard. “At least I can give you a little peace from Derek now.”

“Ha.” Nick rolled to her side. “You don’t get it, lady. This kid has kicked his parental instincts into high gear. I’m lucky I’m not on bed rest already.”

Derek had been frantic enough in the first year after he’d become Kat’s guardian…and he hadn’t been a shapeshifter. “Yeah, maybe you are. He means well.”

“Of course he does. He wants the best for everyone, no matter what.” Nick’s dark eyes shone with love. “Unfortunately, what he thinks is best for me right now is to be carried everywhere, not lift a finger, and preferably wear clothes made of safety foam.”

“And you used to think I was joking about the bubble wrap. You better make sure he doesn’t line the kid’s walls with it.”

Nick propped her head up on her arm and watched Kat. “Are you okay? I mean, Ben was your friend, and with what happened to you and Julio…”

If anyone could understand, it would be Nick. Nick, who’d fallen in love with Derek in the midst of her sister’s greatest tragedy. Kat picked at the edge of the bandage around her left wrist and tried to figure out where to start.

In the end, nothing worked but the truth. “I feel like I should feel worse.”

A hint of a smile tilted the corner of Nick’s mouth. “Because you’re happy.”

“Because I’ve been through hell before. Andrew almost bled to death in front of me, and I walked away alone.” Kat shrugged helplessly. “It hurts. Ben, and what happened… It hurts a lot. But this time, I have Andrew. And he makes it hurt a little less.”

“That’s not a betrayal,” Nick whispered fiercely. “Anyone who cares about you would be glad, so glad that you have that.”

“I know.” And she did, because she could remember watching Derek watch Nick, and being so relieved that he was loved, even as her own heart broke. She hadn’t begrudged him those moments of happiness. She’d clung to them as proof that the world had a shred of hope. “Thanks, Nick.”

“Don’t thank me. It’s just the truth. The world can be such an ugly place, but it can also be so beautiful it takes your breath away. The trick is to try and find more of the beauty than the ugliness.”

Kat couldn’t stop her lips from curving up. “Andrew takes my breath away.”