I thought of the story Lavender had once told me about her relationship with Gideon and how he had risked his life to stand beside her when she was on trial for transplanting us all. I had no doubt that Gideon meant what he said. Whoever eventually caught his heart was going to be one seriously lucky gal.
But there was really only one set of hearts I was worried about at the moment. And mine was still too hurt to play nice. “Let’s go,” I murmured when Nicky merely stood there, his jaw clenched in anger at being called out.
The next thing I knew, I was standing in a bedroom the size of my entire apartment. A fire burned in the fireplace, casting soft amber light throughout the room.
“Is this the king’s estate?” I asked, the rather masculine decor a little on the tame side compared with what I’d seen when I last visited the mansion.
“Not exactly,” Gideon mumbled, still holding me in his arms. “I did not want to disturb the family, so I have brought you to my home on the estate instead.”
I glanced around. “Is this . . . um, your bedroom?” I asked, suddenly feeling a little awkward.
“What if it is?” he asked, pegging me with that gaze that was somehow still penetrating even behind his sunglasses. “Would you object?”
Suddenly his face felt a little too close to mine. “Listen, Gideon,” I said as gently as I could manage, “you’re a really nice guy, but—”
His chuckle rumbled deep in his chest. Then he lowered me to my feet. “This is one of my guest rooms.”
I felt my face light up like an inferno. “Oh. Of course. I knew that.”
He waved a hand toward a wardrobe that stood against one wall. “You will find anything you need in there,” he assured me. “Feel free to take whatever you like.”
“Thank you, Gideon,” I said, still trying to recover from my embarrassment. “I really appreciate this. It seems like my relying on others is becoming a really bad habit.” I sighed, thinking about how Nicky had taken me in just a couple of days earlier.
My sorrow and disappointment must’ve showed on my face because Gideon gently took me by the shoulders. “I have offered you my protection, Trish, and that offer does not expire. You are welcome to stay for as long as you wish.” Then his lips curved into a grin and he gave me a little chuck under the chin. “But I have a feeling you may not need to stay long.”
I frowned, intending to ask him what he meant, but he had vanished before I could utter a word. I went to the wardrobe he’d indicated and pulled open the doors, wondering what a guy like Gideon could possibly have lying around his bachelor pad when it came to the needs of an unexpected female guest, and so was startled to see quite a selection of jeans, T-shirts, sweaters, button-down oxfords, and shoes in my size and style.
“Damn,” I muttered. “I want Gideon to be my personal shopper. This guy’s good.”
I pulled out the bottom drawer and found a stash of delicates and a few pair of pajamas folded neatly in categorized stacks. There was also a little slip of dark green satin that caught my eye. I held it up and blinked in astonishment when I saw that it was actually a very simple but sexy nighty. Now, just who did Gideon expect me to wear this for? I glanced toward the door, wondering if maybe he hadn’t been joking after all. But since it was warm in the room with the fire going, the flannel pj’s were far from appealing, so I slipped out of my clothes and into the nighty, then crawled into bed.
As exhausted as I was, I was surprised not to fall asleep the moment my head hit the pillow instead of the twenty seconds it took. My sleep was deep and blissfully dreamless. So when I jolted awake sometime later, I wasn’t entirely sure what had roused me.
I sat up in bed, drawing the covers close to my chest, searching in the dim light from the fire, which had burned down considerably. And when I saw the figure sitting in a chair in the corner, I had to cover my mouth to muffle the scream it startled out of me. But fear quickly faded as my heart began to pound, making my voice breathless when I gasped, “My God.”
“Hi, doll.”
Nicky stood up and came slowly toward me, his expression twisted with anguish. He’d changed, I noticed. He was in the usual jeans and turtleneck sweater that molded so well to his sculpted chest. I hated that he looked so damned hot—I wanted to be mad at him a little longer, but it was growing more difficult with each step he took.
“What are you doing here?” I managed to ask, my voice choked at the sight of him.
He spread his arms out a little. “I had to see you. I couldn’t leave things the way they were.”
“So, you came to apologize for being an ass?” I sniped.
His jaw tightened a little and he planted his feet where he stood. “I wanted to check on you, make sure you were okay.”
Okay, so no apology forthcoming. . . . Got it.
I threw off the covers and got to my feet, crossing my arms over my chest in a huff. “Well, let’s see,” I drawled, “I was attacked by Dracula not once but twice after getting back from visiting our dear friend Red, who is in the hospital yet again because, as it turns out, Dracula has been attacking her and her unborn child, too!”
Nicky paled and blinked at me, clearly astonished. “Was he there? In the hospital?”
I gaped at him. Was he serious? I’d just told him that I’d been attacked twice and he wanted to know if Dracula had made a guest appearance at the hospital?
“No, Nicky,” I spat. “He wasn’t in the hospital. In fact, I think I’ve managed to draw him away from Red. Thanks for your concern about me, though. I appreciate it.”
“Trish—” He took a step closer, but I held up my hand to stop him from reaching for me. I so wasn’t in the mood for that apology now.
“Where were you, Nicky?” I demanded. “When Red was lying in the hospital and everyone else who cares about her was crowded around the bed, where were you? While I was struggling for my life, trying not to drown in the blood that was filling my lungs, where were you?”
He shoved his hands into his pockets and regarded me evenly, but said nothing.
“I needed you!” I hissed. “I couldn’t even call you after the attack. The only person I could depend on was Gideon!”
His eyes flashed with anger, jolting him out of his silence. “What do you want from me, Trish?” he spat. “You tell me my wife took a hit out on me and you don’t think that’s going to fuck with my head?”
“Of course I knew it!” I yelled. “Why do you think I never said anything? I would do anything to save you pain! Don’t you see that, Nicky?”
“Why?” he demanded, his voice tight. He closed the gap between us and took hold of my upper arms. “Why wouldn’t you just tell me?”
I shoved him hard, pissed off that he could be so freaking dense. “Because I love you, you stupid son of a bitch! I always have!” Now that I was on a roll, I had to let it all out, all the pain, all the frustration from the decades of longing for someone I didn’t think could ever be mine. “I fell in love with you the day we arrived when I saw the soul of you. It killed me to see you with Red all that time. And then when you married Juliet . . . I didn’t think I could ever get over that pain, but I just wanted you to be happy. Then I saw you that day in the lab, and everything I’d been trying to forget came rushing back in an instant.”
“Trish . . .” He reached for me, but I deflected his hand.
“When I saw what was in Juliet’s thoughts that night, it broke my heart,” I went on, not letting him derail me as the words came tumbling out. “Because when you’re not being a total jackass, Nicky, you’re the most noble, honorable man I’ve ever met. And you deserve to be loved by a woman who’s worthy of you!”
He shook his head. “The things I’ve done—especially since Juliet died—I’m not the man I was the day we came over. You don’t know me anymore. There’s a lot I deserve, probably none of it good. But I know one thing for sure—I don’t deserve you, Trish.”
I grunted, disgusted with his self-pity. “Screw it,” I muttered, going around him to get to the door. I didn’t know where I was going; I just knew I didn’t want to be there with him at the moment. “This is bullshit. I’m done.”
“Trish!” Nicky called as I reached for the door.
“I don’t think you could possibly have anything else to say to me,” I shot back, hand on the doorknob. “I told you I love you, and you threw it back in my face. I think how you feel is pretty freaking clear. I see now that I’m
