Perfection

She wished she had more to cherish. The loss she felt in her chest, for a man she’d just met, was profound. The way he’d touched her life, in such a short time, amazed her. No wonder emotions and attachments were prohibited at The Center. She felt drained.

Ellyssa felt so alone.

Then, there was Rein. She wanted to talk to him and apologize for harboring her secret, risking his trust. He’d been gone longer than any of them had expected, but no one seemed worried. Woody had told her that sometimes there were unforeseen hang-ups, delaying travel. His words didn’t comfort her.

The sadness, the loneliness, the worry ate at her. Ellyssa needed serenity, to block out everything.

She stood and started her tai chi exercises. The fluid movements and slow breathing were calming, much more so than karate. It was one thing she’d secretly relished for as long as she could remember.

Ellyssa’s feet slid across the floor, lightly, as if she could defy gravity, her hands fluidly moving from side to side, lightening her sorrow. Finishing the second in the series, she pulled her feet together and bowed to the wall.

“Doc said you were a beautiful sight to behold, but I never imagined,” Woody said.

She had heard Woody come in and hoped he would go away. She didn’t feel like talking to anyone, even after the moment they had shared. Besides, she didn’t know how to act now that he had seen her at her weakest. He’d witnessed a whole new Ellyssa. She ignored him and started on the next set of graceful movements.

“Ellyssa, may I have a moment?” Woody asked.

Ellyssa’s hands flopped to her side. “Yes.” She returned to her cot. “Please.” She offered him a seat across from her.

“I won’t be staying,” he said, much to her relief. “I just wanted to say I’m sorry for my previous behavior.”

“No apology is necessary.”

“No, there is. Jordan was right.” Woody’s voice choked on the old leader’s name. “You can teach our people a lot.”

Placing his elbows on his knees, he looked at her, his tired grey eyes full of sadness, his hair in disarray. “I was part of society at one time. I ran away when I was eight.”

Ellyssa was taken aback. “You ran away?”

Woody nodded. “My eyes aren’t quite right, and my hair…” He waved his hand as if presenting the trouble crowning the top of his head. “My real mother couldn’t stand to look at me anymore—because of my imperfections. I overheard my parents. They wanted to send me to the camps. I ran.”

“How did you survive?”

“One evening, late at night, I was rooting around in some trash cans, in search of something to eat.” He chuckled as a look of disgust registered on Ellyssa’s face.

Partly aghast at his rummaging for food in garbage, and the other part angry over her lessening ability to pay attention to control, Ellyssa blanked her face.

“A woman heard me and came out to investigate,” he continued. “I tried to hide behind the can, but she saw me and easily coaxed me out with a piece of bread.” Shaking his head. “I was bought with a piece of bread. Can you believe it?”

Ellyssa didn’t know whether to respond. The answer was yes, though, she could believe it. Regular society’s children were not taught the art of survival.

“I was lucky. Very lucky. The woman who coaxed me out was part of the movement.”

“Just how many are there?”

“More than you would think. More than even we know. The lady,” Woody continued, “brought me here. Jordan took me as his own.” He rubbed his hands together and stood. “Listen, I just wanted you to know I’m sorry.”

“Accepted.”

He left the room.

Feeling better, Ellyssa finished her exercises with a lighter heart. She liked Woody. Not only for holding her when she’d broken down, but for exposing a part of himself to her.

26

Ellyssa was amazed how close the storage room was to where she’d been staying the last few weeks. Not once had she heard scraping boxes, or people filing in and out for supplies.

She opened the closest box and pulled out an industrial can of peaches, like the ones the cafeteria at The Center served. She folded the lid down and placed it on top of another box with the same contents.

“You should see this place when it’s full,” Trista said, carrying a carton marked with a red cross. “This is nothing.”

“How long will this last?”

Trista looked around. Beside the one box of medical supplies, the few remaining boxes held a dwindling stockpile of food. “Maybe a week, with hunting.”

“I am amazed you have this much.”

“We get a lot of help.” Trista set the medical supplies next to the doorway. “So, what’d you think of the council members?”

Ellyssa pushed a large box against the wall as she thought about her newly assigned duties.

Yesterday, a council meeting had been held. Unfortunately, it had been Jason who escorted Ellyssa to an unfamiliar part of the cavern, where the meetings were held. Distrustful of him, she’d kept her mind open to his thoughts.

The images she’d received had been twisted, violent…and lustful.

Ellyssa had prevented herself from taking him down right then. Thoughts were thoughts. Actions were what counted and, so far, he hadn’t done anything.

When they’d reached the meeting room, Jason had entered first, brushing against her as he passed. His brief touch had caused nausea to roll in her stomach. He was lucky she’d fought the impulse that had swelled inside her. Maintaining her composure, she’d pretended nothing had happened.

Woody had smiled encouragingly as Ellyssa had entered the tiny room, furnished with an old, rectangular table and metal folding chairs, like the researchers used during training at The Center. She’d made her way to sit next to him, then met the other council members.

Eric, who was fifty—his grandparents among the original survivors—had caramel skin, like he was from Eastern descent, and hair a shade lighter than his complexion. He was friendly, and shook her hand when he introduced himself, as if they were old friends.

Brenda, the only other female council member, was about forty, with premature greying hair and big eyes framed in blond lashes. By the way she spoke and presented herself, Ellyssa had determined that she was very intelligent. She had found out later, after the meeting, that Brenda had defected from society about twenty years ago.

“They were very accommodating,” Ellyssa finally replied to Trista’s question.

“Rein?” Trista asked.

The mention of his name let loose butterflies in Ellyssa’s chest. Was he back? Hopeful, she turned toward the bouncy blonde. “Has he returned?” she asked.

Trista frowned. “No.”

“Oh.” Ellyssa poked around in a box, trying to hide her disappointment. “What about him?”

“You know, what do you think?”

Taken aback, Ellyssa gawked at her. “About Rein?” She felt the heat creeping up her neck. Was this girl talk? She’d never participated in the social custom of talking about boys. Not that she’d ever participated in anything more than flat, emotionless speech.

A sly smile curled Trista’s lips. “Well?”